The Gate Lice are coming... the GATE LICE are coming
#1411
Join Date: Aug 2008
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Agree it works, but not on the NRT MNL or MNL NRT flights, even with the signs and people it's still a zoo. There can be more pre board wheelchairs than regular passengers. You will never see so much carry on, and I've seen 1person with a BE ticket bring 8 or 9 family members or friends with them when boarding, when the 8 or 9 are sitting in Y.
#1412
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Disagree. I, and I'd bet many other elites, would still pay for the carry-on because of the many benefits of carrying on once you arrive at your destination. Or, more likely, the fee would be waived as an elite benefit anyway and it becomes a net change of zero.
#1413
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#1414
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Agree it works, but not on the NRT MNL or MNL NRT flights, even with the signs and people it's still a zoo. There can be more pre board wheelchairs than regular passengers. You will never see so much carry on, and I've seen 1person with a BE ticket bring 8 or 9 family members or friends with them when boarding, when the 8 or 9 are sitting in Y.
IME the PVG flights are bad, both at PVG and DTW.
#1415
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: BDU
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DL has no reason to change things. They don't care about what a mess boarding has become because the flights leave on time (the GAs are truly amazing at this), costs are low and profits are high. They aren't going to risk changing any of these things because we don't like how the boarding process works.
#1416
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Greatest gate lice attack today. Sfo flight to SLC. 3 pax in SP line. FA announces gate change and the three lice race in their suits to the new gate. Keep in mind arriving pax have not even deplaned yet. They hog the SP Kane so arriving pax can't use the SP lane to hk into the terminal.
Pics to come.
Pics to come.
#1417
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: MCO
Programs: DL-DM/1MM, HILTON-DIA, .HYATT-DIA/GLOB , IHG-PLT,HERTZ 5*, NATIONAL ES
Posts: 8,691
Greatest gate lice attack today. Sfo flight to SLC. 3 pax in SP line. FA announces gate change and the three lice race in their suits to the new gate. Keep in mind arriving pax have not even deplaned yet. They hog the SP Kane so arriving pax can't use the SP lane to hk into the terminal.
Pics to come.
Pics to come.
Yay, I am on the SFO-SLC flight tomorrow...
#1418
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#1419
Join Date: Dec 2004
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The problem is F pax in bulkhead F seats who want to be sure they get overhead space, pax in the second row who want to beat the people in the bulkhead to get overhead space before the bulkhead pax, everyone else in F who doesn't want to get stuck standing while others put stuff in the overhead, people in EC who want to get overhead space before other EC passengers, DMs who didn't get UGd, PMs and GMs who think they should board before others, credit card holders who think Zone 1 boards early, FOs who think it's unfair that they board after SKY so it's their right to crowd, kettles who do not know better and kettles who know better but think if they're at the front, when Zone 3 is called, they may still get overhead space.
In other words, the problem is everyone but me.
👏👏👏
I've posted this before. The problem would be solved if DL installed trap doors that open with the first boarding call, depositing all the lice into a cage below. DL could then parade those in F on high litters onto the plane. The litters could return for DM, PM and GM. After that, the cage could elevate, returning the lice to the gate area. Hungry tigers could then be released in the gate area, but be kept from Jetway. The remaining passengers would be forced to quickly get onto the Jetway.
Or DL could adopt WNs boarding policy, but not their seating policy.
In other words, the problem is everyone but me.
👏👏👏
I've posted this before. The problem would be solved if DL installed trap doors that open with the first boarding call, depositing all the lice into a cage below. DL could then parade those in F on high litters onto the plane. The litters could return for DM, PM and GM. After that, the cage could elevate, returning the lice to the gate area. Hungry tigers could then be released in the gate area, but be kept from Jetway. The remaining passengers would be forced to quickly get onto the Jetway.
Or DL could adopt WNs boarding policy, but not their seating policy.
I'm not sure if this has been posted in this thread, but all over Asia, when flying Delta, there are staff that magically appear at boarding time. Each Delta staff member holds a sign above their head: 1st, Sky, Zone 1, etc. Works perfectly. I know the USA is a broke-... country and can't afford the extra people, but this solution works very well.
#1420
Join Date: Jul 2005
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I have seen them in AMS (and something smaller but similar in SIN). I hated it at first...but it does work quite well to part the lice in those cramped AMS gate houses.
#1421
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 662
Also, no offense to those of you with thick necks, shaved heads and goatees who like to wear faded golf shirts and link chain necklaces, but I do notice something of a pattern in the most common "I'm first: deal with it" passengers.
#1422
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I am currently enroute JFK-SLC, which isn't exactly unusual -- but what is unusual is that I'm on JetBlue. There were no lice to speak of at my gate at JFK, other than a family yelling for the mother to leave the Best Buy vending machine so they wouldn't miss the flight.
I can't confirm, but based on experience I suspect that the majority of the passengers on Delta's JFK-SLC were gate lice.
Just a different perspective
-J.
I can't confirm, but based on experience I suspect that the majority of the passengers on Delta's JFK-SLC were gate lice.
Just a different perspective
-J.
#1423
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 39
Sung to the tune of "I'm a girl watcher"
I'm a louse watcher
Gate louse watcher
Watch them block the aisle
My, my, my
I'm a louse watcher
The gate lice watcher
Here they all are now-
There's a louse I'm gonna meet
Because he's trying poach my seat
Overhead bins are full
My carryon went into the hold
Now I'm a louse also
I'm a louse also
Gonna block the aisle
Make the diamonds cry
Now I'm a louse also
I'm a louse also
Wishing I was sky-
I'm a louse watcher
Gate louse watcher
Watch them block the aisle
My, my, my
I'm a louse watcher
The gate lice watcher
Here they all are now-
There's a louse I'm gonna meet
Because he's trying poach my seat
Overhead bins are full
My carryon went into the hold
Now I'm a louse also
I'm a louse also
Gonna block the aisle
Make the diamonds cry
Now I'm a louse also
I'm a louse also
Wishing I was sky-
#1424
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#1425
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