Do you mind if I borrow your pen?
Sep 8, 2018, 5:07 am
#91
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: United Kingdom
Programs: Bonvoy LTTitanium, BAEC Silver
Posts: 591
This thread is hilarious. Pretty much confirms that 'love thy neighbour' is dead in the water. Putting aside expensive fountain pens and germs, for me it's not a matter of rights and obligations but just about helping someone out at little or no cost and inconvenience.
Sep 8, 2018, 8:44 am
#92
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 80
My wife is one of those people who always carries a pen (plus a small notebook) and while she it happy loan a pen to someone else, she cannot understand why people don't have pens on them.
It's rubbed off on me although I never have the forethought to stick a pen in my pocket - I now have a 3" Space pen clipped to my keyring and I'm more likely now to jot down things that I never bothered before.
I'm quite happy to lend it out but maybe that's because the cap stays firmly on the keyring :-)
It's rubbed off on me although I never have the forethought to stick a pen in my pocket - I now have a 3" Space pen clipped to my keyring and I'm more likely now to jot down things that I never bothered before.
I'm quite happy to lend it out but maybe that's because the cap stays firmly on the keyring :-)
Sep 8, 2018, 9:08 am
#93
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: NYC
Posts: 419
Of course the OP's seatmate has the right to lend or not, and explain or not, but the "Yes I do" response seems unduly harsh. "I'm sorry, but I don't lend pens because I don't always get them back" or "I'm sorry, but this pen means a lot to me so I don't like to lend it out" (unlikely the reason if it was a Bic) might have reduced the OP's surprise. I think "Do you mind if I borrow your pen?" is perfectly polite.
Seth
Seth
Sep 8, 2018, 9:28 am
#94
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 4,374
Of course the OP's seatmate has the right to lend or not, and explain or not, but the "Yes I do" response seems unduly harsh. "I'm sorry, but I don't lend pens because I don't always get them back" or "I'm sorry, but this pen means a lot to me so I don't like to lend it out" (unlikely the reason if it was a Bic) might have reduced the OP's surprise. I think "Do you mind if I borrow your pen?" is perfectly polite.
Seth
Seth
Sep 8, 2018, 10:34 am
#95
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Prince Edward Island
Programs: Air Canada P25K, Hilton Honors Gold, Marriott Gold, MGM Gold
Posts: 1,582
This thread is hilarious. Pretty much confirms that 'love thy neighbour' is dead in the water. Putting aside expensive fountain pens and germs, for me it's not a matter of rights and obligations but just about helping someone out at little or no cost and inconvenience.
Sep 8, 2018, 10:44 am
#96
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Aug 2017
Programs: AS 75K, DL Silver, UA Platinum, Hilton Gold, Hyatt Discoverist, Marriott Platinum + LT Gold
Posts: 10,502
that aside, his point is still valid.
to tack on that, some carriers are omitting pens from their J amenity kits. the 0.10c or whatever unit cost it is for a pen, i'd imagine is far more useful to most people than the 0.15c miniature tube of hand cream and lip balm (or maybe theyre even free as part of co-marketing exercise)
to tack on that, some carriers are omitting pens from their J amenity kits. the 0.10c or whatever unit cost it is for a pen, i'd imagine is far more useful to most people than the 0.15c miniature tube of hand cream and lip balm (or maybe theyre even free as part of co-marketing exercise)
Pens in the kit are generally tiny - thet are hard to write with.
I generally have lots of pens in my bag from hotel stays. I let other pax keep them.
Sep 8, 2018, 3:25 pm
#98
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: London, UK
Programs: BA Executive Club (Silver), Le Club Accor (Silver)
Posts: 680
Through the course of my travels, I quickly learned that having a pen with me to fill in landing, customs or immigration cards on board could save me 30 minutes or more in an immigration queue. Thus I now always carry a cheap one with me. Without fail, my seatmate or someone nearby will ask to borrow it and I'm absolutely fine with this, although occasionally I'll have to ask for it back if it goes on a tour of the aircraft.
Sep 8, 2018, 5:25 pm
#99
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: SFO
Programs: AA, UA lowly commoner
Posts: 782
I normally carry a pen with me, but sometimes I (gasp!) forget things or lose them en route. I wish I were perfect, but sadly I'm not.
Luckily, when I've asked to borrow a pen, the lender has cheerfully obliged, apparently without dismissing me for being stupid or otherwise undeserving of such a gross imposition. Conversely, I lend my pen without a hassle. But then, I'm back in Y with the other imperfect amateurs and I just carry a tacky old Pilot or Pentel.
Luckily, when I've asked to borrow a pen, the lender has cheerfully obliged, apparently without dismissing me for being stupid or otherwise undeserving of such a gross imposition. Conversely, I lend my pen without a hassle. But then, I'm back in Y with the other imperfect amateurs and I just carry a tacky old Pilot or Pentel.
Sep 8, 2018, 5:27 pm
#100
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 3,359
On a side note, if I were to borrow someone's pen to fill out said forms, would it be more polite for me to pass it around and lend it to other hapless travellers or return it to the lender?
-James
-James
Sep 8, 2018, 6:09 pm
#101
Suspended
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Ontario, Canada
Programs: Aeroplan, IHG, Enterprise, Avios, Nexus
Posts: 8,355
Of course the OP's seatmate has the right to lend or not, and explain or not, but the "Yes I do" response seems unduly harsh. "I'm sorry, but I don't lend pens because I don't always get them back" or "I'm sorry, but this pen means a lot to me so I don't like to lend it out" (unlikely the reason if it was a Bic) might have reduced the OP's surprise. I think "Do you mind if I borrow your pen?" is perfectly polite.
Seth
Seth
What was rude was the OP's comment to his wife.
Sep 8, 2018, 6:36 pm
#102
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: SEA
Posts: 2,556
The OP was rude ("I literally chuckled out loud ... and loud enough for him to hear said ''Who wouldnt let someone a pen!"), indignant at a total stranger because he didn't get his way.
Sep 8, 2018, 7:57 pm
#103
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 4,374
I disagree emphatically with the last two posts. Declining to lend a pen is perfectly fine. Declining in a curt manner is demeaning and dismissive. A substantive explanation ("the pen is expensive, sentimental, etc.") is unnecessary, but implicit acknowledgement that the request is eminently reasonable is necessary. "I'm sorry, I prefer to keep my pen to myself. Perhaps you may ask a flight attendant?"
Polite behavior all around keeps everyone comfortable. Only in the unlikely event someone insists or demands to borrow the pen, is a more direct "No, sir/ma'am," appropriate.
Polite behavior all around keeps everyone comfortable. Only in the unlikely event someone insists or demands to borrow the pen, is a more direct "No, sir/ma'am," appropriate.
Sep 8, 2018, 8:32 pm
#104
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 196
Not if you fly on Delta. My last trip to YVR - I forgot my pen and the "flight attendant" was just as pissy as the person described by OP. She never did bring me one.
Sep 8, 2018, 9:13 pm
#105
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 167
Ah yes, the me me me age. I don't have a pen. Lend ME yours! I need to fill out MY form! You didn't lend ME your pen? I will make a snotty comment to MY wife who is sitting beside ME! Because you didn't lend ME your pen I am going to whine on the the internet about it.
What is even less common these days is self-reliance.
What is even less common these days is self-reliance.
If instead they whine about "me first" and "self reliance" you can be rather sure they attended a terrible school.