rickg523

This is very much the truth. A couple with separate seats sits together - in the most advantageous of their two choices of course - then looks at you like you're a home wrecker when you want your seat. Its happened enough (and I suspect this applies to everyone who travels solo a lot) that I've begun to think this is a fall back strategy that couples engage in rather than taking the time and trouble ensuring or - heaven forbid! -purchasing adjacent seats. And I say that having recently noticed that this seems remarkably prevalent on return trips from vacation destinations. Who wants to spend time checking in on the last day of vacation; just do it at the airport and sit together regardless.

jrl767

far too many have destroyed the entire "It's usually easier to apologize than to ask permission" paradigm by effectively saying "blank apologizing, blank asking; I'll just be passive-aggressive and get what I want anyway"

it's not so much that common sense isn't so common any more, it's that common courtesy is an endangered species verging on extinct

travellingwineO

Pardon my ignorance, but how does one tell that another passenger is non-rev?

saxman66

The thing is that the non-rev is question wasn't even riding on his/her own airline. United can't really punish someone that doesn't work for them. And I seriously doubt Southwest would even take the time to figure who it was out of thousands of employees, especially when it wasn't even on their own metal. Unless you got their name, I doubt any boss would look much into it.

o mikros

(bolding mine)

This is the part that bugs me to no end. Yesterday on a transcon (EWR-SFO) a family with two kids ages approximately 7 and 10 got on towards the end of boarding. They were assigned four different middles throughout E+ on a 777, and were loudly speaking to each other from opposite aisles: "I know we're separate, but we'll just have to get someone to switch." "Why don't you ask the guy in that seat there?" "No, it would be better if we get those seats there together, ask her."

All super loud, all very obvious to the entire E+ mini-cabin. Also obvious to me: a family who didn't want to shell out the extra $115/person at check-in to sit together (and yes, there were plenty of adjacent sets of four seats available at T-24 hours).

Now, I understand why families want to sit together. I understand them not wanting to pay an extra $500 to do so. Frankly, I think the airlines should reserve a couple rows in E- for exactly that purpose. But that's not what United does, and the family chose to go with them as a carrier and chose to not pay to sit together. Instead, they used the passive-aggressive approach to guilt/bully people into switching for their middles.

rjque

That's definitely a big deal. Getting out of the way of everyone else trying to board while waiting for the owner of a seat you would like to trade is not a big deal.

rjque

I disagree that the legitimate seat holder "appear[s] like a jerk in public" when he declines to trade, but even so, isn't that true whether the "poacher" makes the request from a seated or standing position?

BadgerBoi

If it's standing it's not a poacher.

If it's already planted its fat arse in your seat then it is, and it has the potential to try to make you look like the bad guy.

Henla

It is to me and, TBH, if someone wants my seat, my opinion is the only one that matters.

CarolynUK

Like many others on the thread, my experience is that those who desire swaps in the main always want to improve their situation rather than offering up their own more attractive seat for trade.

My own experience was on a BA flight from AMS to LGW. I had selected seat 1F when online check in opened (and I had nearly the whole cabin to choose from at that point), and was one of the first to board and settle into my seat with my book. I became aware of a couple of older ladies standing in the aisle having a discussion ABOUT me rather than WITH me.

One of the ladies was clearly my 1D seat mate, and they wanted me to swap seats with her friend, but weren't asking me outright - it was things like "I'm sure she'll move for you" and "we need to sit together" rather than "Excuse me would you mind swapping seats with me as I would like to sit next to my friend?". I interrupted their chat and told them that I would not be changing my front row window seat for her aisle seat at the rear of the cabin, and suggested that if they wished to sit together, that they could ask the person at the back if they would like to swap for the front row.

At this point, the companion attempted to sit in 1E (BA block out the centre seat in their business cabin) at which point the cabin crew member intervened and told her to go to her seat, and reiterated that they should ask the other passenger if they wished to swap. Needless to say, Mrs 1D had no intention whatsoever of changing her prime seat for a window seat in row 6, and the sat down very grumpily (I don't think her friend bothered asking her seatmate to swap!

It was funny watching the behaviour of Mrs 1D though. She dumped her huge bag in the centre seat immediately the seatbelt light went off trying to stop me getting any benefit from it (didn't need it as I already had everything I needed for the flight), tried to obstruct the F&B service ( but the nice FA simply leaned round the bulkhead to hand me my drink and then my food tray), and refused to move to let me out for the loo - again the set up meant that I didn't actually need her to move, so all her attempts to make me uncomfortable and punish me for not giving in were absolutely wasted. Her infantile behaviour was not lost on other passengers in the cabin either, quite a few of whom laughed with me as we were waiting for our luggage. The cabin crew were also highly amused by her antics, as the chap who had thrown the middle seat squatter out rolled his eyes in her direction as I went back to my seat.

Henla

It doesn't seem too hard for the person wishing to trade to take his/her assigned seat and then to go back to make the request, as I presume you aren't talking about someone sitting in my seat and then asking me to go so far toward the back that it is hard to get forward from that seat to ask me first.

Anyway, it may be easier for a poacher to sit in my seat but, again, it's not easier for me to stand there and to inform the poacher that it's my seat.

DeepUnderground

Nope. I never missed that fact. Serious is in the eye of the beholder I suppose.

BearX220

Exactly. On the very few occasions when I have wanted to engineer a seat swap to sit with my wife, I STAND in the desired row until the rightful owner comes along, then ask politely. And I would never ask someone to downgrade from an aisle or window to a middle; the proposed swap has to be like-for-like or better.

Once the rightful owner sits down, a swap request becomes twice as onerous.

MSPeconomist

For all we know, this nonrev does the same thing on every flight. If no one ever reports him/her, he/she wins at the expense of revenue passengers.

vanillabean

How about leaving a brief seat swap request note and when the person looks around, wave kindly back?