Tom Ford

maybe I'm alone in this.. but I wish this sub-forum wasn't so quick to lock threads like this.

I don't frequent any other GLBT forums, and I find the perspective of FT gays to be quite informed and well written. I appreciate threads like this, even if they aren't directly addressing travel.

plagwate

Mo, is that you? I thought you were in SFO?!

carlosdca

Yeah...and according to that article:
#2 Santa Fe, New Mexico
#3 Las Vegas
#4 Orlando
#5 Pittsburgh...

Crazyhotelguy

Or if I am lucky, he will be on my Disney Cruise..... November......

adampenrith

Ive seen plenty of very attractive chiselled , perfectly groomed and dare I say HOT gay men who whine the whole time too.......

so lets stop slinging the names around.

If a gay guy wants to have attitude and whine all day long - how he looks is a different story

LineasAereas

+1

Unfortunately, there are plenty of gays who are attracted only to their own kind - be it skinny, fat, hairy, smooth, white, black, Asian, Latino. Happens less in the straight community I think, but not uncommon by any means.

In the end, there's a market for EVERYONE. I know plenty of people who like fat guys - I'm one of them. Proud card-carrying member since... not quite sure when.

Bonaventure

Condemnation is fair, not supporting the legitimate rights of an entire group suffering from discrimination (despite extremely severe, almost laughable if not tragic, internal contradictions) is not.

I remember reading an article despairing the author's life as being born both gay and black, "i would never wish that upon anyone". Add 'fat' to that, or maybe mix in some Asian heritage, maybe being short, maybe over the age of 40, the list goes on as to what the 'gay community' (and lets be frank, the term at this point is absurd given how much racism and discrimination occur within the 'community' and is either tacitly or explicited accepted) endorses by failing to reform and change norms/behaviours/stereotypes. This deserves condemnation, and, while unfair, I can definitely see why some people believe the 'gay community' does not deserve its full rights in its current state.

ironmanjt

Gasp, but "some of my best friends are bears"

FlightNurse

I'm not too sure how I missed this thread when it was happening. But let me say a few things.

Discrimination happens within the gay community for many reason, and having been discrininated against by the same community in which I help each year was an eye opener. Doesn't matter if you are skinny, fat, leather or gender bender there are people in the gay community in which would love for you to go away..... Here in phoenix, we had an executive director of our pride who would walk the area in which people would line up for pride parade and if she thought you didn't meet HER standards of what she wanted to have in the parade she would either tell you, change what you are wearing and if you didn't she wouldn't let you and the group march... Needless to say this person no longer part of pride.

Fat people are wonderful people, some people like bigger guys some do not, this is what make the world go around. Granted, going to a White Party, the bigger guy might not get laid, but the same bigger guy who goes to the Black and Blue Ball would have a very full dance card..

I'm a very pround member of the Grand Canyon Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, one weekend we were out in force and had a wonderful time. When it came time to "take the face off" and enjoy ourselves as our secular self I meet a guy, we hit it off, and while talking, I told him I'm a sister. He was turned off and was speechless, he couldn't understand how a masculine man as myself could lower myself and dress like a women.

There are many more examples I can share that the gay community really needs to be more accepting of people before we "demand" it from others...

98103

For me, it isn't so much people's attitudes or "preferences" in physical attributes, it is the marketing. Set aside what you think some people think about fats, fems, blacks, asians, high school dropouts, etc. Look at marketing materials to the gay community, whether it is the gay portion of a destination web site, an airline's web site, or gay hotels or cruise lines. I am thick skinned so can put up with the walls that are thrown up around me by people, particularly the age one now that I am in the end of my 40s. For some reason I get more offended by corporate or business behavior in their marketing. As much as I'm told and reassured that gay cruises aren't really like the brochures, I'll wait until I see that reflected in marketing materials.

Adam1222

im pretty sure this topic was drummed into the ground, beaten like mr. ed, and thr fat lady sang. do we really need to get into this divisive topic again?

Bear96

I think you are conflating two things. I can "accept" someone without wanting to sleep with them. For a true "hookup ad" I see nothing wrong with getting to the point about what does / does not attract someone (though I have never seen a religious preference indicated if the intent is simply a hookup). Why waste anyone's time? I am not sexually attracted to women; does that make me anti-women?

As to non-sexual acceptance into the larger community, I have seen a lot less hostility and prejudice due to race and color, etc., than I have in the straight world (though certainly those things exist in the gay world as well). That may not quite be so when it comes to religion (though I do have a lot of friends who are both very religious and very gay), but I think that is mostly in response to the hostility organized religions have shown, and continue to show, towards homosexuality and the gay community.

Arcanum

It's a great article. I just stumbled across this thread while looking for the Master DO list, and if you hadn't posted the article I probably would never have read it. So, thank you!

Adam1222, if you're not interested in discussing this topic, just unsubscribe. It's not that hard.

Adam1222

Arcanum, I did not create the Flyertalk rules against resuscitating long dead threads. I look forward to another 5 people getting into the same disagreement they did 2 months ago. It's hard to imagine that there is any other fat gay person on the board who would like to share their feelings who hasn't yet.

DallasEsq

I agree with this sentiment, and I find it increasingly hard to balance "keeping it real" with people while also dealing with the increasing hypersensitivity people have these days. I'm ok with not being everyone's cup of tea, sexually or otherwise. While I don't want to be discriminated against by a business, I think people should be free to associate with me (or not) for any reason and not be scrutinized for it.