Going Home. Again
Jan 2, 2013 | 1:56 am
#21
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: PHX & AGP
Programs: AA PP, DL PLT, Bonvoy LT Titanium, HH LT Diamond, National Executive Elite
Posts: 13,367
"Do you remember our deal?" my wife said to me rather flippantly
"What deal?" I quipped
"The agreement we had that we were only going to do 3 years here. Do you ever listen to anything I say?"
I decided not to answer
"Well, do you?"
"Umm, sort of"
"Yes. The kids and I want to go home. As in to America"
"Really?"
"Yes, remember our agreement?"
"What agreement?"
She held up her hand in the form a stop sign, indicating that this was in fact, the end of our discussion.
"I have already found a house" she went on to say
"Really?"
"Yes"
"And where pray tell, are we going?" I enquired
"Colorado"
"So thats settled then, we'll leave at the end of the year. Take care of the flights" she barked.
And that was pretty much it.
"What deal?" I quipped
"The agreement we had that we were only going to do 3 years here. Do you ever listen to anything I say?"
I decided not to answer
"Well, do you?"
"Umm, sort of"
"Yes. The kids and I want to go home. As in to America"
"Really?"
"Yes, remember our agreement?"
"What agreement?"
She held up her hand in the form a stop sign, indicating that this was in fact, the end of our discussion.
"I have already found a house" she went on to say
"Really?"
"Yes"
"And where pray tell, are we going?" I enquired
"Colorado"
"So thats settled then, we'll leave at the end of the year. Take care of the flights" she barked.
And that was pretty much it.
Mt partner is from Flint, and know all about Michigan, when you wrote about your wife putting up her hand, I thought she was going to show you on her michgan map where you were moving to...
BTW, your family stories are too funny and so true of people from Michigan..
Jan 2, 2013 | 3:09 am
#22
Original Poster
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Denver, CO
Programs: UA GS-2MM, QF LTG, EK Gold, Marriott Amb, Hyatt Globalist
Posts: 4,006
Actually, moving countries is no more of a bigger deal than moving from one suburb to the next. Especially if you have done it before as we have. I think this is our fourth time. And hopefully our last. My wife keeps telling me that my next move will be to a single axle dwelling in a trailer park somewhere in Fargo. North Dakota.
That woman is seriously losing her sense of humor.
Anyway.
For those of you who don't know, Singapore is a transient city by nature. Of the 5 million people squashed onto a land mass of 400 square miles, 1 million of those people are "expats". People like you and me. There's like this revolving door at the end of each year. If you don't travel, it is quite understandable how some come down with "island fever". I could never live there 365-days a year. Would tip me right over.
The first part of our grand plan to come back to the states was to sort out the job scene. Being a typical male, I left my run until the last minute. My wife, on the other hand, simply told her boss that she had had a gutful of Singapore and was leaving. Or something like this.
She works for a big US corporation. But her boss is in Sydney. I feel for him, I really do. Although, he is greek. So he should be used to crazy women screaming at him all the time. But still.
I don't know if my wife is like yours, but when she works she is quite focussed and rarely gets distracted. Unlike me. It must be motherhood and turning 40 and being married to an adonis of a husband.
Or something like that.
The thing I like about American companies is that they tend to look after their own. Which is the way it should be. My better half has worked for this company essentially since she left college. She's survived a corporate bankruptcy. A couple of scandals. And a stint where the firm was being run by a religious madman who drove the thing into the ground. The organization has had more resurrections than Lazarus.
I think, when it all boils down to it, is that my wifes boss was spoken to in the same sort of way I was spoken to when told about our pending relocation. And because he's already probably got enough pre-menopausal women breaking his walnuts everyday, he most likely thought it was easier to send an email to his US colleagues, requesting Mrs Eightblacks transfer rather than sit on his hands and do nothing. Which wouldn't have ended well for him if he did.
If you're "lucky" enough to work for big corporate and they want you to go to another country, they pay for it. From soup to nuts. We've been fortunate to be on the receiving end of this benefit a couple of times before. But the world has changed. For us at least. This move is something we (correction, my wife) wanted. So we were funding the whole thing ourselves.
Enter the benefits of FT. In a moment.
The shipping costs. Well, we were pretty much on our own as far as this was concerned. What happens is that you call one of those reputable international movers and some well dressed person comes to your house with a clipboard and a measuring tape and they wander all around your house or apartment, muttering to themselves. At the end of the day, no matter how many quotes you obtain, the price is always the same. All your crap is either fitting into a 20 foot container. Or a 40 foot one. Or both if you wife is from upstate New York.
I was quite happy to leave all our stuff in Singapore and buy new stuff when we got to the US. All our appliances would have to be replaced anyway as apparently bad things happen to a 220 volt device if you connect it to a 110 volt outlet.
I tried to reason with my wife when the quotes came in for the shipping…
"Why don't we just sell everything and walk out with our luggage?. Lets not ship a thing" I said, using my most intelligent voice
"Don't be an idiot"
"But we could use what we are going to spend on shipping on buying the new stuff" I pleaded
"I said don't be an idiot"
"And another thing. We're taking the dog with us"
"We are?" I innocently responded
"Yes" came the defiant response.
"How much is that going to cost us?"
"Never mind" she said emphatically
I had to be careful here because I was treading on the proverbial marriage made quicksand. She who must be obeyed is a serious animal lover and she and the kids are rather fond of our hysterically neurotic Jack Russell.
After our first stint of living in the US (many years ago), we were then transferred to Sydney and instead of one dog, we had 2. Most useless canines ever. Small yappy things called Rat Terriers, with severe anger management issues. The smaller one ran into the bottom step of our garage one winter at full speed. It yelped for hours and the next day started walking with one leg constantly in the air. Our neighbor said it "had a bent frame" and we should take it back.
The other one was mildly electrocuted. Actually, in fact, they both were. You see, my wife in her wisdom decided that we should install one of those "invisible fences". For those non animal people, an invisible fence is essentially a cable or a wire, which is buried along the border of your property - including under your driveway. The dogs then wear these collars which have a small transceiver fitted to it. If the collar comes within 6 inches of the perimeter of your fence line (or boundary), the small canine is delivered a decent burst of electricity from the battery powered collar, to remind it not to cross over to the dark side. And to teach it some manners. Even the most stupid of animals quickly learn that it is bad karma to go near the fence line.
Not long after we had the invisible fence system put in, my wife had to take the dogs to the vet. So she loads the rodents into the back of her SUV, backs down the driveway, forgets something in the house, parks the car and runs inside to get whatever it is she was wanting and upon returning to the car, notices that the dogs are in fact quite cross.
In fact, they are both bouncing off the roof of the SUV like over zealous pin balls. In my wifes words, the dogs were "going psycho". Which was understandable when you realize that my intelligent spouse had parked the rear of the car on top of the perimeter line in the driveway, causing the shock collars to deploy maximum volts.
From that point on, neither dog was really quite the same. One walked with its back leg constantly cocked in the air and even though it was male, used to squat to pee. And the bigger dog took to attacking every delivery driver who ever set foot onto our humble abode, to the point of the local Fedex store banning all deliveries to us. I used to have to drive down to the depot to pick up every damn package.
Then when it came time to move to Australia, we starting making enquiries as to how much it was going to cost to move them. I about fell over.
As you would expect, I lost the argument and as we didn't yet have children, the dogs were the closest things to family we had (according to my wife).
I remember my neighbor hearing about the cost and coming over one day.
"There you go", he said as he put 2 12-gauge shot gun shells on our kitchen counter
"What are they for?" I innocently asked
I just saved you $10 grand he said...
Strewth, look at the time. We haven't even left yet...
That woman is seriously losing her sense of humor.
Anyway.
For those of you who don't know, Singapore is a transient city by nature. Of the 5 million people squashed onto a land mass of 400 square miles, 1 million of those people are "expats". People like you and me. There's like this revolving door at the end of each year. If you don't travel, it is quite understandable how some come down with "island fever". I could never live there 365-days a year. Would tip me right over.
The first part of our grand plan to come back to the states was to sort out the job scene. Being a typical male, I left my run until the last minute. My wife, on the other hand, simply told her boss that she had had a gutful of Singapore and was leaving. Or something like this.
She works for a big US corporation. But her boss is in Sydney. I feel for him, I really do. Although, he is greek. So he should be used to crazy women screaming at him all the time. But still.
I don't know if my wife is like yours, but when she works she is quite focussed and rarely gets distracted. Unlike me. It must be motherhood and turning 40 and being married to an adonis of a husband.
Or something like that.
The thing I like about American companies is that they tend to look after their own. Which is the way it should be. My better half has worked for this company essentially since she left college. She's survived a corporate bankruptcy. A couple of scandals. And a stint where the firm was being run by a religious madman who drove the thing into the ground. The organization has had more resurrections than Lazarus.
I think, when it all boils down to it, is that my wifes boss was spoken to in the same sort of way I was spoken to when told about our pending relocation. And because he's already probably got enough pre-menopausal women breaking his walnuts everyday, he most likely thought it was easier to send an email to his US colleagues, requesting Mrs Eightblacks transfer rather than sit on his hands and do nothing. Which wouldn't have ended well for him if he did.
If you're "lucky" enough to work for big corporate and they want you to go to another country, they pay for it. From soup to nuts. We've been fortunate to be on the receiving end of this benefit a couple of times before. But the world has changed. For us at least. This move is something we (correction, my wife) wanted. So we were funding the whole thing ourselves.
Enter the benefits of FT. In a moment.
The shipping costs. Well, we were pretty much on our own as far as this was concerned. What happens is that you call one of those reputable international movers and some well dressed person comes to your house with a clipboard and a measuring tape and they wander all around your house or apartment, muttering to themselves. At the end of the day, no matter how many quotes you obtain, the price is always the same. All your crap is either fitting into a 20 foot container. Or a 40 foot one. Or both if you wife is from upstate New York.
I was quite happy to leave all our stuff in Singapore and buy new stuff when we got to the US. All our appliances would have to be replaced anyway as apparently bad things happen to a 220 volt device if you connect it to a 110 volt outlet.
I tried to reason with my wife when the quotes came in for the shipping…
"Why don't we just sell everything and walk out with our luggage?. Lets not ship a thing" I said, using my most intelligent voice
"Don't be an idiot"
"But we could use what we are going to spend on shipping on buying the new stuff" I pleaded
"I said don't be an idiot"
"And another thing. We're taking the dog with us"
"We are?" I innocently responded
"Yes" came the defiant response.
"How much is that going to cost us?"
"Never mind" she said emphatically
I had to be careful here because I was treading on the proverbial marriage made quicksand. She who must be obeyed is a serious animal lover and she and the kids are rather fond of our hysterically neurotic Jack Russell.
After our first stint of living in the US (many years ago), we were then transferred to Sydney and instead of one dog, we had 2. Most useless canines ever. Small yappy things called Rat Terriers, with severe anger management issues. The smaller one ran into the bottom step of our garage one winter at full speed. It yelped for hours and the next day started walking with one leg constantly in the air. Our neighbor said it "had a bent frame" and we should take it back.
The other one was mildly electrocuted. Actually, in fact, they both were. You see, my wife in her wisdom decided that we should install one of those "invisible fences". For those non animal people, an invisible fence is essentially a cable or a wire, which is buried along the border of your property - including under your driveway. The dogs then wear these collars which have a small transceiver fitted to it. If the collar comes within 6 inches of the perimeter of your fence line (or boundary), the small canine is delivered a decent burst of electricity from the battery powered collar, to remind it not to cross over to the dark side. And to teach it some manners. Even the most stupid of animals quickly learn that it is bad karma to go near the fence line.
Not long after we had the invisible fence system put in, my wife had to take the dogs to the vet. So she loads the rodents into the back of her SUV, backs down the driveway, forgets something in the house, parks the car and runs inside to get whatever it is she was wanting and upon returning to the car, notices that the dogs are in fact quite cross.
In fact, they are both bouncing off the roof of the SUV like over zealous pin balls. In my wifes words, the dogs were "going psycho". Which was understandable when you realize that my intelligent spouse had parked the rear of the car on top of the perimeter line in the driveway, causing the shock collars to deploy maximum volts.
From that point on, neither dog was really quite the same. One walked with its back leg constantly cocked in the air and even though it was male, used to squat to pee. And the bigger dog took to attacking every delivery driver who ever set foot onto our humble abode, to the point of the local Fedex store banning all deliveries to us. I used to have to drive down to the depot to pick up every damn package.
Then when it came time to move to Australia, we starting making enquiries as to how much it was going to cost to move them. I about fell over.
As you would expect, I lost the argument and as we didn't yet have children, the dogs were the closest things to family we had (according to my wife).
I remember my neighbor hearing about the cost and coming over one day.
"There you go", he said as he put 2 12-gauge shot gun shells on our kitchen counter
"What are they for?" I innocently asked
I just saved you $10 grand he said...
Strewth, look at the time. We haven't even left yet...
Jan 2, 2013 | 3:28 am
#23
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: DFW...at the moment
Programs: AA EXP, SPG Plat, Hyatt Diamond, HH gold
Posts: 609
My wife and MIL are both staring at me, wondering why I am rolling with laughter. Great update, eightblack.
I haven't moved with a SO yet, but I know that moms and their dogs are hard to separate. My mom has spent more on her overgrown mop of a dog than on both children combined, and they haven't moved across any borders. At least our dog is smart enough to avoid the electric fence, which is not true of our neighbor's dog (which will come to our yard to visit our dog, which results in getting shocked by 2 electric fences in each direction!).
I haven't moved with a SO yet, but I know that moms and their dogs are hard to separate. My mom has spent more on her overgrown mop of a dog than on both children combined, and they haven't moved across any borders. At least our dog is smart enough to avoid the electric fence, which is not true of our neighbor's dog (which will come to our yard to visit our dog, which results in getting shocked by 2 electric fences in each direction!).
Jan 2, 2013 | 3:59 am
#24
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: PHX & AGP
Programs: AA PP, DL PLT, Bonvoy LT Titanium, HH LT Diamond, National Executive Elite
Posts: 13,367
.In fact, they are both bouncing off the roof of the SUV like over zealous pin balls. In my wifes words, the dogs were "going psycho". Which was understandable when you realize that my intelligent spouse had parked the rear of the car on top of the perimeter line in the driveway, causing the shock collars to deploy maximum volts.
I could stop laughing at this, what a mental picture you painted!
Thank you for the great laugh.
Jan 2, 2013 | 4:26 am
#25
Original Poster
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Denver, CO
Programs: UA GS-2MM, QF LTG, EK Gold, Marriott Amb, Hyatt Globalist
Posts: 4,006
Maddeningly though, the stupid dog got amazing connections. A direct flight from Singapore to Amsterdam. And then another direct flight from AMS to DTW. And then a 80-mile drive in the back of a small van to my mother in laws place, which is where the dog would be staying until we found a permanent place to live in Colorado.
Actually for what it cost, I was thinking about enrolling it into Delta Skymiles and seeing if I could earn some miles.
Anyway enough about animals. Silly things.
I started to work on the human travel requirements and this is where things sort of fell into place. First of all, we had to vacate our apartment around the middle of December. That worked well for several reasons. One is that I was about 11 nights short of re-qualifying for Hyatt Diamond. So I booked 4 nights in Singapore and used a Suite upgrade. Job done.
Then I booked 2 nights in DXB - again at the Hyatt, burnt another Suite upgrade. Most excellent.
As far as flights went, I sort of didn't have much choice. Family had already issued instructions that they were flying EK so apparently that was it then.
And I thought since we leaving Singapore for good, that we should leave with fond memories of the place. And take our time getting to De-friggin-troit. Trust me, I was in no rush. Neither would you be...
So I decided on a day and a half in Dubai - as the wife and kids had never set foot outside the airport. And then a stop in New York for a few days right before Xmas. And then a quick flight to DTW.
The good thing with EK is that if you choose A380 flights, because the J cabin has 76-seats, its not that difficult to find award seats. Ok, one-way awards may not be the best use of miles (according to the die hards out there) but if you can snag them (especially at Xmas), then it can literally save you a small fortune.
While I think it's a little crass to talk about money, give me a hall pass for a moment, because I think this is the only way to make a point.
I had the EK miles. Plenty of them. What I didn't have was $26K sitting in my pocket, which is what 4 x one-way J tickets would have cost on EK to go SIN-DXB-JFK in the middle of December, with a stop in DXB. And chauffeur drive out of SIN, again in DXB and then from JFK to Manhattan.
What I did was pull 2 one-way J awards, and then I purchased 2 Y tickets, and upgraded them to J with miles. All in total was just under $3K for the 4 of us. Guess what the blooming dog cost to ship?
Five grand.
I kept reminding my wife that she now owed me at least 5-years worth of sex credits but sadly her redemption desk is only ever open when there is a solar eclipse. Over Uzbekistan. In March.
What compounded all of this was that I was actually quite busy at work and was traveling like an idiot. So I actually never had to deal with the move out of the apartment. One day I left the place - and when I came back, the entire family were camped out at the Hyatt in Singapore.
Its funny going to a hotel in a city you have lived in for a long time. I remember coming back from the airport and then my wife texting me the room number. I had never stayed at the Hyatt before and was looking forward to enjoying the suite, and having a few quiet drinks in the lounge.
But then reality set in. When I opened the door to the room, my heart sank. The room looked like it had been occupied by a pack of gang bangers. For a week. Stuff strewn everywhere. The family may have checked into a suite when they arrived, but it sure as eggs wasn't a suite now. Nor might be ever again.
Both kids greeted me in a semi excited fashion.
"Hi Dad" my daughter said with an infectious smile
"Do you want something to eat?"
"No thanks"
"What about a drink?"
"What are you, a waiter for the hotel?"
"Dad, all the food is free"
"No its not"
"Yes it is. See you just press this button on the phone and order what you want and they bring it to you"
Then I saw them. Room service chits scattered from one end of the place to the other. My heart sank some more. My wife then blamed me for not being there for the past few days and this was all my fault. Apparently it's exhausting watching a herd of removalists pack your stuff and giving directions all day to the 2 Filipino housekeepers. But lets not go there.
I think I might have said this before somewhere, but I rarely travel with the whole family. Most family holidays we travel in 2 teams. The boys and girls go their separate ways and we just meet up at the destination. Much easier on everyone.
But this trip - I sort of had no choice. We had 10 suitcases, some soft bags and our wheelies. We didn't fit in a single taxi. So we had to ensure maxi cabs (like 7+ seater vans). Or 2 cars in some cases.
I can't tell you how painful it was. When I travel, I only ever travel with a laptop bag and my wheelie. Never check luggage. Ever. Don't care how long the trip is.
But moving the family was excruciating. First you need to plan in advance in terms of getting all the luggage back down to the lobby. Then you have to get everyone to agree to be in the lobby at a certain time. Then at the airport you have to either pay a porter a small fortune to move all your crap. Or use a weeks wages to rent 4 luggage carts.
Worse still, is that my family know how much I dislike traveling as a group (with them) so they wind me up even more, by wandering off all the time, pretending not to hear me, or wanting to go to the bathroom when we are about to board.
Thankfully, the Singapore to Dubai leg was the easy part. Changi is my second home and I have beaten a well worn path to the EK counter. Wife and kids slept for a good portion of the leg - while I calmed my nerves at the bar, at the rear of the upper deck. I thought it rude to not accept a drink when they had gone to all that effort.
As I said, Dubai was the easy part. Even though its busier than Grand Central station - it has plenty of infrastructure and it works like a charm.
One leg down, 3 more to go. Are you still with me...?
Actually for what it cost, I was thinking about enrolling it into Delta Skymiles and seeing if I could earn some miles.
Anyway enough about animals. Silly things.
I started to work on the human travel requirements and this is where things sort of fell into place. First of all, we had to vacate our apartment around the middle of December. That worked well for several reasons. One is that I was about 11 nights short of re-qualifying for Hyatt Diamond. So I booked 4 nights in Singapore and used a Suite upgrade. Job done.
Then I booked 2 nights in DXB - again at the Hyatt, burnt another Suite upgrade. Most excellent.
As far as flights went, I sort of didn't have much choice. Family had already issued instructions that they were flying EK so apparently that was it then.
And I thought since we leaving Singapore for good, that we should leave with fond memories of the place. And take our time getting to De-friggin-troit. Trust me, I was in no rush. Neither would you be...
So I decided on a day and a half in Dubai - as the wife and kids had never set foot outside the airport. And then a stop in New York for a few days right before Xmas. And then a quick flight to DTW.
The good thing with EK is that if you choose A380 flights, because the J cabin has 76-seats, its not that difficult to find award seats. Ok, one-way awards may not be the best use of miles (according to the die hards out there) but if you can snag them (especially at Xmas), then it can literally save you a small fortune.
While I think it's a little crass to talk about money, give me a hall pass for a moment, because I think this is the only way to make a point.
I had the EK miles. Plenty of them. What I didn't have was $26K sitting in my pocket, which is what 4 x one-way J tickets would have cost on EK to go SIN-DXB-JFK in the middle of December, with a stop in DXB. And chauffeur drive out of SIN, again in DXB and then from JFK to Manhattan.
What I did was pull 2 one-way J awards, and then I purchased 2 Y tickets, and upgraded them to J with miles. All in total was just under $3K for the 4 of us. Guess what the blooming dog cost to ship?
Five grand.
I kept reminding my wife that she now owed me at least 5-years worth of sex credits but sadly her redemption desk is only ever open when there is a solar eclipse. Over Uzbekistan. In March.
What compounded all of this was that I was actually quite busy at work and was traveling like an idiot. So I actually never had to deal with the move out of the apartment. One day I left the place - and when I came back, the entire family were camped out at the Hyatt in Singapore.
Its funny going to a hotel in a city you have lived in for a long time. I remember coming back from the airport and then my wife texting me the room number. I had never stayed at the Hyatt before and was looking forward to enjoying the suite, and having a few quiet drinks in the lounge.
But then reality set in. When I opened the door to the room, my heart sank. The room looked like it had been occupied by a pack of gang bangers. For a week. Stuff strewn everywhere. The family may have checked into a suite when they arrived, but it sure as eggs wasn't a suite now. Nor might be ever again.
Both kids greeted me in a semi excited fashion.
"Hi Dad" my daughter said with an infectious smile
"Do you want something to eat?"
"No thanks"
"What about a drink?"
"What are you, a waiter for the hotel?"
"Dad, all the food is free"
"No its not"
"Yes it is. See you just press this button on the phone and order what you want and they bring it to you"
Then I saw them. Room service chits scattered from one end of the place to the other. My heart sank some more. My wife then blamed me for not being there for the past few days and this was all my fault. Apparently it's exhausting watching a herd of removalists pack your stuff and giving directions all day to the 2 Filipino housekeepers. But lets not go there.
I think I might have said this before somewhere, but I rarely travel with the whole family. Most family holidays we travel in 2 teams. The boys and girls go their separate ways and we just meet up at the destination. Much easier on everyone.
But this trip - I sort of had no choice. We had 10 suitcases, some soft bags and our wheelies. We didn't fit in a single taxi. So we had to ensure maxi cabs (like 7+ seater vans). Or 2 cars in some cases.
I can't tell you how painful it was. When I travel, I only ever travel with a laptop bag and my wheelie. Never check luggage. Ever. Don't care how long the trip is.
But moving the family was excruciating. First you need to plan in advance in terms of getting all the luggage back down to the lobby. Then you have to get everyone to agree to be in the lobby at a certain time. Then at the airport you have to either pay a porter a small fortune to move all your crap. Or use a weeks wages to rent 4 luggage carts.
Worse still, is that my family know how much I dislike traveling as a group (with them) so they wind me up even more, by wandering off all the time, pretending not to hear me, or wanting to go to the bathroom when we are about to board.
Thankfully, the Singapore to Dubai leg was the easy part. Changi is my second home and I have beaten a well worn path to the EK counter. Wife and kids slept for a good portion of the leg - while I calmed my nerves at the bar, at the rear of the upper deck. I thought it rude to not accept a drink when they had gone to all that effort.
As I said, Dubai was the easy part. Even though its busier than Grand Central station - it has plenty of infrastructure and it works like a charm.
One leg down, 3 more to go. Are you still with me...?
Jan 2, 2013 | 4:50 am
#27
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: DCA
Programs: UA , UC, Marriott
Posts: 48
There goes all Productivity for the day! I'm glued to this and may be late for work! As always, a great read. the next time you find yourself in the DCA Area, I would be honored to share a few glasses of a fine single malt with you.
My only fear is that further updates will appear while I fly NRT-LAX.
