The size of the CA minimum wage is a different discussion, this thread is about tipping. The folks in CA working for minimum wage are better off than if they were in another state, simply due to the laws in CA requiring full minimum wage be paid to all workers, tipped or not.

My understanding is tipping as a social norm was started in the US by the Pullman company around 1900 to reduce the payroll cost of porters - which it did. At that time tipping was not customary in the US.

The ironic thing about tipping is that I get far better service in Taipei, where tip is not customary, than I usually do in most American restaurants. They tend to do a better job simply because it's their job - they earn a salary to provide great service and if they don't do well, they get fired, like most of us that work.

I generally don't like the tipping system, but since I grew up here in the US, I always try to tip well because it's the social norm. I personally don't think waitstaff notice the difference between a 15% tip for messing up orders, missing drink refills, and serving cold dishes versus the 21% when they do a great job. On smaller tabs, nobody sits there and mulls over the margins. Sometimes I wished there was a way to tip the cook, kitchen staff, and bus boys a higher percentage of the tip, so as to not screw them over along with the waiter/waitress if you received bad service.

Since this topic was about aggressive tip requests, here are my two stories:

1.
I read a post above that mentioned the "American discrimination" that the expectation is that Americans tip well in other countries - I couldn't agree more. A couple weeks ago, I got a 60-minute regular body massage at a typical hotel massage venue in Vietnam. In this country, people typically live off something like $6 USD a day, which is about 120,000 VND. My massage was 200,000 VND (~$10.00 US) which probably goes to the venue anyway, but it specifically stated on signs around the venue "tip is appreciated, but not required." I tipped 250,000 VND (~$12.50 US, 125% tip!!) as a feeler to see whether it was appropriate, and asked "is this about enough?"

The masseuse looked at me and frowned slyly saying "no, I think it should be 500,000 VND."

I laughed, put the 250,000 in her hand, gave her a hug and left. I'd give more hugs as additional tips, but some here in US call it sexual harassment.

2.
I was in a Korean restaurant here in America and my bill was ($8.95 + 8.75% tax = $9.73). I took the change, tipped $2, and the waitress became angry and asked "was there something wrong with your service today?" I responded, "No, why?" She pointed at the tip tray and demanded, "and you tip me this?" in front of my friends.

I was a bit puzzled so I said, "I think that's about right. That's about 20%." I was about to offer her a calculator, but she stared at me and then stormed off. Somehow, I don't think this would happen in Korea.

My reaction would be: "Ah, no. I'm not tipping you that." And i would have picked up the $2 again.

I do not live in a country where tipping is the norm. I will tip if in a country where that is the culture. However, I feel no obligation to make up someone's wages when the employer underpays. To me, tipping is for receiving good service and if I receive bad service or a blatant demand for a tip - I will not tip.

I would have said yes there is something wrong, and it is with your attitude. I then would have removed all of the tip and walked out without a care in the world.

Cab drivers are the worst, and Chicago cab drivers are especially bad.

Switching gears, I actually once had someone aggressively RETURN a tip to me. I finished dinner at a yakitori stand in Tokyo, and after paying with a paper bill, left the small change that I received back as a tip (even though I realize that tipping is not customary in Japan).

I got about a block-and-a-half down the street, when the poor server/yakitori chef came running up to me, totally out of breath and with a look of grave concern on his face, returning the money that he thought I had forgotten to take with me. The amount of money in question was no more than the equivalent of about $1.50 or so.

I felt so bad for the guy (and a little embarrassed that I may have inadvertently insulted him by tipping in the first place), but ended up insisting that he keep the money for his efforts and his honesty.

I travel all of the time and haven't run into this in the US. Instead of doing the passive-aggressive say nothing and post about it on the internet thing, why not just deal with it in person and move on with your life?

I don't understand why you left a tip when, even as a foreigner, you knew that tipping isn't customary in Japan. When I go to a country where tipping is the norm, then I do it (much as I disagree with the system). When I go to a country where tipping isn't the thing, I don't tip and I cringe when I see people trying to alter the local culture with their own customs by trying to force tips on people. Please, just don't do it, it's offensive.

He did, then he posted it on the internet.

When paying at take out or carry out places does anyone feel a sense of awkwardness or guilt when crossing out the tip line on a credit card recept? It is particularly bad when the cashier is standing right there. I hate carry out or counter service places that have a tip line on the recept. I cross it out of course but still it makes you feel guilty.

I order carry out at pizza hut on occasion, last night being the most recent. I walked in to place an order for carry out, had to repeat myself a second time because apparently the person thought I was there to pick up a carry out order when I made sure to say I want to place an order, in any case I get my food, pay, and leave. Get home and look at my recept and notice they screwed up. Pizza hut has a special where you order breadsticks and a soda you get a deal, well the cashier rang them up seperately so I was overcharged by like 2 dollars, now I would never make a stink about 2 dollars but it just confirms my belief that you should never tip for counter service especially since it seems like most of the time the employees are barely doing the minimum, if that. I actually stopped going to a local burger joint because of the tip line/tip jar crap. Most of the time it seems like the employees at this place act like you are an inconvenience when you walk up to the counter and place your order. It is a place where you place your order, pay for it, wait a bit, they call out your number and you take your own food to the table and put away your own trash when finished. You pay before you get your order so I just stopped going because I fear for the common fear that they will spit in my food when they see me cross out the tip line since you pay before you get your food.

Tip jars can easily be ignored, but credit card tip lines not so much especially since you have to cross it out, most of the time right in front of the employee. I hate the awkward and feeling of guilt, and fear of what can happen to my food when I do that even though tipping for counter service is assinine.

I can't blame him for being nasty. After all, those fart smells really do a doozy to your brain after a while.

^+1^

Totally agree.

Your point is taken. Here is what I find offensive: when people assume that they have the right to demand that others change their ways and habits and take personal offense to a practice that has absolutely no personal impact on them. I will take the liberty of concluding that my not bothering to pick up small change returned to me at a restaurant in Japan is not injurious to you. I don't assume that I will change you and your desire to scold others on FT, just as you should not assume that I will change for you.

Why do you have to cross it out? I just leave the tip and total lines blank, look at the amount to make sure it's correct, and sign. If I sign quickly without poring over the receipt, the employee will probably think I didn't notice the tip line.

...and in the process confirming many, many stereotypes.