The ironic thing about tipping is that I get far better service in Taipei, where tip is not customary, than I usually do in most American restaurants. They tend to do a better job simply because it's their job - they earn a salary to provide great service and if they don't do well, they get fired, like most of us that work.

I generally don't like the tipping system, but since I grew up here in the US, I always try to tip well because it's the social norm. I personally don't think waitstaff notice the difference between a 15% tip for messing up orders, missing drink refills, and serving cold dishes versus the 21% when they do a great job. On smaller tabs, nobody sits there and mulls over the margins. Sometimes I wished there was a way to tip the cook, kitchen staff, and bus boys a higher percentage of the tip, so as to not screw them over along with the waiter/waitress if you received bad service.

Since this topic was about aggressive tip requests, here are my two stories:

1.
I read a post above that mentioned the "American discrimination" that the expectation is that Americans tip well in other countries - I couldn't agree more. A couple weeks ago, I got a 60-minute regular body massage at a typical hotel massage venue in Vietnam. In this country, people typically live off something like $6 USD a day, which is about 120,000 VND. My massage was 200,000 VND (~$10.00 US) which probably goes to the venue anyway, but it specifically stated on signs around the venue "tip is appreciated, but not required." I tipped 250,000 VND (~$12.50 US, 125% tip!!) as a feeler to see whether it was appropriate, and asked "is this about enough?"

The masseuse looked at me and frowned slyly saying "no, I think it should be 500,000 VND."

I laughed, put the 250,000 in her hand, gave her a hug and left. I'd give more hugs as additional tips, but some here in US call it sexual harassment.

2.
I was in a Korean restaurant here in America and my bill was ($8.95 + 8.75% tax = $9.73). I took the change, tipped $2, and the waitress became angry and asked "was there something wrong with your service today?" I responded, "No, why?" She pointed at the tip tray and demanded, "and you tip me this?" in front of my friends.

I was a bit puzzled so I said, "I think that's about right. That's about 20%." I was about to offer her a calculator, but she stared at me and then stormed off. Somehow, I don't think this would happen in Korea.