I'd have to say that DYKWIA's and Kettles are slices from the same pizza in terms of wanton self-centeredness. Both think the airline owes them something. Yet the former expects something personal: special treatment, free seat in next class of service, compen$ation, and $o forth. Yet the latter takes things all too personally: ATC at ORD initiates flow control just to show the Kettle who is running the show. GA woke up that morning bound determined to give Kettle the worst possible seat on the plane. Connecting flight is cancelled for the sole purpose of causing Kettle to miss child's wedding. Humidity in the cabin is kept low just to dehydrate Kettle...

Or this alleged line from the series:

June: Ward, don't you think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night?

Those of us who work in the travel industry (not just airlines) have it even worse. After seven and a half years of doing this, it's hard to not roll my eyes at and tell off stupid customers. Fortunately, I'm a layer removed from front-line work, but I still have to deal with them on a daily basis. I actually have one of my employees quitting next week because she's tired of dealing with Kettles (and DYKWIAs, for that matter).

I like the travel industry, but I don't think I could do front-line ever again.

Aha. I get it.

Every activity has its experts and newcomers. Play tennis? You have to put up with new players who don't understand the etiquette, who wear incorrect shoes, or play past their reserved time, etc. Board Surf? Once you get good at it, you'll be irritated by those who come out once a year, at best, jump the queue for the good waves and make things difficult and dangerous for the other experienced surfers.

It's no different with airline travel. Those who travel often know the drill. They can get through TSA quickly and efficently. They get elite status and upgrades. Naturally an expert flyer is irritated with newcomers who don't know the procedures and etiquette of air travel, just as expert tennis players or board surfers get irritated with people who don't understand the procedures and etiquette of their activity.

There are plenty of inexperienced travelers ("Kettles") who are experts in other fields of endeavor. They are not necessarily a bunch of idiots. I have an uncle who is an expert at Civil War history and who is independently wealthy from his stock market investments (but not from any inherited funds). Yet, he has not been on an airplane since 1996. He would be flummoxed by the TSA procedures. My uncle is a very smart man, very clever and expert in his own world. When it comes to air travel, however, he would be a true "Kettle".

Then there are the DYKWIA who present their Centurion card and expect respect because they have mastered the art of blowing money uselessly. A characteristic of FTers, by contrast, seems to be a desire to get the benefits while paying as little as possible for them. FTers don't seem much like Kettles in any respect to be, nor generally DYKWIA, but many of us most certainly qualify as Gate Lice.

Obviously different people have different notions of Kettle behavior, but I don't see it solely as inexperience. Even first-time flyers have at least some sense of how to be considerate in crowded, shared spaces like airports and airplanes (and TSA procedures can flummox the best of us). True Kettles, in my mind, inexplicably lack this. They're the equivalent of the shopper who parks his cart crosswise in the aisle at a busy supermarket, the escalator rider who stands in the middle with hands resting on both rails, the distracted driver weaving and doing 45 in the carpool lane.

Not realizing that your 3oz liquid bottles have to be in a 1qt resealable bag is forgivable for someone who's never dealt with the TSA; utter lack of common sense and courtesy to fellow travelers, on the other hand, is the hallmark of Kettledom. A nice dose of belligerence doesn't help either.

Definitely agree with this one, I was talking to some friends last night during our pre-drink and I ask my friend who is coming along soon on a trip to not bring any fast food onboard, aka "McDs".
Another friend along side asked why, and I replied "that's because fast food has that distinct oily smell in them and it's not easily getting rid of that smell in the cabin. It usually piss off frequent flyers, myself included who either have to endure that smell because they want it themselves or because it reeks horribly" She replies who cares?

A true kettle if you seen one, at least they are stuck in the 32E on an MD 80 while your in upgraded seat.

A perfect example of the McDonald's Paradox

I'm a huge violator of your rule

i'm a burger and fries guy big time.. prefer Five Guys but will take McD if thats the only option for a B&F to go

Sadly that does work both ways. Some time ago I tried to book a nice little holiday, wanted to take my mother to Noumea for a few days. Organised it with the very confident-sounding travel agent, who got back to me with a lovely, inexpensive package, Sydney to Port Vila for five days, nice hotel etc...
Me: But I want to go to Noumea.
Her: Yes (exasperated sigh from travel agent). Port Vila is the capital of Noumea.
Me: No, Noumea is the capital of New Caledonia. Port Vila is in Vanuatu.
Her: No, *Sir*, Port Vila is the capital of Noumea...(round and round it went...)
I ended up taking my mum to Hong Kong, just seemed so much simpler.

And aren't there some choice surfer terms for such newbies? And aren't there also some rather nasty things that experienced surfers do to the noobs? In comparison, we FF'ers are far more civilized than that!


Maybe he would be a Golden Kettle

That's the difference between an FF'ers and a Kettle - a true FF'er would never let the McD fries go cold, and would eat them in F while they are still hot and golden delicious crisp (usually during boarding, where FF'ers might be able to score a pre-departure beer to go along with the hot and golden delicious crisp fries). A Kettle in Y (or F) would let them get soggy and give off that skanky greasy smell.

Naa. Fast Food is for peons, like "coach" class, obesity, smoking and poor education. Never seen McScheise in F.

No paradox for me; the grease smell (hot OR cold) nauseates me and people bringing on deep fried anything is a really annoying part of flying for me.

Reading over this thread reminds me of Kettle experience that I witnessed in Honolulu on Sunday...

The man, who looks like he is from the mid-west, walks up to the TDC and hands over his ID and what he though was his boarding pass. TDC tells him that he gave her his flight detail page, and not a boarding pass, and needs to go back to the counter. He just stood there for a minute or two, staring at her, until he finally took the papers back from her and went over to the ticket counter to get a boarding pass..

I gotta ask...how does one look like they are from the Midwest?