I was planning to stay away from this one, but I am blown away by the anger that this request has generated.(almost as much as the issue of kids in biz class) I am unsure why a simple "no" was not the approporiate and polte response along with a cordial and educational " that is not how we do things" rather than the diatribe that has become this thread. Shame on us!

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Naxos,

I HIGHLY disagree with you. Shame on YOU for using the word "us". You do not speak for me nor I assume others on this board.

Dorian

No to the request and to many of the above postings.

have a nice weekend!

Sorry, Dorian. while I did not assume to speak for you or any other FT member- I still do not understsand the anger and lack of cordiality woven through this thread. Since the study of human behavior is my livelihood, I am perplexed by this situation. But my humble apology if my statement was interpreted to mean I was speaking for others.

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Call it "unbridled SKEPTICISM!"

Naxos-

As you study human behavior, I'm sure you know that events do not hapen in a vaccuum. People learn from their past experiences, and make assumptions about futures ones based upon those past experiences.

How many people have been burned by selfish people before? How many people would be suspicious if a stranger knocked on your door and told the same story? What if the stranger equivocated about taking any other course of action when suggestions arose?

Blind faith in the inherent goodness and honesty of humanity disappeared a long time ago. I persoanlly save my money and miles for myself, my family, and my friends for a rainy day, and use my resources accordingly. There will come a day, sadly, where I will need these resources for a similar purpose.

I, and other FT's were happy to dispense advice, which was rejected and ignored, and then criticized for being insensitive.

If the behavior shocks you so much, why don't all of you who criticized the reaction on this board band together and send this person to Hawaii instead of just criticizing our decision not to.

Thanks for those who tried to interpret for me. I must not be communicating well. I certainly understand skepticism, even unbridled skepticism. And I do not disagree with a decision, either personal or by consensus, not to honor the request. What I do not understand is the scale of the anger. While any one of us has had experiences, both good and bad, in the past and if it is a given that the request was a scam. why can't one JUST SAY NO! After all, you ( I guess you is the wrong pronoun to use) can't blame a guy for trying.

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naxos,

I have read and re-read this thread a couple of times. Yes I see skepticism and negative feeling about the request . I also see LOTS of advice and suggestions. I do not see the outright anger you refer to. It is just not there.

And as for your suggestion to just say no, some people tried to get more information before they said yes or no.

So here is my answer: No thanks, I don't feel comfortable helping this person out.

Naxos,

Regarding your email to me and the statements above:

I have NO anger towards anyone. "NO" would have been a terrible answer as it explains nothing. The answers above clearly indicate that people feel skeptical and want more information...they also contain information.

I honestly believe this situation was handled very well by FT'ers.

I WOULD LOVE to help anyone out if it was warranted...and other even if not warranted...I am a giving and sharing person...BUT I am not out to be taken advantage of.

If Rudi, Blondebomber, Premex...he*l, even Arturo asked me for something....DONE. When a 1st time poster asks and does not come with 'references' or a really good story (you must admit it was presented poorly)....then I can't help.

Sincerely,

Dorian

p.s. remember, I have no anger in this situation

BoSoxFan45 expressed precisely how I feel about this situation.

If I were the person making the request, I would be checking the boards religiously to see if anyone had any information or help for me. Instead, I have seen a very little presence and response to the help that the FT'ers have offered. I think that it is a tribute to the people that have made suggestions for this person, and that they ought to be recognized rather than chastised for sounding "critical."

Memo to hersheymom, It would not hurt if you posted with a little more frequency to try to validate the genuine-ness of this plight. I like to think of us a generous bunch, but there is absolutely no reason that the good people that have tried to help you are out-working you.

I am sorry if I "sound" inflammatory, but I keep reading this thread and seeing posts by just about everyone- except the person that is trying to garner some assistance.

[This message has been edited by dsimon (edited 06-30-2000).]

This thread has certainly generated a lot of feedback, much of it emotionally charged. Let's remember that, as a group, we are usually VERY civil, even when greeting a topic with skepticism.

I am disturbed that the tone of the thread progressively deteriorates and this causes me personal pain, because I know that WE (all of you and I) are good people. The proof is, so to speak, in the pudding. Can we PUHLEEZE return to civility without flaming and pointing fingers?

Let's all have a safe and joy-filled 4th of July holiday and remember to dwell upon the sacrifices made for the past 200+ years that have given us the freedom to even have a forum like WebFlyer. God Bless you all!

ThanxaBunch,

Spartacus

for the past 200+ only? (the Confoederatio Helvetica was founded 709 years ago as a dicdatorship-fighting democracy ...).

I wish all my US FlyerTalk friends a happy holiday - enjoy your 4th of July! (we swiss will enjoy our 1st of August).

for the past 200+ only? (the Confoederatio Helvetica was founded 709 years ago as a dicdatorship-fighting democracy ...).

I wish all my US FlyerTalk friends a happy holiday - enjoy your 4th of July! (we swiss will enjoy our 1st of August 1291).

Fellow FTers, I guess I misread the posts. I stand corrected and I apologize. The anger I perceived must have been my own. I must need a vacation and coincidently I do not return to work until September.
Happy July 4 and if anyone would like to know a great place from which to watch the DC fireworks, Ill be glad to let you know.

PS I havce been the recipient of the generosity of several FTers which is hat sparked my curiosity. I think I undersatnd now. Dorian- mea culpa

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I would never assume that people would give me anything just for the asking, without first placing myself in their shoes and understanding how they would view my request.
In that respect, the post was not well presented and poorly handled afterwards. This silly- if not suspicious- requirement of having to accrue MILES on such a trip did not help either.

Naxos, don't you think that people reacted so virulently because all those past times when they were asked for $20 in a parking lot so that someone could "take the bus to get back home", they never got to see or talk to the person again when they realized they were taken for a ride?
Here, they finally got to unload that frustrated anger.

My 2c worth ( and that's really all it's worth!) of psycho babble.

If I ever had to do this, this is what I would have posted:

I am really in a bind and I need some help. I am looking for 40,000 miles to visit my dying mother in Hawaii. I cannot afford to pay for the trip and I do not have the miles. I was wondering if a generous soul out there would help me. I understand that this request might look suspicious to you but if you would like to check the veracity of this story, I can give you the telephone number of her doctor who will confirm this to you.
I am sorry for posting this on the board, but you are my last resort to see my dying mother. Can you please help?
Please write at the email in the profile if you have questions or if you can help.