Here's what happens on the website when you are 1k and pre-ordering. Per earlier comments in this thread you should not be charged, even though the items show a charge as you select. Trying this for my upcoming flight (first timer)...
https://cimg7.ibsrv.net/gimg/www.fly...d85874a821.png

So it looks like UA is not using your stored credit card by default for your on board purchase anymore - good.

That said, I have been improperly charged multiple times already.

First time flying international economy in a while. Can I get a free spirit beyond the beer or wine?

I never had spirits refused flying international. But what they have available depends on the route and time of year. My last flight they were out of vodka

CLE-IAH-LAS earlier this week. The FA on CLE-IAH actually proactively asked me if I wanted anything to eat. First time I've seen that. IAH-LAS was back to me having to ask. But the important thing is...I got my Takeoff box.

If I as a 1K am traveling with a guest on the same reservation, will they also get a free item?

Simply... no.

I routinely skip the snack and let my wife have mine.

No, unless you gifted them status as a MM Companion.

I asked for a snack box along with my meal in PE. The FA initially misunderstood, and gave me the snack box instead of the meal.

YMMV - it was announced prior to the start of meal/cart service, there was trainees on the flight.

Wonder if I could have asked for the burger and have the PE meal (same disgusting meal as J)? :D

The burger is better than anything in J these days.

officially, no.

however, IME when requesting a drink or food item as 1K the FA has ALWAYS asked whether my GM travel partner should like something. have NEVER been charged.

same. never been questioned or charged.

was in Y from MUC last week and ordered a spirit. FA immediately asked if i was a 1k (no phone; he seemed to know) and handed it over. PAX beside me asked for the same and was reminded that "beer and wine are free and spirits are available at a charge".

happened to me recently, too. really nice older FA asked me if i wanted anything. i declined. when she came around again she reminded me : "just let me know if you change your mind or came back to the galley". so nice.

i have been noticing that FAs are more ofter aware of the 1k/GS in the cabin from the beginning of the flight. purser welcome on board greetings, proactively offering snack/drink, not even mentioning a charge when you order something before even looking at the app, etc.

No

I flew in coach 7 times in the last week. On those flights, not one FA proactively offered me my 1K benefit, and one FA even refused to give me a BOB item without charging my CC (I didn't escalate it to the purser because I didn't want to make a scene and seem like an overly-entitled jerk). I guess it's just poor training because there is no shortage of 1Ks sitting in Y these days.