Ok, it's not friday, but in the former colonies, we think of it as friday as we prepare to celebrate the feast of suckering the injuns into thinking they could trust the white man...

Why is it, when you purchase a ticket, check-in, request an upgrade, etc, that it seems like the CS agent has to type a novel on his/her keyboard just to tell the computer that you prefer an aisle seat.

I was wondering this at the Useless Scareways city office a couple days ago when the lady was happily transcribing War and Peace into her computer to tell it that there was a lost ticket floating about.

I asked her why she was typing so much, and she was evasive, saying that the system required codes and such for shorthand(!) purposes. Anyone here ever get a straight answer as to what the heck they are REALLY typing (my parinoid mind imagines they are rating us on appearance, fashion sense and politeness, which they feed into a central computer which tells the FAs whether or not to give us a choice of meals in 1st class)...or, better yet, ever been a CS agent??

Seems like an enormous waste of keystrokes to me, but, again, what the heck do I know...

To quote Mel Brooks: "Work, work, work, work."

I have seen this at airline ticket counters,
hotel check in stands, car rental stands,
department stores, any stores, etc.

I have some possible answers:

*PremEx's and an added one... they have to do something.
*An outdated computer program.
*A secret series of codes to see if FF-ers will get upgraded (Hit the Z key if we don't
want to upgrade this person for example)
*They are answering e-mail from a friend.
*They keep hitting keys until they find the right program.
*They like the rat tat tat sound of the keyboard. (IT sure beats the AY EE OH AN KNEE Chanting of those annoying Delta children!)

One solution: Why not just code our ff and
hotel and car rental cards with all this info, just swipe the card and POOF there's
enough information that they can rest their
fingers and avoid carpel Tunnel Syndrome (sorry if I spelled it wrong!)

FUNNY posting, Matt. CATMAN

It's actually a big plot. The airlines want you to spend as much time in front of agents, clerks, baggage handlers, gate personnel, etc to give you lots of opportunities to prove that you are not you. No more advance boarding passes, no more tickets with initials only, all of those ID checks - they just don't want their tickets re-sold or given away.

I have noticed though that with e-tickets (as long as you have a seat assignment and/or upgrade ahead of time) the process is extermely fast. I checked into an international flight (where AA has in my profile my Passport # etc...) in under 3 minutes (including checking a bag)-- I was amazed.

(Of course it is a different story entirely if you have your tickets, need to process an upgrade for which you have a seat assignment but you are redeeming a certificate that is already in your possession but that has not been entered into the computer. In that case, bring a book -- you will be there for a while!)

JIMBO... That is true about the e-tickets.
In fact, that is true (when lines are short)
at the UA first class and Premier counters.
I am normally done in about 3-4 minutes.

If you are using a certificate I would warn
the reservations person you are calling to
CONFIRM your tickets before leaving that you
have an upgrade certificate and have them put it in the system so the agent can find it quickly.

ANOTHER CAT TIP: While waiting on the line:
Get the ticket, your FF card and I-D out
early and hand it all to the agent. Also
if you plan to use upgrade certificates have them handy to just rip them and get on your way.

Of course for any of this to work there should be enough agents at the special windows and lines not dragged out with EVERY
level of ff member. (I babbled on separate check-ins before!) CATMAN

my polite answer: they love you (the costumer) and don't want to get rid of you to fast.

the truth: lack of know-how of the person doing it.

Aw com'on guys, they are on the net checking out your FlyerTalk postings. The next time OL' Tom walks up to the counter and they see cat hair, the CS agent is going to say "Are you really Catman, with over a million posts on FlyerTalk"? "So, Mr. Catman, where is Catwoman"?

NJDavid: No, it's not to prove it's not you. There's an old, old restaurant scheme (scam?}: If the place is full, serve them fast and get them out to make room; if the the place is empty, serve them slow to make it look like it's busy. If the lines are long, it looks like the airline is popular. If they're short, it looks like they're not. Actually, most airlines are filling up big time, and there's no reason to hoke things up.

Have you been to CO counters at terminal C at EWR? There are Elite lines, checking baggage lines, tickets only lines, international only lines, and some "by corporate arrangement" special lines.

Doesn't matter - everybody goes everywhere..it's always crowded...simple things take 15 minutes, complex ticketing takes 45 minutes.

This isn't because they want to look busy, it's because people do not have a choice but to wait.

Very true. I almost have anxiety attacks when I ask for my upgrades. I try to read her (his) body language and facial expressions to see if I could detect any sign of hope. All I hear are those old clacks from their keyboards that remind me so much of computer labs in college. And have you seen their keyboards? Each key has about 4 other functions.

NJ David... you are absolutely right about
Continental. They have a line of check in gates that stretch on forever. Even with the special elite and international check in lines that place is TOTAL Chaos (SP) at 10:15 in the morning as it is at 11 p-m at night. It seems that half the agents are over there having little chat sessions while
Two agents are actually serving people! (sorry Jaws43 but maybe it's better if you are elite!)

My solution: I get those e-tickets go up to the machine and in two minutes I have a cash register receipt that's my ticket. Don't like waiting in line if there's another way out.

I guess every checkin is slow. If it takes more than ten minutes my "cat hair" stands on end...

Speaking of that... JAWS43: I would faint if
anyone recognized me. And at this moment there is no CATWOMAN in my life (the other's married to the creator of Ally McBeal and still is beautiful at 41!) CATMAN

Speaking of lines, I FINALLY received an upgrade from an E-Ticket Machine last week. My first ever. I went to the machine to avoid the long check-in line at the Elite/FC
counter, and lo and behold, the ETM said "Upgrades available on this flight". Faint!!!

Catman, you cannot be any older than Catwoman! Vonda Shepherd ain't bad, either.

Most airlines use SITA systems, which are not windows-based, and are less than intuitive to use. (http://www.sita.int/)

Even seasoned IT professionals have been known to crumble and cry when required to input a string of cryptic commands... it is very easy to make a mistake/do things the hard way...
don't blame the poor operators!

i hates cripton comands. i luvs saterdays.