Jul 14, 2015, 2:48 pm
Last edit by: BadgerBoi
The Definitive Guide to Seat Poaching
1. Don't do it.
2. Alternatively to #1: Asking politely (and not demanding) to swap for an equal or better seat is acceptable by most (but the final decision always lays with the original seat holder)...but, be warned, some FT'ers may breathe fire at you.
3. Keep in mind that Point 2 is not seat poaching.
1. Don't do it.
2. Alternatively to #1: Asking politely (and not demanding) to swap for an equal or better seat is acceptable by most (but the final decision always lays with the original seat holder)...but, be warned, some FT'ers may breathe fire at you.
3. Keep in mind that Point 2 is not seat poaching.
Seat Swapping, Seat Poaching and Seating Etiquette: The Definitive Thread
Sep 29, 2014, 1:30 pm
#241
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Wow, I hope she didn't become that guy's wife. Not wanting her to sit next to a male in public is far too possessive to the point of being potentially dangerous.
Sep 29, 2014, 1:55 pm
#242
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Just recently I got to my seat to find it occupied. I said "Oh there must be some mistake." like normal. But this time instead of asking politely, the husband of the woman that was in my seat just pointed. The wife didn't even so much as acknowledge me. And I said "Oh, I guess by pointing you would like me to sit there instead." I didn't really have any reason not to switch so I did, but of course I tried to make my point without causing a scene. It was shockingly rude. No "Please" or "Thank you." Just pointing.
On a related story, I had a flight earlier this year when I had the window and the husband offered me his wife's middle seat on the other side of the aisle. I respectfully declined and I ended up talking to the guy most of the flight. At one point, he said he actually preferred sitting next to me and not his wife but felt obligated to ask for his wife. I think many spouses feel the same way. After a long trip, they might not want to sit together but they feel like they should. In some cases, refusing to move is probably the best thing that could happen for them.
Sep 29, 2014, 2:04 pm
#243
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I also had a nonrev grab my seat (about 4 years ago). When he saw my intentions to claim my seat, he asked if I could switch seats. I told him I had selected it in advance because of a personal preference with that seat, his answer was that his personal preference was not having another man sitting by his girlfriend (Also with a big bold NRSA in the BP). It turned out that his girlfriend was not even in the right seat.
O/H, who will likely, if asked politely, move to a comparable seat.
Sep 29, 2014, 2:26 pm
#244
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For the OP, I wonder if the seat poacher first asked the FA about switching, thus the reason they went ahead and sat there instead of taking their assigned seat.
If I could think fast enough, and given the seats in this instance were equivalent, I might have said. I am happy to switch but in future it really would be nice if you first took your assigned seat and then asked to switch. Seat poaching tends to be a put off and is considered rude by most.
If I could think fast enough, and given the seats in this instance were equivalent, I might have said. I am happy to switch but in future it really would be nice if you first took your assigned seat and then asked to switch. Seat poaching tends to be a put off and is considered rude by most.
Sep 29, 2014, 2:48 pm
#245
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^
Sep 29, 2014, 2:48 pm
#246
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For the OP, I wonder if the seat poacher first asked the FA about switching, thus the reason they went ahead and sat there instead of taking their assigned seat.
If I could think fast enough, and given the seats in this instance were equivalent, I might have said. I am happy to switch but in future it really would be nice if you first took your assigned seat and then asked to switch. Seat poaching tends to be a put off and is considered rude by most.
If I could think fast enough, and given the seats in this instance were equivalent, I might have said. I am happy to switch but in future it really would be nice if you first took your assigned seat and then asked to switch. Seat poaching tends to be a put off and is considered rude by most.
.
Sep 29, 2014, 2:53 pm
#247
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On my last flight, I walked on the plane and immediately noticed somebody was in my seat. I just mentioned this to the FA and showed him my boarding pass (and my status). He said that he would take care of the seating. Didn't have to say one word to the poacher.
Sep 29, 2014, 3:01 pm
#248
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On an Air France flight from BUD to CDG I had booked 1C because it had extra legroom due to the position of the bulkhead. Passenger in 1B wanted me to swap so he could be next to his spouse in 1D. Passenger was Hungarian and I do not speak Hungarian. FA came up and addressed me in French. Sorry, do not speak that either. I then said in English that I booked the seat for a reason and why don't they ask the person sitting next to the Husband (in 1A) if he would switch with 1D. That person did not mind since 1C/1D had more space than 1A/1B. People I was traveling with were in 2A/2B (they do not like bulkheads as they do not like to have to go up to the overhead bin any time they need to access their carry-on baggage) heard the whole thing and afterwards agreed with me and were surprised I was more civil than saying ".... you leave me alone"
Sep 29, 2014, 3:04 pm
#249
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And I've shared this one before, but for those of us who remember the old PMDL domestic 764s, seats 7E&F had a mile of extra legroom as they were crew rest seats. And to top it off there was a secret control, which I call the Way-Back Lever, allowing you extra extra recline, since there was a lot of space between the seat and the bulkhead wall behind.
Needless to say those seats were very sought-after, and I purposely chose flights just to get one of those seats.
So imagine my surprise when one day I went to board and got to seat 7F to find it occupied. The husband said that he wanted to sit next to his wife in 7E so wouldn't I mind taking his seat instead. I politely declined. Interestingly Wife stayed in 7E and didn't offer to switch with the person next to her husband. Hmmmmm......
So another point of etiquette, if you want to swap seats to be next to someone, you need to be the person willing to accept a lesser quality seat, not the person you are asking to switch with.
In terms of being considerate of others, you'd think this would be obvious but apparently it's not.
Sep 29, 2014, 3:06 pm
#250
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The deal: I was on a paid F ticket and had the the pick of the cabin when it was purchased - middle cabin, window- all good. I was the last F pax to board the plane and when I came to my row, a guy was already sitting and settled in my seat. Immediately, the flight attendant approached and asked if I could take his seat in 2B (aisle) so that he could sit next to his wife. Without much comment and to avoid anything awkward, I trudge to 2B and quietly fume that someone had the gall to sit in another person's seat- I WOULD NEVER do that.
If it was a free upgrade and the seat assignment was random, I wouldn't care (as much) but because I paid for and chose this seat, I was bothered that the flight attendant was complicit in this scheme. It's one thing if I was in the seat and perhaps the wife or the husband politely asked if I wouldnt; mind changing seats so they could sit together, but to not have a say in the matter is what bugged me. Also, its one thing if the seat swap was like for like but to ask someone to move from window to aisle or vice versa in a further up row near the galley was pretty bold imho.
I know this has happened to folks here and just wandering if they get perturbed like me of don't care at all.
If it was a free upgrade and the seat assignment was random, I wouldn't care (as much) but because I paid for and chose this seat, I was bothered that the flight attendant was complicit in this scheme. It's one thing if I was in the seat and perhaps the wife or the husband politely asked if I wouldnt; mind changing seats so they could sit together, but to not have a say in the matter is what bugged me. Also, its one thing if the seat swap was like for like but to ask someone to move from window to aisle or vice versa in a further up row near the galley was pretty bold imho.
I know this has happened to folks here and just wandering if they get perturbed like me of don't care at all.
Sep 29, 2014, 3:13 pm
#251
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I had a similar situation many years ago where a woman asked me to switch my window seat for her sister's aisle seat. It was a TATL flight and I wanted the window seat to sleep and relax better. So I declined, and she acted put out by that. Now I would think if it was so important to sit next to her sister, then I'm sure that the guy in middle seat next to her sister would have gladly traded places with her. But apparently it wasn't that important.
And I've shared this one before, but for those of us who remember the old PMDL domestic 764s, seats 7E&F had a mile of extra legroom as they were crew rest seats. And to top it off there was a secret control, which I call the Way-Back Lever, allowing you extra extra recline, since there was a lot of space between the seat and the bulkhead wall behind.
Needless to say those seats were very sought-after, and I purposely chose flights just to get one of those seats.
So imagine my surprise when one day I went to board and got to seat 7F to find it occupied. The husband said that he wanted to sit next to his wife in 7E so wouldn't I mind taking his seat instead. I politely declined. Interestingly Wife stayed in 7E and didn't offer to switch with the person next to her husband. Hmmmmm......
So another point of etiquette, if you want to swap seats to be next to someone, you need to be the person willing to accept a lesser quality seat, not the person you are asking to switch with.
In terms of being considerate of others, you'd think this would be obvious but apparently it's not.
And I've shared this one before, but for those of us who remember the old PMDL domestic 764s, seats 7E&F had a mile of extra legroom as they were crew rest seats. And to top it off there was a secret control, which I call the Way-Back Lever, allowing you extra extra recline, since there was a lot of space between the seat and the bulkhead wall behind.
Needless to say those seats were very sought-after, and I purposely chose flights just to get one of those seats.
So imagine my surprise when one day I went to board and got to seat 7F to find it occupied. The husband said that he wanted to sit next to his wife in 7E so wouldn't I mind taking his seat instead. I politely declined. Interestingly Wife stayed in 7E and didn't offer to switch with the person next to her husband. Hmmmmm......
So another point of etiquette, if you want to swap seats to be next to someone, you need to be the person willing to accept a lesser quality seat, not the person you are asking to switch with.
In terms of being considerate of others, you'd think this would be obvious but apparently it's not.
Sep 29, 2014, 3:39 pm
#252
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You were a gentlemen. When I chose a seat I prefer, I want it. I have already said -I requested this seat, please take your assigned seat.
In this case you might have wanted to "view" the wife. She could have made your flight really miserable! You could have lucked out.
In this case you might have wanted to "view" the wife. She could have made your flight really miserable! You could have lucked out.
Sep 29, 2014, 4:19 pm
#253
Join Date: Jul 2014
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I also had a nonrev grab my seat (about 4 years ago). When he saw my intentions to claim my seat, he asked if I could switch seats. I told him I had selected it in advance because of a personal preference with that seat, his answer was that his personal preference was not having another man sitting by his girlfriend (Also with a big bold NRSA in the BP). It turned out that his girlfriend was not even in the right seat.
MSPeconomist, you are definitely on fire today!
Whenever I run into this situation, I don't confront the seat jumper. I go to the FA, tell them that someone is sitting in my seat (and show them my boarding pass), and let them handle it.
Sep 29, 2014, 4:21 pm
#254
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Sep 29, 2014, 4:30 pm
#255
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On a related story, I had a flight earlier this year when I had the window and the husband offered me his wife's middle seat on the other side of the aisle. I respectfully declined and I ended up talking to the guy most of the flight. At one point, he said he actually preferred sitting next to me and not his wife but felt obligated to ask for his wife. I think many spouses feel the same way. After a long trip, they might not want to sit together but they feel like they should. In some cases, refusing to move is probably the best thing that could happen for them.
But for the rest of the stories in this thread... yeah, you can't fix stupid...