Inappropriate Comments by Strangers...advice needed
 

I am hoping the FT community can help me. I am currently enjoying my delay in ANC and was eating in the terminal when this guy that had been sitting at the next table strikes up a conversation. Since I have 3+ hours of waiting I chatted with him for a bit.

Now I am a big guy, and he finally gets around to the point. He basically was criticizing my choice of meals and how it apparently wasn't healthy enough, and I "didn't need to be eating that." I was pretty shocked that this stranger was giving me a lecture. He wouldn't let up on it and I was trying to get my check and get the heck out of there. I was finally able to leave and I basically responded by informing him that I do maintain healthy habits (exercise daily etc.) and that what I ate was my choice.

I actually regret the way I did it, i.e. "defend" myself to him. I am of the opinion that our choices are our own, and whether we agree with the choices others make or not, we need to keep our opinions to ourself. How would you have responded to this?

(I just hope this guy does not end up sitting next to me on my flight.)

Dan

Just shrug it off and move on. You can't let little things like that get to you.

I've been out right insulted hundred's of times when I've just been minding my own business, not during traveling mind you (I'm 23, and this was back in high school, but still). Stuff like this just rolls off me like rain.

Just forget it, like you said, he's a stranger and doesn't even know you.

That probably would have bothered me also and I am sure I would have said something like "you wear an ugly jacket but I don't tell you how to dress", but this is really stupid and the best line here is to say nothing and walk away.

Disagree. This person had no right to offer up criticism to a perfect stranger (the OP). I would have told him that what I do is none of his concern and to please STFU so I could enjoy my meal in peace.

Here in Israel, everyone is a busy-body. it is the national pasttime. i do whatever i am in the mood to do--tell him to STFU, defend myself, etc. i don't think there is a right-wrong here, just an uncomfortable-less uncomfortable.

Well, that is what I usually say but then it doesn't feel good at all. People that say stupid insensitive things are just stupid and insensitive and there is nothing you can say that will make them smarter.

Sounds like the same approach of some of the Bible Pushers I've run accross. Change the topic to food and it's still just as offensive.

Long ago I learned, what other people think of me is none of my business. I wouldn't sweat it.

"No-way man.. I AM NOT going to go to the restroom and [edited]!! Hey! Somebody call the cops!"

Usually works a treat :D

Oh that is wonderful ^ :D ^

There are food Nazis everywhere. When I was a bone thin teenager total strangers used to come up to me and tell me I should eat more, even lecture me about it. And yet if I sat at a park and ate a cream cake (which was normal, I had an enormous appetite at that age and all the will in the world to sate it... I hated being so thin), more often than not someone walking past would say "don't eat that, you'll get fat".

If I'd been within earshot and realised what this guy was saying to you as a stranger I probably would have laid into him myself. A high ranking nun at my school (Deputy Head) took it on herself to diagnose me with anorexia - caused me a world of trouble - some people should really mind their own business.

If it happens again, tell the next person to go #%¥* themself. And remember that thin people can get this crap too... so please don't give the fact that he targeted you a second thought. He sounds like a moral bully. You don't 'need' to cook your food either, or use spices, or make it delicious in any way, in fact, you don't 'need' the great majority of the things that make life worth living.

"I wonder which would be easier - for me to lose weight, or for you to learn to mind your own business?"

I doubt I'd have the nerve to say it, though.

My favorite retort when strangers have commented on my appearance, weight, accent or whatever is: "Do you have to work at being so rude, or does it just come naturally?"

Another view
 

I've noticed that my health insurance will almost double, to $610 monthly for a single individual. I work out, eat healthy, get good sleep. Never in a hospital. My payment subsidize Americans unhealthy lifestyles.
I don't like it, but I keep my mouth shut.
Forget him, and forget about the hurt.
Give your family a gift: a healthy dad with a long, healthy retirement. Be around for your grandkids.
Its a choice we each need to make.

I remember when I was about 5 months pregnant with my second kid (it was obvious I was pregnant since I was wearing maternity clothes) and was eating a few Tootsie Rolls while waiting for my flight, some guy said to me, "You keep eating those and you'll get even fatter." I looked right at him and ate another Tootsie Roll or two. He looked away first.

Thanks, I'm looking for a new nutritionist, do you have a card? Where is your practice based?

Oh, you're not a doctor? Did you stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night?