Canadian Girlfriend got seriously hassled before entering US this time
Jan 6, 2011, 3:26 am
#151
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Southeast USA
Programs: various
Posts: 6,710
Katie, welcome to FT. Don't worry about the above comments about "normal, white". I get the issue, and I didn't find anything offensive in your post. If you had left out that verbiage, someone surely would have come back and asked "is the boyfriend a person of color?" It's no secret border agents everywhere (not just Canada or USSA) often make prejudgments based on skin color--rightly or wrongly. At least we know in your boyfriend's case, race was not part of the situational equation.
Not sure if it will help you, but Canadian Consulates in the USA:
http://www.canadainternational.gc.ca...aux/index.aspx
Not sure if it will help you, but Canadian Consulates in the USA:
http://www.canadainternational.gc.ca...aux/index.aspx
Jan 6, 2011, 7:20 pm
#152
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: On the wrong side of the border obviously..
Posts: 6
Katie, welcome to FT. Don't worry about the above comments about "normal, white". I get the issue, and I didn't find anything offensive in your post. If you had left out that verbiage, someone surely would have come back and asked "is the boyfriend a person of color?" It's no secret border agents everywhere (not just Canada or USSA) often make prejudgments based on skin color--rightly or wrongly. At least we know in your boyfriend's case, race was not part of the situational equation.
Not sure if it will help you, but Canadian Consulates in the USA:
http://www.canadainternational.gc.ca...aux/index.aspx
Not sure if it will help you, but Canadian Consulates in the USA:
http://www.canadainternational.gc.ca...aux/index.aspx
^ I am checking out the link now! Thanks! Also referring my boyfriend to this forum as well. I also gave him the info of who to contact from that list and put it on his forums so he will see it.
When talking to the Canadian Consulate is it okay for him to say I am his fiance or should he just refer to me as a friend?
Last edited by Kiwi Flyer; Jan 15, 2011 at 10:06 pm Reason: merge consecutive posts
Jan 6, 2011, 11:43 pm
#153
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: DTW, TPE or somewhere in between
Programs: Delta (SkyTeam) Plat, Hyatt GP Diamond, HH Diamond
Posts: 66
I would just go with girlfriend. If he says fiance, they will then question whether you plan to get married in Canada as a way for him to stay there and work.
Jan 7, 2011, 4:12 am
#154
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,972
Jan 7, 2011, 8:42 am
#155
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: PDX
Posts: 908
Originally Posted by nachtnebel
Speaking from experience in the Vancouver area, on the Canadian side, the immigration folks are not terribly welcoming to Americans (exactly the opposite, they seem to be very suspicious)
Jan 8, 2011, 9:22 am
#156
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: On the wrong side of the border obviously..
Posts: 6
Ha, I noticed that too - when I used to travel to Canada with my GC, the border agents were OK and sometimes even quite nice. When I naturalised and started to travel on the US passport, they started to treat me quite differently. It got to the point that now I favour CBP agents slightly more than CBSA agents
Jan 8, 2011, 12:49 pm
#157
Suspended
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Doha, Qatar
Programs: Air Canada Aeroplan, Lufthansa Miles & More, Flying Blue, Hyatt Gold Passport
Posts: 1,894
I guess one of the many annoying things about the CBP is their apparent expectation that all couples follow their neat little relationship development programme. In their view people are supposed to transition from "dating" to "engaged" to "married" and keep the visa status in conformance at all times.
My longest monogamous relationship lasted 17 years, much longer than most of my friends' marriages. We never had any sort of legal document that confirmed our commitment to each other. So what? It's just unbelievable that the CBP thinks they can "bless" certain relationships based on the degree to which you follow their prescribed views about how such things work. But my choice of a different route doesn't mean that I have less right to a happy relationship free of harassment by Federal agents than anyone else.
My longest monogamous relationship lasted 17 years, much longer than most of my friends' marriages. We never had any sort of legal document that confirmed our commitment to each other. So what? It's just unbelievable that the CBP thinks they can "bless" certain relationships based on the degree to which you follow their prescribed views about how such things work. But my choice of a different route doesn't mean that I have less right to a happy relationship free of harassment by Federal agents than anyone else.
Jan 9, 2011, 7:52 pm
#158
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: On the wrong side of the border obviously..
Posts: 6
we've been together since 2005 and are trying to follow the rules .. but they don't exactly make the rules very clear.
My Spanish friend said he knows a guy in South USA who is marrying a Canadian girl and says to talk to him (just got the email at the same time as the notification of a reply here just now). It is not that we wouldn't do what ever it takes .. it is just that it seems it can only be done if you are rich.. with the little information we have been told being that you need $10,000 to live in Canada when you were an American and need to get sponsored (which I can't) .. but before I get into all those details I guess I should start my own thread huh?
My Spanish friend said he knows a guy in South USA who is marrying a Canadian girl and says to talk to him (just got the email at the same time as the notification of a reply here just now). It is not that we wouldn't do what ever it takes .. it is just that it seems it can only be done if you are rich.. with the little information we have been told being that you need $10,000 to live in Canada when you were an American and need to get sponsored (which I can't) .. but before I get into all those details I guess I should start my own thread huh?
Jan 10, 2011, 4:37 pm
#159
Original Poster
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 27
I have some info and updates
To give my experience on a couple of recent issues:
When visiting my girlfriend in Canada, I never said I was in a relationship. I always said "visiting friends". This was also true, because I was visiting a wonderful little circle of friends there, I just happened to be sleeping with one of them.
When my girlfriend was visiting me here, she divulged the relationship which helped to insure she had many horrible interrogations, as described in this thread. They were either badgering her about attempts to immigrate here via her relationship with me, or determined to make her confess that she worked here during her frequent visits.
On her Christmas visit to be with me, as many of you predicted, she received her first wave-through in months, with no interrogations about her holiday stay.
And of course the irony of all the CBP harassment is that this last time she was here I decided to marry her, because we are in love, but also partly to avoid all the trouble with the customs officials. I have been tempted to write an open letter to CBP thanking them for making my relationship with her seem wrong and forbidden in their authoritarian eyes, and therefore very exciting and hot.
When visiting my girlfriend in Canada, I never said I was in a relationship. I always said "visiting friends". This was also true, because I was visiting a wonderful little circle of friends there, I just happened to be sleeping with one of them.
When my girlfriend was visiting me here, she divulged the relationship which helped to insure she had many horrible interrogations, as described in this thread. They were either badgering her about attempts to immigrate here via her relationship with me, or determined to make her confess that she worked here during her frequent visits.
On her Christmas visit to be with me, as many of you predicted, she received her first wave-through in months, with no interrogations about her holiday stay.
And of course the irony of all the CBP harassment is that this last time she was here I decided to marry her, because we are in love, but also partly to avoid all the trouble with the customs officials. I have been tempted to write an open letter to CBP thanking them for making my relationship with her seem wrong and forbidden in their authoritarian eyes, and therefore very exciting and hot.
Jan 10, 2011, 10:07 pm
#160
Join Date: May 2006
Location: MYF/CMA/SAN/YYZ/YKF
Programs: COdbaUA 1K MM, AA EXP, Bonbon Gold, GHA Titanium, Hertz PC, NEXUS and GE
Posts: 5,839
Honestly, the best way to deal with all of this is to get NEXUS. Both my girlfriend (Canadian) and I (American) are bothered significantly less.
Jan 11, 2011, 5:28 am
#161
Suspended
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Doha, Qatar
Programs: Air Canada Aeroplan, Lufthansa Miles & More, Flying Blue, Hyatt Gold Passport
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Every thread about getting hassled, somebody suggests "NEXUS" or other similar programmes. Sorry, but completely surrendering all of your privacy rights is not a solution to anything.
Jan 11, 2011, 7:41 am
#162
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: RDU
Programs: AA GM, DL DM, DSC
Posts: 1,540
Congratulations AtariBaby on your engagement.
As a Canadian living in the US for 14 years now I have many experiences crossing the U.S./Canada border.
My worst experiences early on were when I was on an H1 visa crossing at YOW. Without fail, I consistently would be pulled into the CBP office. It got to the point I had to avoid the 6 AM flights because they didn't open the airport until 5 AM and that wasn't enough time to get through security then sit in the CBP office for an hour. I started to bring a book with me which seemed to tick them off so they would hold me until my flight was closing the door. Many times the only question they would ask me is "what time does your flight leave?". That was literally the only question they asked me sometimes. I would eventually be released and after running to the gate usually would make my flight although a handful of times I repeated the process the next day as there was only 1 daily flight leaving late morning. It became easier to drive across the border and fly from a US airport. I never had any such hassles driving across the border but CBP @ YOW was a real PITA those years.
Initially I was on a TN visa and didn't have any hassles. Something about the H1 visa triggered the extra process. Now that I am a permanent resident I have few issues with CBP. In fact now entering Canada tends to be more work with more questions & more hassles. I have always found this interesting as I remain a Canadian citizen and enter on my Canadian passport while also presenting my U.S. PR card yet I get drilled with questions by Canadian officials. Coming home to the US now tends to be easier often ending with the CBP agent saying "welcome home".
Now when visiting family in Canada I fly to BUF and drive across to Southern Ontario. I see a lot of Canadian passports @ BUF. My family tells me a lot of Canadians have learned to avoid using Canadian airports to fly to the U.S. although I don't think it is due to CBP but the current security process for flights to the U.S.
Good luck and congratulations.
As a Canadian living in the US for 14 years now I have many experiences crossing the U.S./Canada border.
My worst experiences early on were when I was on an H1 visa crossing at YOW. Without fail, I consistently would be pulled into the CBP office. It got to the point I had to avoid the 6 AM flights because they didn't open the airport until 5 AM and that wasn't enough time to get through security then sit in the CBP office for an hour. I started to bring a book with me which seemed to tick them off so they would hold me until my flight was closing the door. Many times the only question they would ask me is "what time does your flight leave?". That was literally the only question they asked me sometimes. I would eventually be released and after running to the gate usually would make my flight although a handful of times I repeated the process the next day as there was only 1 daily flight leaving late morning. It became easier to drive across the border and fly from a US airport. I never had any such hassles driving across the border but CBP @ YOW was a real PITA those years.
Initially I was on a TN visa and didn't have any hassles. Something about the H1 visa triggered the extra process. Now that I am a permanent resident I have few issues with CBP. In fact now entering Canada tends to be more work with more questions & more hassles. I have always found this interesting as I remain a Canadian citizen and enter on my Canadian passport while also presenting my U.S. PR card yet I get drilled with questions by Canadian officials. Coming home to the US now tends to be easier often ending with the CBP agent saying "welcome home".
Now when visiting family in Canada I fly to BUF and drive across to Southern Ontario. I see a lot of Canadian passports @ BUF. My family tells me a lot of Canadians have learned to avoid using Canadian airports to fly to the U.S. although I don't think it is due to CBP but the current security process for flights to the U.S.
Good luck and congratulations.
Jan 11, 2011, 5:23 pm
#163
Original Poster
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 27
Regarding the NEXUS advice, it is excellent advice, and I have one, although it's not for everyone. My fiance is unable to reconstruct her multi-year residential and employment information as required-- she has worked and lived in too many places, and at times not worked, and the form doesn't allow gaps (!), and she's unwilling to lie as always, so she is an example of someone who can't qualify for a NEXUS card.
Jan 11, 2011, 6:59 pm
#164
Join Date: May 2006
Location: MYF/CMA/SAN/YYZ/YKF
Programs: COdbaUA 1K MM, AA EXP, Bonbon Gold, GHA Titanium, Hertz PC, NEXUS and GE
Posts: 5,839
Didn't notice the engagement part. Congrats.
1) I disagree that enrolling in "NEXUS" (as you put it) is a complete surrender of privacy rights. Governments do background checks all the time, not under the scope of any program. Just look at all the stories of the Canadians pulling up 15 year old DUIs to extract a "rehabilitation" fee from unwitting Yanks.
2) I had to live scan my fingerprints years ago. First, so I could have a summer job on my dad's car dealership, then so I could obtain the license to practice in my profession. In fact, I found out that the Canadians had access to my fingerprints (or at least that I had fingerprints taken) back in 2005, before I had even considered NEXUS.
3) In many ways, I surrender less of my privacy rights than you or someone else who doesn't have NEXUS or GE does, as I am far less likely to have my belongings searched at the border. I got thanked for paying duty last week on an overage because the CBP agent admitted that they would almost never check a GE person for such a thing. Indeed, one of the biggest reasons for getting GE was to avoid the disgusting behavior of so many bigoted, jingoistic CBP agents.
So yeah. Pick another fight.
2) I had to live scan my fingerprints years ago. First, so I could have a summer job on my dad's car dealership, then so I could obtain the license to practice in my profession. In fact, I found out that the Canadians had access to my fingerprints (or at least that I had fingerprints taken) back in 2005, before I had even considered NEXUS.
3) In many ways, I surrender less of my privacy rights than you or someone else who doesn't have NEXUS or GE does, as I am far less likely to have my belongings searched at the border. I got thanked for paying duty last week on an overage because the CBP agent admitted that they would almost never check a GE person for such a thing. Indeed, one of the biggest reasons for getting GE was to avoid the disgusting behavior of so many bigoted, jingoistic CBP agents.
So yeah. Pick another fight.
Jan 12, 2011, 6:49 pm
#165
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Toronto, Canada
Programs: HH Diamond, Marriott Gold
Posts: 1,363