To give my experience on a couple of recent issues:
When visiting my girlfriend in Canada, I never said I was in a relationship. I always said "visiting friends". This was also true, because I was visiting a wonderful little circle of friends there, I just happened to be sleeping with one of them.
When my girlfriend was visiting me here, she divulged the relationship which helped to insure she had many horrible interrogations, as described in this thread. They were either badgering her about attempts to immigrate here via her relationship with me, or determined to make her confess that she worked here during her frequent visits.
On her Christmas visit to be with me, as many of you predicted, she received her first wave-through in months, with no interrogations about her holiday stay.
And of course the irony of all the CBP harassment is that this last time she was here I decided to marry her, because we are in love, but also partly to avoid all the trouble with the customs officials. I have been tempted to write an open letter to CBP thanking them for making my relationship with her seem wrong and forbidden in their authoritarian eyes, and therefore very exciting and hot.
