Visconti

You know, now that you mention it, the last time I was at Wolfgang's steakhouse, the one on 8th Ave, the bill included a mandatory 18% tip, even when I was there dining by myself. While I had no qualms with it and can't ever recall seeing this before, I generally tip more here and always in cash. In this case, they cost their staff some extra dough.

Blumie

I totally understand the sentiment, but I don’t personally think it’s appropriate to take it out on the staff.

Separately, there’s a significant debate about tipping in cash vs by card. It shouldn’t matter in terms of the size of the tip — I’ve never heard the card fee being charged to the waitstaff — but many feel it puts money in their pocket more quickly and maybe impacts their tax burden. (Not sure; is that still the case?) The flip side is that it often allows staff members to screw their colleagues; most NYC restaurants split tips among servers, and if one tips in cash, it allows a server to slip it in their pocket rather than add it to the tip pool.

I don’t know what the right answer is. I usually tip by card.

Visconti

While I'm sure it's a worthy discussion, this is just one of those things I like to chalk up as "above my pay grade." How restaurant owners run their business is no concern of mine, but, not suggesting anyone else should do this, with those servers with whom I have a rapport and history, I'll often tip a token $5 on the CC and the rest in cash. What they opt to do with it afterwards is no concern of mine, especially the other servers who have absolutely nothing to do with me.

I'm not suggesting what I do is right or wrong, ethical or unethical, but it's just the way I've always approached it.

Blumie

I was in a restaurant in New Orleans recently where I knew my server well. (When I made my reservation I put in a specific request to sit in her section.) When she brought the check, she confirmed that tips are shared with the entire staff. So I left a normal 20% tip on my credit card, but then slipped her $20 in cash on the side.

Jaimito Cartero

So, you want her to cheat her fellow workers on the $20?

Blumie

Yes, that’s exactly what I wanted to do. Shoot, I guess I should have left a zero tip, rather than a 20% tip, on my card. D’oh.

Visconti

Sure, that's fine.

Tips, even in America, are still completely at the discretion of the patron and, of course, it's fine however one goes about it. I'm just indifferent to anyone who isn't directly involved with servicing me and prefer to leave the details entirely to my particular waiter/waitress, but, I do appreciate others may differ in their approach. Generally, I'm more focused on the individual with whom I'm dealing with, rather than his/her restaurant, organization or colleagues/team-members.

Blumie

Well, apparently one of our FT colleagues — whom I won’t name — thinks it inappropriate for me to give a full tip in the staff tip pool, but then slip something extra to the individual serving me. Apparently shelling out an extra $20 of my own money, after fully and reasonably generously compensating the full staff, to give an individual something extra is offensive to his (albeit questionable, IMHO of course) logic. So maybe I need to rethink being generous in order to avoid offending this (albeit absurd, IMHO of course) reasoning.

Jaimito Cartero

Passive aggressive much?

There’s a reason why the restaurant has a shared tip policy. Obviously the server knew that when they started working. It also would help them avoid paying taxes on the income. I salute you for the generous tipping, but it does shortchange others in the tipping pool. Hopefully the server went ahead and threw it in the tip pool. It’s often a fireable offense to not report tips.

Blumie

I shortchanged no one. Your logic would have shortchanged my server by $20. I had fully tipped the tip pool the 20% I normally tip. I was not going to put another $20 into the tip pool just so my server could walk away with an extra $2. Would you feel better if I waited until she got off work and the gifted her $20 off premises?

I do understand what you’re saying. It’s just that your logic leads to an absurd result.

And by the way, I didn’t tell the server what to do with the $20 I gave her. If by her reasoning (hers, not yours) it was appropriate to add that to the tip pool, I’d be completely fine with that. But if she felt that my gift was a gratuity above and beyond, and separate from, my 20% tip, I’m ok with that decision too. Sounds like you’d fire her. Good job.

Visconti

Ah, I just took it as Jaimito's response to a scenario where a server pockets the tip after agreeing to pool them would appear, at least on the surface, dishonorable. For me, I don't know how the restaurant handles it, nor is it any of my business; maybe, the server had been stiffed before or feels aggrieved? Again, not suggesting what others should or shouldn't do, but, for me, I just find it most efficient to leave such matters to my server. What happens after I've gone is entirely an internal matter, as it should be, for him/her, his/her colleagues and the restaurant owner.