The OP may not have articulated the issues properly and yes it is a first world problem but then again so is most of the posts of FT. It doesn't mean Emirates did not offer a substandard F product. Waiting for 20 mins without an update, waiting for however long to get sugar, etc are definitely issues that Emirates crew should have kept the OP updated with, rather than sitting in the galley waiting for the food to heat up. While the food is heating up, they could have walked over to the OP and updated him. These are things definitely to be expected as part of F product. The same with water, the cabin crew should offer options, it shouldn't be left for OP to walk over to the galley and get it.

Straight up fake you say? They may have grounds after all.

Does any one know the name of the song at 7:10?

The great thing about the internet is that anyone can post when they wish and what they wish.
The bad thing is that there can be consequences for what one chooses to write.
Free speech,perhaps.
But no accountability, not exactly.
Choose wisely and carefully, OP.

Second to None
Boozoo Bajou Feat. Willie Hutch

I'm pleased it's not just me disappointed by the oft lauded EK first.

The worst food I've ever had in the air, and that's including Ryanair BOB. Almost inedible.

The airport staff in DXB literally begged my mum for tips during her wheelchair transfer. Then lost her walking stick.

Chauffeur at Sydney asked me to share with two other pax, then got to the car and realised there wasn't enough room for our luggage, despite seeing our cases. And just told me to walk back to the terminal to 'see if I can get another car' then promptly drove off.

Mums GLA DXB flight downgraded to J with a refund far below the far difference, due to EKs Rouse of using full J fares vs Round Trip F ones to calculate a refund.

Never again will I give that airline money.

On a side note, didn't really appreciate the obvious censorship in shows like Modern Family and Arrested Development.

Seeing your responses to anybody who posts anything critical about BA on the BA forum, forgive me for being a bit sceptical Mr Cruz :)

DL, UA accept your challenge.

There are a few things that I don't understand here.
1/ OP is ready to put CC details on internet (tickets bought online, right ?), but is afraid to give them by telephone ?!? Is he aware of all those CC databases hacked around the world ?
2/ As OP seems to be a regular on FCL, why didn't he set a time for "dine on demand" ? He wouldn't have waited.
3/ "Non touch screen" ? Is OP sure it was not simply malfunctioning ? It happened to me once, and, several times I suffered from a shifted pointer (the pointer doesn't appear where I touch).
4/ As for Evian, I fully understand OP's stance. Myself only drink sparkling Voss at the First Class lounge, and Perrier all other times. But, again, he could have informed FAs that he only drinks Evian, and not the lowery filtered drinkable water such as Mai Dubai.
5/ As for sugar, OP is totally free to add sugar to hot chocolate, as well as I have a good friend that drinks lots of sugar with a small hint of coffee. It's OP's right to have a heart attack, as long as it is not on one of my flights.

And, finally, I'm amazed how many posts this guy triggers in few days. Just amazing.

What about the sugar in the metal holder with the toothpick that FAs bring with hot drinks?

Its in little tubes next to the sink with the toothbrushes and razors. You can take it with you back to your seat and lather up. I've never NOT seen it on the 777.