You are right and your friends were wrong. To your friends: Guess what. Being nice is not a substitute for paying someone fairly. You are required to tip properly AND be nice.

Considering the unusual circumstances -- taking a lunch spot at a prime time for the server to earn -- you did the right thing to bump up the tip over the suggested 15 or 20 % standard amount. I do the same thing. With drinks, I may even pay as each round comes out, making sure to include a healthy tip right away, so the server will know that they're taken care of. But the way you did it is fine.

Did the "people waiting on the tables" know this when they started waiting on the tables or was this a total surprise to them.Also I heard people waiting on the tables" can learn 90% of their job function in 8 hours or less. Is this true? FWIW I am always nice to people waiting on the tables", but unfortunately the people waiting on the tables" are not always nice to the customers. BTW are you one of the people waiting on the tables"?

MisterNice

Don't go to the Bahamas MisterNice ~ 15% is automatically added to everything in restos & bars, often resulting in no service.......

And I don't know if you'd rather avoid the restaurants in France with service compris (mandatory tip included) or those where it's non compris.

Speaking of tipping, and how the U.S. is supposedly out of step with most of the rest of the world because the servers rely on tips, is this information incorrect or is it fact that the main difference between the U.S. (along with Canada) and all of these other countries is that the tip is mandatory and included in the bill in the latter?

In the same vein, Holland America Cruise Lines used to advertise that tipping was "not mandatory." After Carnival bought them, tipping is included automatically. That's not to say that there's no tipping - it's compris. @:-)

Urr....your value judgements aside, Americans have to pay non-refundable VAT on resto bills in Europe as well as "service fees", which is essentially the same as tips. At least a tip is discretionary in the U.S. and not a compulsory fee imposed to support the European social system that provides the American zero benefit. And IME, you still customarily have to leave a 5-10% tip on top of that in Europe anyway.

I would also point out that tipping was a custom exported from Europe to America.

Glass houses....

Maybe we Americans should demand that the service charge be removed from European restaurant bills so that we can apply our own norms. After all, do we always have to agree with the norm?

A Swede pays VAT in England and vice versa ~ they both have social systems to protect & enhance the quality of life of their citizens ~ it doesn't really matter where you come from. The American benefits by being able to visit

And no ~ you do not have to leave additional money for a tip in Sweden, or for that matter in France say, but most do (if only by 10-20 kronor or a few Euros), if the service has been good. Americans often take that a step further by leaving a lot more. That's their choice, so no whinging allowed

It's not the Americans whinging, unless you want to count a little gentle sarcasm to make the point.

I agree with the fact that waitstaff knows the lousy pay when they take the job. And I also agree with the premise that the job may not require an advanced education or much technical training.

Having said that, aren't you the least bit empathetic towards someone who is working a low paying job, waiting on strangers no less...doing a job that is absolutely vital to society? I gotta feel for the person who is doing the best they can do by waiting tables. The job isn't easy. But they are working, and maybe this is the most skilled labor they qualify for.

Guess what??? If you want a waitstaff made of folks with advanced college degrees, you are going to pay for it in inflated food prices.

As long as the concept of 'being waited on' exists, you will always have a need for waiters. For any of us who feel grateful to NOT have to wait tables for a living, or grateful to not have any other crappy job, the idea of throwing a few extra bucks on the table for a job well done (that is, if the job was done well) for someone who would be very grateful to receive such money, seems like a very simple way to 'pay it forward'.

And no, I've never been a waitress. But I am a good tipper.

Yawning after two months on FT? You bore easily.

LOL flyerwife! Two months is a bit short unless you're a cat.

Fredd ~ I gotcha (did getcha

A 16% tip sounds generous to me. And I've lived in Chicago for the last two years, which is apparently where the restaurant/bar was located.

Having put myself through school in waiter/bartender occupations (for too may years), I have seen a myriad of tipping situations...from ZERO where I got "slammed" and was "in the weeds" and therefore did not give good service. These situations happen and it is just part of the job. To others, where I received 200% of the total tab (not usual I admit).

In the OP's situation, I don't think the waitress would have given a second though to whether she received $4, $10, or a $14 tip. She would have thrown it in her pocket (or tip jar) and went on with serving her other tables. As a waiter I did not sit and think about every tip I got and calculated the percentages. I knew if it was around 15% that was fine by me and I went on w/ my shift.

I also don't think that you "occupying" a 4-top in the restaurant/lounge when there was no other choice justifies adding another $10 to the tip as a gesture of saying "sorry" for occupying the table during lunch. Doesn't make sense....

What if I have a 4-top for lunch and they all order the soup of the day and that's all! Bill is low, so what? Do they add something more on (other than the usual 15%) because they feel bad for the waiter/waitress that they didnt order the steak sandwiches at a higher price?

just my 2 pennies.