Some of my friends know that I love to eat and everytime I visit them, they want to take me out to the best restaurants. Some of these are sometimes very trendy places and therefore very busy.
Most of the time the experience is spoiled because the waiters rush us. They want to get the table as soon as possible for other patrons.
I clearly hate that, especially if it is a four course dinner, I like to take my time and order each of my courses after I have finished the previous one. Waiters do not like that at all. Am I the one in the wrong or should I stick to my habit and enjoy my dinner the way I want?

You should, indeed, order and enjoy your dinner in the way you want.

Ironically, my pet peeve works in the opposite direction: When I finish eating, I want to get out of the restaurant -- and I hate it when I am unable to catch the waiter's eye to get the check.

Book Antiqua2Black

Stick to your guns! Remember, you are the customer!

A few years ago, after a particularly bad experience at a restaurant in London, including being rushed (and generally, I am a generous tipper), I actually minused an amount from the bill for poor service!

I think your idea of a best restaurant and mine are radically different. I do not recall being rushed in even a "better" restaurant, let alone a "Best" restaurant.

As a rule I like prompt service. However, if I am going out to dinner and know I want time to visit and chat with my company, I politely tell the waiter or waitress that I would like a slow, leisurely service. I am careful to double the tip so I don't allow the wait staff to lose out. I have done this on numerous occasions and never had a problem.

Remember that speed of service at restaurants are very different between the US and Europe. In the US the service is generally very speedy for two reasons. One is that Americans demand it. The other is that waiters make a lot of money on tips and they want you to finish your meal and clear the table for the next party.

In Europe, especially southern Europe, the culture of eating is enjoyable and you want to take your time. Americans visiting Europe often complain about the slow service, but many of us like it that way. Plus the waiters don't make a lot of money on tips and are in no personal rush. The managers may want the table cleared quickly on busy nights, but they wouldn't rush a person who didn't want to be rushed.

I was talking about these three: Nava, Bone's and Seeger's in ATL a few days ago.
I have never been rushed in Europe, especially not in the evening...

If I feel rushed, I have no qalms about asking the server or the manager "are you in a hurry to have this table?" If I'm loitering after the meal and it's clear that the establishment stands a chance to "turn the table", then I understand if they ask me to retire to the bar or something of that ilk. But don't rush four courses of a meal just to give yourself the chance to turn the table. I'm a paying guest and I deserve to eat at a reasonable pace. Rush me and only bad things can happen. I will likely start by complaining, then I may reduce the tip if I feel the waitperson's doing the rushing, and finally, I may never return and I am likely to bad mouth the place to every person I encounter afterwards.

That's one plus for Mexico. I never feel rushed when dining out. As a matter of fact they will never give you your check unless you ask for it. They feel it is an insult to the customer. Not like some restaurants in my area where they slap down the check two minutes after you receive your meal.

Exactly what happened at Nava, only they did not know that I drink up to four espressi's after my meal...

now I agree you shouldn't feel rushed...but on the the other hand it's completely unfair to the waiter if you and your guests hog up a prime table for the night. usually they are onyl given 3 table stations, and if you hog one, you're cutting their tip by at least a third...have a heart, go back to your friend's house for conversation

I agree, I've seen people sit for three hours talking after ordering just appetizers. It is a business and they need to turn the tables over to make a profit. In an empty restaurant, sit for as long as you wish; otherwise eat at a comfortable pace and leave when you're finished. There's never an excuse to be rushed, likewise there's never an excuse to bogart a table and deprive the restaurant and waitstaff of their income.

After reading the Zagat reviews of those 3 restaurants, I am very surprised that they would be pushy.

I now live in Paris and have come to enjoy (and expect) not being rushed.

One of the worst experiences I've had was at SPOON by Alain Ducasse at the Intercontinental in Hongkong. Increadibly rushed; we had to ask the waiter to slow down (to no avail).

Not surprised that his "stars" are fading...

If it's a busy night and you've completed your meal, they should offer to buy you a drink at the bar if they really want the table. They shouldn't rush you during or after the meal, however.

I also don't like it when they start picking up people's plates before everyone is finished with the course. That's a big no-no. It makes those who are still eating feel uncomfortable and rushed.

Sometimes when they try to do it, I'll tell them I'm not done yet and they shouldn't pick up my plate - even when it's completely empty. I shouldn't have to do that, but it's an effort to make my companions more comfortable.


I agree.