You're the one who suggested those of us who do ask for waitstaff opinions are "children," so yeah, I think ego might be entering into it.

If I may say so I think you're misjudging someone else's opinion as a personal attack on the way you conduct yourself in a restaurant.
It wasn't and it isn't.
You're perfectly entitled to seek whatever opinion you wish from a server but I presume you respect someone else's personal preference not to.
Hey,in the scheme of things it ain't that important.
Why,even tonight,I asked a waitress trying to push me some " line-caught " cod exactly when the cod took the bait.
She didn't know and I suspect she didn't even know how to determine whether the fish was swimming in water within the last few days or caught and frozen in a net by a giant Spanish trawler off the coast of Iceland six months ago.
It's why I have no interest in their opinions.

Fair enough; truce! Let me suggest, though, that the way you've expressed yourself on this thread makes that misinterpretation an easy one to make.

I'm retired but drive a car rental shuttle 2 days a week. The most dreaded question I get is " where is there a good place to eat". Because my 02 may be far different from theirs.

One final observation - compare the number of views of this thread to the number of posters who've considered someone's opinions a personal attack on them.
I'm not sure a truce is really necessary because my views were never intended to be offensive in the first place but let's draw a line and move on.

Now,waiters filling up my wine glass when I haven't asked them to REALLY gets my goat !!!

I hosted a small audit team this week. One asked me for a recommendation. Before I made one, I asked a lot of questions. Turns out she was looking to avoid traffic and was fine with fast casual chain dining. So instead of a recommendation, she got directions to Outback and Olive Garden.

I hope you got a good tip.

I've always found the simple line, "I'll take care of the wine service from here, thanks" to work perfectly in avoiding this problem, voiced right after the bottle is uncorked. A single repetition may be necessary if the wine is opened by a sommelier rather than the waiter, though in my experience the word is usually passed along.

I think I'm seeing a pattern here - clearly I'm much luckier than you in finding competent waitstaff!

Most waitstaff I deal with are perfectly fine although I find French servers can be a little up themselves.
I like US waiters quite a lot - all brisk efficiency and Hi what can I get you to drink.
Regarding the wine I've had waiters who've taken the suggestion that I handle it myself as a personal affront and one,memorably,who insisted loudly that it was HIS job.I disabused him of that notion even louder.

My response in a situation like yours would be "Well, I'm a big fan of <food type> and for that I really enjoy <local restaurant>." That way you offer a concrete, helpful suggestion without committing yourself to a lengthy conversation starting with, "Well, what do you like?"

^^ I like this. Thanks.

Except sometimes.

I used to shop at a wholesale (but open to the public) place in the meat district. Their prices could vary a lot; e.g. brie was usually around $2.50/lb. One day I came in and saw a pile of it with a sign "Brie: $1/lb". So I asked the owner what was wrong with it, and he replied "it's ripe."

I wouldn't be surprised if a number of restaurants had specials involving brie that day.

I kind of agree. But it depends on the server's delivery of that line. Too little enthusiasm or too much enthusiasm and it comes off badly. Otherwise, I like the validation. Sometimes I'll say "Really?" and ask for a little more info about "why".

Waiters are essentially sales people who work on commission. So when you ask "what do you recommend" it's like asking a car salesman what do you recommend. The answer will always be something expensive and with a high markup.

Except when it isn't.