Well, that was my initial reaction when first I got to America and people started telling me I need to tip for this and that and whatever else. I thought they were trying to con me, which probably led to bad feelings on both sides. I thought they were being dishonest and they thought (and often said) I was a "cheap @$$hole"

I have a better idea of how it works now but you do have to wonder about how impartial some of the tipping advice is.

I think so, sometimes. However in my experience it's been a small fixed price on the coperta and maybe 10% max on the service charge.

I had a similar experience in a German town with a big international summer music festival. A colleague vigorously insisted that tips were not included, and the waitress agreed. I was skeptical, since I spend a fair amount of time in the EU and had never heard of this, other than the small-change rounding up that is customary. I later concluded we had gotten the milk-the-guilt-stricken-American-tourist line (and my friend was misinformed).

It's amazing also how many restaurants you go into where the words " a XX% service charge is automatically added to your bill " are always the smallest printed on the menu and in the place you're least likely to read.

Particularly in restaurants where the tip line is left vacant on the check that already includes a service charge.

I work on the principle that restaurants, especially the swankiest, are there to try to rip you off and it's best to get your retaliation in first - which is why I always ask at the outset if service charge is included.

My other bugbear is having my wine glass filled by a waiter. The first time they do it I always tell them politely that I'll be working the wine bottle.If they do it again I call the manager over. If it happens again I cause a scene.

Eating out is on my terms not theirs.

Dined in a West London Middle Eastern restaurant tonight. They weren't kidding when they said Service wasn't included on the menu. Perhaps I had to order it with the food - without doubt the 5hitiest surliest service I've had in years. Just glad there was no service charge included because it allowed me to adjust the tip to a sum the service and food deserved - nil! If I could have given less i would have.

all three things you described were, and are, very illegal: (1) dining and dashing, (2) docking an employee's pay when someone dines and dashes, and (3) failing to pay wages but forcing the server to live on tips only.

while the "hippy types" are petty thiefs, that woman's employer was the real criminal.

Well that's what I thought too, but I was told I was mistaken.

I'm also told by a colleague in Florida whose wife is a wine supplier that at least one national chain is doing it now. I mentioned it online, and was told it could not be so, so I asked him again, and her insisted it was. I decided to drop the subject.

Isn't promoting tax evasion EXACTLY what tipping does?

As I understand it, in the US, they take a percentage of servers' sale to estimate tips. What other profession are they estimating revenue. Other jobs pay tax on all their earnings, not just a guess based on an inaccurate calculation.

In many parts of Canada, the waiter claims how much tips they made per years. A friend of mine just claims that he was a bad waiter and didn't make any.

In a sense it's tipping itself that promotes tax evasion.

I read a facebook discussion from one of my friends a few months back where she went out on a date with a guy and he only tipped 20% and was ranting about how cheap he was. Several people chimed in saying 15-20% is standard and she was having none of it. Said 25% is the bare minimum and was quite adamant about it.

Her reason for tipping in the 25-30%, even above range? None other than giving out that much will make the server's day. Was saying that it was only a little bit more to you but will mean a lot to the server.

So that is why we have tip creep. There are always people who tip above just because they feel it is the right thing to do, the majority just go along with what is standard, and a few always tip below. Eventually the people who overtip do it often enough that servers come to expect it and suddenly what was overtipping a decade ago is suddenly standard.

Let's follow this thought...

While people will attack your numbers, they are not that far fetched.

Here's a story of "a friend of mine"

"She" would have 4 seatings, 6 tables each. The goal was $20 per table.
Some small tables gave $5. while other larger ones gave $80+. There were 6 servers in the restaurant will equal sized sections. They were full 150 days per year (or more).

The goal would have her easily at $480 (to 600+) per day in tips. Mostly, she would make more. Some days less. She would also tip those who supported her, leaving usually with about 350 (to 550) cash. The employer also paid a decent wage (appx $60 after tax), medical, dental, pension, etc.

So for the 150 days work, this person would make appx $61,000 (or more) after tax dollars... and take the other 22 weeks of the year off without pay.

Many servers make more. Many less. It's based on volume and meal price. And it adds up to a lot.

Indeed. I don't pull over on the highway on a sweltering hot day and give the road construction crew a $20 bill because I empathize that their work is difficult on a hot day. I don't pay the doctor extra because his surgery solved a chronic issue. And I certainly don't pay the janitors money for keeping a building clean even though I know their employers pay them too low a wage to survive.

CLASSIC! :D This shows how ridiculous tipping is.^ ^ ^

Another great point.

What comes around, goes around.
It's natural. In good times, people on the way up are going to spread it around.

Just as relevant, those who are having bad times, NEED to tip less.

The 10% - 20% Rule is as much for the ability of the tipper as the rating of service. ^

Sean, that's being back to the way tipping, where it exists, is in most countries. Or has been up till now.

You tip if and what you feel like, there is no formula. That's why I find these lists of what to tip in X country a major fail. It's projecting North America.

Sales, or salary? It would be interesting to see how much the revenue assumes.

No, if the tip is given by credit card, then there is a record of it and the server is forced to share it with the other employees who are entitled to a cut (cooks, dishwashers, etc.) and pay taxes on it.

BINGO! You hit the nail right on the head. It's like an auction, where you are bidding for the server's affection. In order to get the server to like you and treat you well the next time you come to that restaurant, you have to tip more than everyone else. Everyone else has the same idea, so the amount keeps increasing.

I see it all the time on the Disney world message boards. It's insane to me to suggest a 25% tip for meals in the $40-$60 per person range, especially for families of 4 or more.