paul4040

Tipping is always a difficult ethical dilemma for me. On the one hand, I'm a strong believer that "when in Rome" is a good motto to have wherever you travel (how many of us get flustered at tourists not following Tube etiquette??!).

On the other hand, I believe firmly that employees should be paid a proper minimum wage, and that they shouldn't have to rely on tips to make a living.

I almost always tip however, where the local culture seems it appropriate by their own values and standards.

golfmad

Reminds me of a great 'Larry David' episode from his own series (creator of Seinfeld) where he adds an extra tip to the waiter to take care of the maître d'. It all goes horribly wrong.

Having lived here for a few years I've got used to the whole tipping thing. I used to find it really odd but am used to it now. It would be rude not to leave a tip for a free breakfast. When in the US I usually leave a $2 tip for my free Hilton Diamond breakfasts. I would always leave a tip at a bar including Admiral's clubs.

pianotraveller

I do this too when I'm using cash, in cabs or in any situation where I'm tipping on top of an amount I'm already paying for a service. The difficulty is where there's no 'fee' involved, but just a tip as in the case of a hotel porter carrying your bags to the room. Is it ok to ask for change from a $20 bill in that scenario? I think I'd feel a bit self conscious...

wemorwell

Just back from Toronto.
Tipping felt really weird when using the 1 and 2 Dollar coins.
Money is money I know but coins feel cheap.

Schultzois

When in a situation like that (whether in US or not), I usually take care at the reception desk of the hotel whilst checking in to ask for change for whatever bill I happen to have. They are almost always prepared, and whether they know (I think they usually do) that it's to tip their staff or to be prepared for a taxi later on, it's part of their job to do it.

robbo17

We had a few hours in the lounge sitting at the bar ....we didn't tip to begin with but after very quick efficient service we tried to give said server ten bucks she insisted it went in the pot fair play other staff were busy watching basketball.

Polomarc

^
Had one incident at an all inclusive in Cuba and due to a large amount of Canadian tourists they were used to tip, for the first days we couldn't figure out why we got the evil eye at the buffet breakfast Learned later why but still felt strange

aceman

Yes it's funny how North Americans create this bubble of expectation around them. I was followed out of a bar in cancun by the barman once asking where his tip was. I walked back in to show him where I'd left it, picked it up and left...

stevieed

Last time I was in an AA J lounge I got told off by an American for not tipping for a drink. I ended up giving a dollar for a thimble of coke which was mostly ice anyway. May as well gone into the terminal and bought a can of coke...

As much as I love the US (I'm dating an American, own a house there, and will be there 3 times this year) I can never get used to their tipping culture, although I do partake as when in Rome...

windowontheAside

I'm with you stevieed. I've got(ten!) used to the US tipping culture, but the one place it bugs me is lounges. In the UK, I can help myself to as much Coke as I want, and dilute to taste with ice. Sometimes I drink it UK style with one/two cubes, sometimes US style with a glassful.

In the US, I get no choice. I get mixer coke (rarely the same quality as in cans) and always over a lot of ice. And I have to wait to be served for refills. And I'm expected to tip for what is all round an inferior experience. So mostly I don't bother any more. Just buy a Coke out in the airport and take it in with me. Easier for me, easier for them.

Seems a bit wrong somehow, but there y'go.

Hannibal Lecter

On a different note...
I've never seen anyone tipping those who clean the toilets
in the Casinos in Vegas, they are the people who deserve tip not those
who snatch the bag out your hand to put in a taxi standing
just in front of you.

flibbly

Ha. Speaking of Cancun, I was in a bar there a few years ago when drinking Corona/Sol with lime in the top was the fashionable thing. On my first couple of visits to the bar I duly left a tip, but the third time there was no lime given. I asked for a piece to be told it was too much trouble to cut up another one. I paid the exact amount for the beer and when asked where the tip was said it was too much trouble to break into a larger bill. I've never got such a look of complete hatred from a barmaid.

fripperies

I do the same. Of course they know why you want to change your million pfstycz note into ten 1000,000 pfstycz notes. BTW do you tip the cashier for giving you the small change to tip the doorman? I don't myself but it's another of these inconsistencies that highlight the unfairness of tipping.

Tipping is a paternalistic practice from an earlier age of gross inequality that has been handily co-opted by employers in a new age of inequality. Let's face it, how often do we tip to show gratitude? If you want to show gratitude, smiling and saying thank you does it. We tip because we know the staff aren't paid enough to survive without tips (i.e to subside their Scrooge of an employer) and to avoid feeling like a cheapskate.

re NY CCR staff: discouraging staff from accepting tips is admirable. Provided they are paid a living wage. But are they ? How is one to know? In the absence of paying their staff a living wage, what I'd like from service industries is a clear statement of policy - on their website, the booking form, the menu, whatever - e.g. whether tipping is encouraged or discouraged, whether tips are kept by the individual, pooled and shared out between front- and back-scene staff, or just kept by the company as general revenue (sadly not uncommon).

IAN-UK

Isn't there a measure of over-thinking and rationalising going on here?

It's your money and your moral/social framework. If that allows you to adapt to the local tipping paradigm, that's great; but no big sweat if you don't. Do whatever makes you most comfortable.

And note that it's not really fair to try imposing your tipping strategy on others.

Me? I'm massively uncomfortable at giving money away beyond paying the cost of a service. So in general I don't, unless extreme social pressure forces me into it.

I can easily rationalise the reluctance to tip as unwillingness to support corporate hospitality industry with a cash donation. That unwillingness certainly exists; but, truth be told, a genetic imperative to be careful with my money is the driver.



Sheer gratitude saw me giving a fiver to the RAC man who fixed my tyre last week. I'll have to watch that wayward emotion

Geordie405

I usually tip 15 - 20 % of the value of the check / bill when in a restaurant or a bar with table service. At the bar, it would be a dollar or a couple of dollars per drink - even in the AA lounges where it's free. If you want to signify really poor service then the deal is that you'd leave a quarter (or other small change) on the table to show that you didn't forget the tip, but rather you're deliberately leaving a poor tip!

I have generally found that - particularly when at the bar - a good tip on the first drink will get you preferential service going forward from that point.

In the case of a free drink (for example in a restaurant where the server is giving you a drink on the house) the custom is usually to tip the value of the drink.