Hollywood to Bollywood, the long way: UA/Swiss/Thai 77W/Emirates A380 F + Singapore J
Jun 2, 2012, 12:19 am
#106
Original Poster
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: LAS
Programs: DL PM, UA PS, Hyatt Globalist, Marriott Titanium
Posts: 4,904
LHR Star Alliance Lounge, BMI Great British Lounge
Over the course of a month, I had eaten waaaay too much. I needed to go on a diet. Good thing I was about to fly United.
I made it off the Heathrow Express and took some kind of service elevator to get to the departures level. Except the door close button wouldn’t work. And every 15 seconds, a new passenger would come running toward the elevator to catch it, stopping the closing doors. That scenario repeated about 4 times. Door close buttons on elevators are just about as useful as the “Search” button on the Delta award engine.
Once I made it to the departures level, I wandered around like a chicken with its head cut off before finding the United desks. What’s this? A separate check-in area for Global Services and First passengers then? Not too shabby! I entered the area to have an airport employee ask me a bunch of nonsensical security questions before a quick check-in (due to no lines). I had actually checked in on the mobile app and changed my seat to 2A from 1A, which the agent confirmed. A check for an empty 1K or 2K yielded a negative response … I love sitting on the starboard side on approach to Los Angeles, especially on a clear day (which, I’ll admit, is rare especially in the middle months of the year). I was given a pretty vanilla boarding pass that’s quite possibly the anti-Thai Airways BP, with a tiny “F” denoted after the flight number.
LHR GS/Global First check-in
I was also given directions to the Star Alliance lounge, which the check-in agent ensured “has a great breakfast.”
Security went by quickly, with the use of the fast-track lane. While putting my belt back on, a government official approached me, and this actual conversation ensued:
G.O.: “Good morning, sir, I’m from the government.” (if I were Ronald Reagan, I’d be terrified about now).
Me: “Uh, hi.”
G.O.: “You’re traveling to Los Angeles?” (after a peek at my boarding pass)
Me: “Yes.”
G.O. “How long were you in the UK?”
Me: “Less than a day.”
G.O.: “Why so short?”
Me: “Because then I don't have to pay you £130 for the APD” (actual answer and reasoning).
G.O.: “I see. May I ask how much you spent in the past day, especially your lodging?”
Me: “My hotel was on points, so £0. Kill the APD, I’ll stay longer next time.”
Seriously though, what a stupid levy.
I headed off to the *A lounge and was told to turn right toward the F side. While I’ve now been spoiled by the likes of the LH FCT and the TG FCL, this was still a pretty sorry excuse for an F lounge. Sure, it’s quieter than the J side, but it’s not much nicer in any other way. The food options were pathetic. I stayed for about 10 minutes to take some pictures, then left.
Entrance
F side
F side
Where is this "great breakfast?"
No type of lighting could make this look good
J side. Same food though ...
I was about to roam the halls of T1 until it hit me: BMI! They’re still part of *A, right? They’ve got to have a lounge somewhere here … a few looks around and I found signs to their international lounge, quite a walk away at about 15-20 minutes, but I was determined to check it out.
Indeed, it is quite a walk, through some hallways and areas of Heathrow I’d think were off-limits to passengers if I wasn’t blinded by going to what must be a carrier’s flagship lounge. I made it and presented my boarding pass, which the lounge dragon took a while to peruse.
“What class are you flying?”
“First.”
“Where does it say that?”
“It’s that tiny ‘F’ after the flight number.”
“Now why would they put it there? That doesn’t make any sense. But seat 2A to Los Angeles, so I believe you.”
The only indication of cabin on the new UA boarding passes ...
The BMI lounge is nicely appointed and has character that was missing in the large *A lounge. It's what I imagine a British home to be like, if designed by an airline and placed near a runway. Best yet, it has great views of the tarmac.
Seating area near entrance (The Lobby)
Bar area (The Local)
Better than the *A Lounge selection
Yes, still better.
Daybeds with tarmac views (The Slumber)
Tarmac views. I'm going to say that this pic has symbolism (BMI caught between OneWorld and Star) but that's just lucky timing.
The only problem with the lounge is that it would take a long time to reach my flight, so I had to leave with about 20 minutes left before boarding.
Farewell, BMI.
I made it off the Heathrow Express and took some kind of service elevator to get to the departures level. Except the door close button wouldn’t work. And every 15 seconds, a new passenger would come running toward the elevator to catch it, stopping the closing doors. That scenario repeated about 4 times. Door close buttons on elevators are just about as useful as the “Search” button on the Delta award engine.
Once I made it to the departures level, I wandered around like a chicken with its head cut off before finding the United desks. What’s this? A separate check-in area for Global Services and First passengers then? Not too shabby! I entered the area to have an airport employee ask me a bunch of nonsensical security questions before a quick check-in (due to no lines). I had actually checked in on the mobile app and changed my seat to 2A from 1A, which the agent confirmed. A check for an empty 1K or 2K yielded a negative response … I love sitting on the starboard side on approach to Los Angeles, especially on a clear day (which, I’ll admit, is rare especially in the middle months of the year). I was given a pretty vanilla boarding pass that’s quite possibly the anti-Thai Airways BP, with a tiny “F” denoted after the flight number.
LHR GS/Global First check-in
I was also given directions to the Star Alliance lounge, which the check-in agent ensured “has a great breakfast.”
Security went by quickly, with the use of the fast-track lane. While putting my belt back on, a government official approached me, and this actual conversation ensued:
G.O.: “Good morning, sir, I’m from the government.” (if I were Ronald Reagan, I’d be terrified about now).
Me: “Uh, hi.”
G.O.: “You’re traveling to Los Angeles?” (after a peek at my boarding pass)
Me: “Yes.”
G.O. “How long were you in the UK?”
Me: “Less than a day.”
G.O.: “Why so short?”
Me: “Because then I don't have to pay you £130 for the APD” (actual answer and reasoning).
G.O.: “I see. May I ask how much you spent in the past day, especially your lodging?”
Me: “My hotel was on points, so £0. Kill the APD, I’ll stay longer next time.”
Seriously though, what a stupid levy.
I headed off to the *A lounge and was told to turn right toward the F side. While I’ve now been spoiled by the likes of the LH FCT and the TG FCL, this was still a pretty sorry excuse for an F lounge. Sure, it’s quieter than the J side, but it’s not much nicer in any other way. The food options were pathetic. I stayed for about 10 minutes to take some pictures, then left.
Entrance
F side
F side
Where is this "great breakfast?"
No type of lighting could make this look good
J side. Same food though ...
I was about to roam the halls of T1 until it hit me: BMI! They’re still part of *A, right? They’ve got to have a lounge somewhere here … a few looks around and I found signs to their international lounge, quite a walk away at about 15-20 minutes, but I was determined to check it out.
Indeed, it is quite a walk, through some hallways and areas of Heathrow I’d think were off-limits to passengers if I wasn’t blinded by going to what must be a carrier’s flagship lounge. I made it and presented my boarding pass, which the lounge dragon took a while to peruse.
“What class are you flying?”
“First.”
“Where does it say that?”
“It’s that tiny ‘F’ after the flight number.”
“Now why would they put it there? That doesn’t make any sense. But seat 2A to Los Angeles, so I believe you.”
The only indication of cabin on the new UA boarding passes ...
The BMI lounge is nicely appointed and has character that was missing in the large *A lounge. It's what I imagine a British home to be like, if designed by an airline and placed near a runway. Best yet, it has great views of the tarmac.
Seating area near entrance (The Lobby)
Bar area (The Local)
Better than the *A Lounge selection
Yes, still better.
Daybeds with tarmac views (The Slumber)
Tarmac views. I'm going to say that this pic has symbolism (BMI caught between OneWorld and Star) but that's just lucky timing.
The only problem with the lounge is that it would take a long time to reach my flight, so I had to leave with about 20 minutes left before boarding.
Farewell, BMI.
Last edited by amolkold; Jun 2, 2012 at 2:20 am
Jun 2, 2012, 1:49 am
#107
Original Poster
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: LAS
Programs: DL PM, UA PS, Hyatt Globalist, Marriott Titanium
Posts: 4,904
United 935 LHR-LAX (F ... I think) - 1/2
UA 935
LHR-LAX, 11h05m
Boeing 777-200 (new configuration)
Seat 2A, F
I got to the gate just as the gate agent was describing the United boarding “process.” What was said was that they’d board by zone numbers. As an F passenger, I had Group 1 on my BP, so when the gate agent announced, “we’d like to board the first group, Global Services,” I took the comma in that phrase as an “and.” I was turned away, as 4 eager GS members walked ahead to board first. Two of them were in business. Remind me again what “First” and "One" mean? I know I’m lucky to be flying ahead of the wing due to miles, but already this is an experience I wouldn’t ever put down money for if I needed to buy a ticket and UA was one of several options.
A bit later, I was invited to board as an F pax, and walked through the jetway. Two bridges were attached, one for F/J going to 1L and the other for Y going to 2L. I took my seat at 2A. Despite seeing 2 empty seat assignments at check-in, all 8 seats were eventually taken.
Seat 1A, a bit different from 1A on the 747
F/J Divider behind 2A. Klassy with a K.
I don’t know if this is because this was a U.S.-bound flight, but there was just a lot of hubbub and commotion within the cabin. It seemed like the aisle was a fashion runway and everybody wanted to strut their stuff. Ground staff plus crew members (both service and cockpit) were running throughout the cabin – even though we boarded 50 minutes ahead of schedule. What’s all the hubbub about? It’s another reason why I prefer 747s, either the top deck or the nose section.
I wasn’t really welcomed onboard, just asked if I would like anything to drink. Since it was barely 10am, I stuck with a cold glass of water, delivered in a plastic cup. At least the FA placed the advertisements on the napkin downward. I went to place my carry-on in the bin, but found that the bin directly above my seat was filled with crew baggage. I instead put it one bin over. Not a big deal, but seriously?
After having traveled around the world for the better part of a month, I’d noticed a few things about Americans compared to other citizens of the world. We are a talkative bunch, and our flight pursers are no different. The crew was London-based, but the purser definitely spoke with a U.S. accent. In the time it takes for a TG or SQ or EK purser to read through a script in 2 languages, it takes that much time for a UA purser to formulate a coherent message in 1 language. Add in their some filler phrases like, “we do appreciate your cooperation throughout this flight.” No need to say that … just a simple “thank you.” Want me to fasten my seatbelt? I’ll do it. Want me to put my bag away? Certainly. Why wouldn’t I cooperate? Is it because you have an unwelcoming service environment? Oh right, I forgot about the poor souls down the back. Someone should teach them that foreign carriers like BA, VS, and NZ fly this route as well ….
But back to the commotion … it’s tough to get ready for a flight when there are so many people running up and down the aisles. Sure, I usually fly economy, but it’s only other passengers slowly walking down the aisles, finding their small parcel of space for the next few hours. There’s a lot of camaraderie in the affair. But the F and forward J cabins were like a warzone. I tried to escape to the forward lav, but it seemed like it was the pilots’ second home for the entire flight. Add to the fact that there was only 1 for the F cabin … “there used to be 2” said the purser while I was waiting. But more on that later. I entertained myself by reading the flight plan left out near the galley.
Once the “ground crew, please leave the aircraft” announcement was made, I headed back to my seat. Ahh, now this is more F. Well, except for the plastic cup of ice next to me. Menus were handed out, but not before I saw the FA ask the purser in the galley, “So … when do I pass these out?”
You guys, it's okay! This man says the product is getting better! Then "Rhapsody in Blue" played!
We began taxiing toward the runway, along side the UA departures to IAD and SFO. One thing I really don’t like about the UA F seat is the shoulder strap you have to wear during taxi/takeoff/landing. It’s incredibly uncomfortable.
I LIKE YOUR MILES.
Following a company twin, headed to the other California hub
While takeoff was to the east, we immediately made a left turn to head back toward the west, so no views of London. With the sun shining brightly, I soon closed all 3 of my window shades, something that seat 1A decided not to do. Since there’s no barrier alongside the windows (like with TG/9W 777s and EK’s A380s) the sun shined brightly in my face. Not one to tell another passenger in another row what to do, I made do by placing my menu in between the gap. Again, lucky to be in F, but things like this should have been caught in the cabin design.
Bright in my eyes.
The UA menu is good for something ...
But hey, at least I was in a solo seat next to the windows. Since the seat faces toward the aisle, you get to know whoever sits across the aisle from you. Today, 2C placed his bare feet up on the console, right next to 2H's space. Glad I wasn't over there.
After he put some socks on ...
MacGyver-ing a privacy divider via the seat storage compartment door. Also, the wine glass is empty, not a chance event on this flight.
Having had 12 segments on foreign carriers since my last UA flight, I had forgotten just how long it takes for the captain to turn off the fasten seat-belt sign. The FAs did not follow this sign, and started service soon after takeoff. Meal orders were taken as 1A, 1C, 2C, 2A, then the right-aisle, and so I guess some preference to the GS members around me (which is fine).
Taking orders. I'll let you surmise what I think is wrong with this picture.
I was given a ramekin of hot nuts, which were delicious, but drink orders weren’t taken until after they were delivered, so my glass of wine arrived while I was almost finished #FirstClassProblems.
Wait, then what's that circular part for?
That's better.
Table setting. LX's salt + pepper shakers probably beat up UA's on the Star Alliance playground.
Menu:
Salmon. A bit cold, but still good.
The designers of the UA F seat must have forgotten that tables should be level, since mine (and others) sloped downward. The soup was alright, though not as good as the mushroom brie soup from SFO to FRA.
Salad was decent.
The salmon was good, but where's the egg fried rice??? United's definition of "Asian-style" means "put some soy sauce on the side..."
Cheese plate.
I actually was enjoying the cheese plate but wanted another set of crackers (since they only give 2). Before I could ask, the FA took the plate away. Again, kind of annoying. Every other flight, they’ve asked, “are you finished” or “may I take this?” I feel as if this crew just wanted to get the service done with, since I was the slowest eater in the cabin (others were getting their entreés while I got my soup or salad).
LHR-LAX, 11h05m
Boeing 777-200 (new configuration)
Seat 2A, F
I got to the gate just as the gate agent was describing the United boarding “process.” What was said was that they’d board by zone numbers. As an F passenger, I had Group 1 on my BP, so when the gate agent announced, “we’d like to board the first group, Global Services,” I took the comma in that phrase as an “and.” I was turned away, as 4 eager GS members walked ahead to board first. Two of them were in business. Remind me again what “First” and "One" mean? I know I’m lucky to be flying ahead of the wing due to miles, but already this is an experience I wouldn’t ever put down money for if I needed to buy a ticket and UA was one of several options.
A bit later, I was invited to board as an F pax, and walked through the jetway. Two bridges were attached, one for F/J going to 1L and the other for Y going to 2L. I took my seat at 2A. Despite seeing 2 empty seat assignments at check-in, all 8 seats were eventually taken.
Seat 1A, a bit different from 1A on the 747
F/J Divider behind 2A. Klassy with a K.
I don’t know if this is because this was a U.S.-bound flight, but there was just a lot of hubbub and commotion within the cabin. It seemed like the aisle was a fashion runway and everybody wanted to strut their stuff. Ground staff plus crew members (both service and cockpit) were running throughout the cabin – even though we boarded 50 minutes ahead of schedule. What’s all the hubbub about? It’s another reason why I prefer 747s, either the top deck or the nose section.
I wasn’t really welcomed onboard, just asked if I would like anything to drink. Since it was barely 10am, I stuck with a cold glass of water, delivered in a plastic cup. At least the FA placed the advertisements on the napkin downward. I went to place my carry-on in the bin, but found that the bin directly above my seat was filled with crew baggage. I instead put it one bin over. Not a big deal, but seriously?
After having traveled around the world for the better part of a month, I’d noticed a few things about Americans compared to other citizens of the world. We are a talkative bunch, and our flight pursers are no different. The crew was London-based, but the purser definitely spoke with a U.S. accent. In the time it takes for a TG or SQ or EK purser to read through a script in 2 languages, it takes that much time for a UA purser to formulate a coherent message in 1 language. Add in their some filler phrases like, “we do appreciate your cooperation throughout this flight.” No need to say that … just a simple “thank you.” Want me to fasten my seatbelt? I’ll do it. Want me to put my bag away? Certainly. Why wouldn’t I cooperate? Is it because you have an unwelcoming service environment? Oh right, I forgot about the poor souls down the back. Someone should teach them that foreign carriers like BA, VS, and NZ fly this route as well ….
But back to the commotion … it’s tough to get ready for a flight when there are so many people running up and down the aisles. Sure, I usually fly economy, but it’s only other passengers slowly walking down the aisles, finding their small parcel of space for the next few hours. There’s a lot of camaraderie in the affair. But the F and forward J cabins were like a warzone. I tried to escape to the forward lav, but it seemed like it was the pilots’ second home for the entire flight. Add to the fact that there was only 1 for the F cabin … “there used to be 2” said the purser while I was waiting. But more on that later. I entertained myself by reading the flight plan left out near the galley.
Once the “ground crew, please leave the aircraft” announcement was made, I headed back to my seat. Ahh, now this is more F. Well, except for the plastic cup of ice next to me. Menus were handed out, but not before I saw the FA ask the purser in the galley, “So … when do I pass these out?”
You guys, it's okay! This man says the product is getting better! Then "Rhapsody in Blue" played!
We began taxiing toward the runway, along side the UA departures to IAD and SFO. One thing I really don’t like about the UA F seat is the shoulder strap you have to wear during taxi/takeoff/landing. It’s incredibly uncomfortable.
I LIKE YOUR MILES.
Following a company twin, headed to the other California hub
While takeoff was to the east, we immediately made a left turn to head back toward the west, so no views of London. With the sun shining brightly, I soon closed all 3 of my window shades, something that seat 1A decided not to do. Since there’s no barrier alongside the windows (like with TG/9W 777s and EK’s A380s) the sun shined brightly in my face. Not one to tell another passenger in another row what to do, I made do by placing my menu in between the gap. Again, lucky to be in F, but things like this should have been caught in the cabin design.
Bright in my eyes.
The UA menu is good for something ...
But hey, at least I was in a solo seat next to the windows. Since the seat faces toward the aisle, you get to know whoever sits across the aisle from you. Today, 2C placed his bare feet up on the console, right next to 2H's space. Glad I wasn't over there.
After he put some socks on ...
MacGyver-ing a privacy divider via the seat storage compartment door. Also, the wine glass is empty, not a chance event on this flight.
Having had 12 segments on foreign carriers since my last UA flight, I had forgotten just how long it takes for the captain to turn off the fasten seat-belt sign. The FAs did not follow this sign, and started service soon after takeoff. Meal orders were taken as 1A, 1C, 2C, 2A, then the right-aisle, and so I guess some preference to the GS members around me (which is fine).
Taking orders. I'll let you surmise what I think is wrong with this picture.
I was given a ramekin of hot nuts, which were delicious, but drink orders weren’t taken until after they were delivered, so my glass of wine arrived while I was almost finished #FirstClassProblems.
Wait, then what's that circular part for?
That's better.
Table setting. LX's salt + pepper shakers probably beat up UA's on the Star Alliance playground.
Menu:
TO BEGIN
Chilled Appetizer
Citrus-infused smoked peppered salmon with micro greens
Soup
Wild Mushroom and Asparagus
Fresh Seasonal Greens
Tomatoes, artichokes, black olive and croutons with you choice of classic Caesar dressing or roasted garlic red wine vinaigrette
MAIN COURSE
Grilled Filet Mignon
Herb and Parmesan compound butter, tomato balsamic sauce, pumpkin mash, carrots, and artichoke
Indian-style Mango Chicken Curry
Pea and cumin rice, pumpkin curry, potatoes with spinach, cucumber and mint raita.
Asian-style Fillet of Salmon
Asian-style sauce, egg fried rice, green beans and red bell pepper.
Vegetable and Ricotta Roulade
Roasted tomato sauce, sautéed asparagus and Parmesan cheese
TO FINISH
International Cheese Selection
Roubilliac, Smoked Cheddar and Stilton
Grapes and crackers served with Graham's Late Bottled Vintage Prt
Dessert
Ice cream with your choice of toppings
Chilled Appetizer
Citrus-infused smoked peppered salmon with micro greens
Soup
Wild Mushroom and Asparagus
Fresh Seasonal Greens
Tomatoes, artichokes, black olive and croutons with you choice of classic Caesar dressing or roasted garlic red wine vinaigrette
MAIN COURSE
Grilled Filet Mignon
Herb and Parmesan compound butter, tomato balsamic sauce, pumpkin mash, carrots, and artichoke
Indian-style Mango Chicken Curry
Pea and cumin rice, pumpkin curry, potatoes with spinach, cucumber and mint raita.
Asian-style Fillet of Salmon
Asian-style sauce, egg fried rice, green beans and red bell pepper.
Vegetable and Ricotta Roulade
Roasted tomato sauce, sautéed asparagus and Parmesan cheese
TO FINISH
International Cheese Selection
Roubilliac, Smoked Cheddar and Stilton
Grapes and crackers served with Graham's Late Bottled Vintage Prt
Dessert
Ice cream with your choice of toppings
Salmon. A bit cold, but still good.
The designers of the UA F seat must have forgotten that tables should be level, since mine (and others) sloped downward. The soup was alright, though not as good as the mushroom brie soup from SFO to FRA.
Salad was decent.
The salmon was good, but where's the egg fried rice??? United's definition of "Asian-style" means "put some soy sauce on the side..."
Cheese plate.
I actually was enjoying the cheese plate but wanted another set of crackers (since they only give 2). Before I could ask, the FA took the plate away. Again, kind of annoying. Every other flight, they’ve asked, “are you finished” or “may I take this?” I feel as if this crew just wanted to get the service done with, since I was the slowest eater in the cabin (others were getting their entreés while I got my soup or salad).
Last edited by amolkold; Jun 5, 2012 at 8:23 pm
Jun 2, 2012, 2:06 am
#108
Original Poster
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: LAS
Programs: DL PM, UA PS, Hyatt Globalist, Marriott Titanium
Posts: 4,904
United 935 LHR-LAX (F, I guess) - 2/2
After I finished lunch and a movie, I put the seat into flat bed mode and got some snoozes. Meal service finished about 2 hours in and I woke up with a bit more than 4 hours to go, so I slept for a good 4.5 hours. The UA F seat is alright for sleeping. They may not have a turndown service. Or mattress pad. Or pajamas. Or a decent duvet - I've had better on DL transcon J. But hey, it's better than Economy, right?? In truth, I guess the pillow is big?
I'll say one positive thing about Global First - the new amenity kits are pretty nice. They're practical and full of stuff I'd actually use on a long flight:
Upon awaking from my slumber, I really wanted a Diet Coke … rather than wait for 20 minutes, I prepared to push the call button, right after saying my last rites. Fortunately, the Diet Coke arrived, although the empty can stuck around for a while after I was finished.
Another annoying thing, like I mentioned, is that there’s only 1 lav in the new config, which is right next to the cockpit and the crew rest area. For the better part of the flight, that lavatory was inaccessible since the FAs set up a fence-like barrier whenever the cockpit was open. This meant that F pax had to use one of the two J lavatories … but I thought you can’t leave your ticketed cabin? Or is this one of those times where that’s okay?
NO LAV FOR YOU
To further blur the lines between “Global First” and “BusinessFirst,” there were absolutely no curtains drawn at either the forward or rear part of the F cabin. That means that light from the galley was quite bothersome (and made me glad I switched from 1A to 2A the day before). From my seat, I could see all the way down to the front of Economy. Again, lucky to be here, but I don’t see the price or mileage premium in this seat over Business. Sorry, BusinessFirst.
Taken from next to Door 1L, while waiting for the lav.
But anyway. As we crossed into the western United States, 'twas time for the second meal service. Remember BKK-FRA on TG? This flight was a mere 150 miles shorter, and only 15 minutes shorter time-wise. Compare that to this:
Menu
That's it.
I think I saw this in the Lean Cuisine selection at my local grocer's freezer.
LHR catering knows how to do scones, but the salad was an affront to taste buds everywhere. Blech.
The best part of the meal. I grabbed it in the BMI lounge. The UA FAs didn't bat an eye to it, but I wouldn't dare pull outside food out on a TG/SQ flight.
As the line for the F lav grew, we began our approach into LAX. Smoggy. Hot. Lacking greenery. Good to be headed home!
There's an ocean somewhere there ...
Before landing, the team of FAs came by to thank every passenger for flying Uni ... LOL, JK, NOTHING OF THE SORT. Though there were suddenly a lot of Y and J FAs who marched through the aisles to do whatever it is they needed to do up front. Probably to use the F lav.
Through the parade of FAs, this somehow fell on the ground and remained for the duration of the flight. I would have picked it up, but the seatbelt sign was on ...
We made our way to a gate at T7, and were asked by the purser over the PA to close the window shades to keep the aircraft cool. I made my way to Immigration - I don't have Global Entry but our flight was the first to arrive, so there wasn't any line. I still didn't receive the "back-room treatment" that I sadistically want one day (only to validate the craziness of the trip); instead, I got a polite "welcome home" from the CBP officer.
It took about 20 minutes to get my bags out. I stepped outside to a refreshingly warm and dry 72º day in the Southern California area, with cool ocean breezes waving the palm trees toward the east.
There's no place like home.
I'll say one positive thing about Global First - the new amenity kits are pretty nice. They're practical and full of stuff I'd actually use on a long flight:
Upon awaking from my slumber, I really wanted a Diet Coke … rather than wait for 20 minutes, I prepared to push the call button, right after saying my last rites. Fortunately, the Diet Coke arrived, although the empty can stuck around for a while after I was finished.
Another annoying thing, like I mentioned, is that there’s only 1 lav in the new config, which is right next to the cockpit and the crew rest area. For the better part of the flight, that lavatory was inaccessible since the FAs set up a fence-like barrier whenever the cockpit was open. This meant that F pax had to use one of the two J lavatories … but I thought you can’t leave your ticketed cabin? Or is this one of those times where that’s okay?
NO LAV FOR YOU
To further blur the lines between “Global First” and “BusinessFirst,” there were absolutely no curtains drawn at either the forward or rear part of the F cabin. That means that light from the galley was quite bothersome (and made me glad I switched from 1A to 2A the day before). From my seat, I could see all the way down to the front of Economy. Again, lucky to be here, but I don’t see the price or mileage premium in this seat over Business. Sorry, BusinessFirst.
Taken from next to Door 1L, while waiting for the lav.
But anyway. As we crossed into the western United States, 'twas time for the second meal service. Remember BKK-FRA on TG? This flight was a mere 150 miles shorter, and only 15 minutes shorter time-wise. Compare that to this:
Menu
PRIOR TO ARRIVAL
Cajun-spiced Chicken and Juraregal Cheese Sandwich
Mediterranean-style potato salad.
Ploughman's Selection
Cottage loaf, cheese wedges, tomato and red pepper chutney, fruit and garnishes
Scones and clotted cream with butter and fruit preserves
Cajun-spiced Chicken and Juraregal Cheese Sandwich
Mediterranean-style potato salad.
Ploughman's Selection
Cottage loaf, cheese wedges, tomato and red pepper chutney, fruit and garnishes
Scones and clotted cream with butter and fruit preserves
That's it.
I think I saw this in the Lean Cuisine selection at my local grocer's freezer.
LHR catering knows how to do scones, but the salad was an affront to taste buds everywhere. Blech.
The best part of the meal. I grabbed it in the BMI lounge. The UA FAs didn't bat an eye to it, but I wouldn't dare pull outside food out on a TG/SQ flight.
As the line for the F lav grew, we began our approach into LAX. Smoggy. Hot. Lacking greenery. Good to be headed home!
There's an ocean somewhere there ...
Before landing, the team of FAs came by to thank every passenger for flying Uni ... LOL, JK, NOTHING OF THE SORT. Though there were suddenly a lot of Y and J FAs who marched through the aisles to do whatever it is they needed to do up front. Probably to use the F lav.
Through the parade of FAs, this somehow fell on the ground and remained for the duration of the flight. I would have picked it up, but the seatbelt sign was on ...
We made our way to a gate at T7, and were asked by the purser over the PA to close the window shades to keep the aircraft cool. I made my way to Immigration - I don't have Global Entry but our flight was the first to arrive, so there wasn't any line. I still didn't receive the "back-room treatment" that I sadistically want one day (only to validate the craziness of the trip); instead, I got a polite "welcome home" from the CBP officer.
It took about 20 minutes to get my bags out. I stepped outside to a refreshingly warm and dry 72º day in the Southern California area, with cool ocean breezes waving the palm trees toward the east.
There's no place like home.
Last edited by amolkold; Jun 2, 2012 at 3:50 pm
Jun 2, 2012, 2:10 am
#109
Original Poster
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: LAS
Programs: DL PM, UA PS, Hyatt Globalist, Marriott Titanium
Posts: 4,904
So, in conclusion ...
I guess I should wrap us this TR. It was a fun trip, and I sincerely have FT to thank (yes, sincerity in a TR that was lacking it in many parts).
I joined this forum over 4 years ago, to ask a naïve question about upgrading a Delta flight from LAX to ATL to F with miles. That’s it. That was the extent of my creativity and imagination. Upgrading a 4-hour domestic flight. After some reading, I learned all about the tricks of frequent fliers. Less than two years later, I got a free upgrade to F on that LAX-ATL route thanks to medallion status.
My last trip to India, I paid a certain price for an open-jaw trip from Los Angeles to Bombay to Atlanta, all in Delta Economy Discomfort. Three years later, I was able to fly to Bombay, and visit Singapore, Thailand, Vietnam, Hong Kong, and London for about the same price, but this time in First and Business. With showers, lounge massages, and transfers from special terminal to plane in a Mercedes. I probably ate enough free delicious food (and also some United food) to make up for the airport taxes.
I use this Trip Reports subforum for inspiration and the various other FT subforums for information. Let this be a testament to the newbies … if you dedicate the time and effort to doing some research, a trip like this is within reach.
I joined this forum over 4 years ago, to ask a naïve question about upgrading a Delta flight from LAX to ATL to F with miles. That’s it. That was the extent of my creativity and imagination. Upgrading a 4-hour domestic flight. After some reading, I learned all about the tricks of frequent fliers. Less than two years later, I got a free upgrade to F on that LAX-ATL route thanks to medallion status.
My last trip to India, I paid a certain price for an open-jaw trip from Los Angeles to Bombay to Atlanta, all in Delta Economy Discomfort. Three years later, I was able to fly to Bombay, and visit Singapore, Thailand, Vietnam, Hong Kong, and London for about the same price, but this time in First and Business. With showers, lounge massages, and transfers from special terminal to plane in a Mercedes. I probably ate enough free delicious food (and also some United food) to make up for the airport taxes.
I use this Trip Reports subforum for inspiration and the various other FT subforums for information. Let this be a testament to the newbies … if you dedicate the time and effort to doing some research, a trip like this is within reach.
Jun 2, 2012, 11:59 am
#110
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Denver • DEN-APA
Programs: AF Platinum, EK Gold, AA EXP, UA 1K, Hyatt Globalist
Posts: 21,602
amolkold, what an amazing trip and truly sensational report. Great pics and terrific narrative. Just loved your LHR-LAX United section. What a pathetic excuse for an airline. No one in their right mind would pay retail for such a substandard product. Once one experiences how great airlines treat their premium pax, flying UA or any NA carrier TATC/TPAC is a last resort.
Jun 2, 2012, 4:02 pm
#111
Original Poster
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: LAS
Programs: DL PM, UA PS, Hyatt Globalist, Marriott Titanium
Posts: 4,904
Just loved your LHR-LAX United section. What a pathetic excuse for an airline. No one in their right mind would pay retail for such a substandard product. Once one experiences how great airlines treat their premium pax, flying UA or any NA carrier TATC/TPAC is a last resort.
.I've always heard the gripe with NA intl F classes and finally understood it with that LHR-LAX flight, especially after experiencing LX/TG/EK F and SQ J (which beats UA F). The SFO-FRA flight on UA wasn't bad -- I think the 747 is a great hard product and for an overnight flight, still decent. Next time, though, I'll take the east coast LH flight, even if it is less time in international F.
It also shows how big of a pitfall that "no change after first segment" policy on US really is. Otherwise, it's a very lucrative program.
Jun 2, 2012, 10:45 pm
#113
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: PHL / NYC / PSA-BLQ
Programs: AA PPRO, Marriott/Hilton Gold, AMX-Plat, Global Entry
Posts: 3,110
Great trip report & a great read.
Like many good things in life, it evokes what we know so we can relate but brings something new so we can grow. All with a keen eye and wit. You spoil us.
Don't keep us on the hook too long before your next report, you may cause the voyeur crowd to take up a collection to get you on the road (or in this case up in the air) just for the entertainment.
Like many good things in life, it evokes what we know so we can relate but brings something new so we can grow. All with a keen eye and wit. You spoil us.
Don't keep us on the hook too long before your next report, you may cause the voyeur crowd to take up a collection to get you on the road (or in this case up in the air) just for the entertainment.
Jun 4, 2012, 3:09 pm
#115
In Memoriam, FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Durham, NC (RDU/GSO/CLT)
Programs: AA EXP/MM, DL GM, UA Platinum, HH DIA, Hyatt Explorist, IHG Platinum, Marriott Titanium, Hertz PC
Posts: 33,857
Thanks for finishing this up, one of the best TRs I've seen all year, hands down. Your humor at the United segment was truly hilarious too.
Jun 4, 2012, 3:30 pm
#116
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: SUX
Programs: BA Silver; HHonors Gold; SPG Gold; Points but dirt with everyone else
Posts: 8,050
Bravo on an outstanding trip report! I love the way your sense of humor comes through everywhere, and the photographs are great.
Regarding LHR lounges, come through T4 some time on SkyTeam with your ST E+ status and check out the food in the ST lounge. It puts the *A and BD lounges' breakfast to shame, as you can get most of a full English plus a continental breakfast. I hear BA has some nice lounges over in T5, too, so I'm rather astounded at the lack of quality of the *A lounge product. Guess UA premium cabin pax should be using the LHR-EWR/IAH flights that still leave from T4 because of gate access issues in T1, since I believe they get to use the ST lounge.
Regarding LHR lounges, come through T4 some time on SkyTeam with your ST E+ status and check out the food in the ST lounge. It puts the *A and BD lounges' breakfast to shame, as you can get most of a full English plus a continental breakfast. I hear BA has some nice lounges over in T5, too, so I'm rather astounded at the lack of quality of the *A lounge product. Guess UA premium cabin pax should be using the LHR-EWR/IAH flights that still leave from T4 because of gate access issues in T1, since I believe they get to use the ST lounge.
Jun 4, 2012, 8:01 pm
#117
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: MCI
Programs: AA EXP, Hyatt Globalist
Posts: 166
Great TR! I thoroughly enjoyed reading about your adventures in the air and on the ground....especially as a One World guy myself who might not experience these same carriers anytime soon. Looking forward to your next report.
Jun 5, 2012, 5:09 pm
#118
Original Poster
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: LAS
Programs: DL PM, UA PS, Hyatt Globalist, Marriott Titanium
Posts: 4,904
Great trip report & a great read.
Like many good things in life, it evokes what we know so we can relate but brings something new so we can grow. All with a keen eye and wit. You spoil us.
Don't keep us on the hook too long before your next report, you may cause the voyeur crowd to take up a collection to get you on the road (or in this case up in the air) just for the entertainment.
Like many good things in life, it evokes what we know so we can relate but brings something new so we can grow. All with a keen eye and wit. You spoil us.
Don't keep us on the hook too long before your next report, you may cause the voyeur crowd to take up a collection to get you on the road (or in this case up in the air) just for the entertainment.
at my rant when I told them about my experience later that week. Then they saw my pictures of TG/LH/LX/EK/SQ ...A year ago, my family would have smacked me upside the head when I complained about the UA flight, but all of them have now experienced a 4*/5* Asian carrier at least once in J (thanks to FT
) so they get it.Bravo on an outstanding trip report! I love the way your sense of humor comes through everywhere, and the photographs are great.
Regarding LHR lounges, come through T4 some time on SkyTeam with your ST E+ status and check out the food in the ST lounge. It puts the *A and BD lounges' breakfast to shame, as you can get most of a full English plus a continental breakfast. I hear BA has some nice lounges over in T5, too, so I'm rather astounded at the lack of quality of the *A lounge product. Guess UA premium cabin pax should be using the LHR-EWR/IAH flights that still leave from T4 because of gate access issues in T1, since I believe they get to use the ST lounge.
Regarding LHR lounges, come through T4 some time on SkyTeam with your ST E+ status and check out the food in the ST lounge. It puts the *A and BD lounges' breakfast to shame, as you can get most of a full English plus a continental breakfast. I hear BA has some nice lounges over in T5, too, so I'm rather astounded at the lack of quality of the *A lounge product. Guess UA premium cabin pax should be using the LHR-EWR/IAH flights that still leave from T4 because of gate access issues in T1, since I believe they get to use the ST lounge.
Thank you, former230. OneWorld is beckoning me. LAN J was a great product earlier this year, but now I'm ready to graduate to a OW F product. My AA balance isn't growing quickly enough and I still haven't found an excuse to include CX 888/889 on a coast-to-coast trip yet ...
Last edited by amolkold; Jun 5, 2012 at 5:14 pm
Jun 6, 2012, 10:12 am
#120
Join Date: Aug 2009
Programs: Hyatt Globalist
Posts: 215
But it was soon time to board, so I made my way to the boarding area. Lines were already forming, one for Economy and another for First/Business, so I stood in the latter. A TG agent came down the line to check boarding passes and passports, and upon seeing my BP with a large “F” on it, invited me to form a new line to the side for first class boarding. So I did.
Now given my age and the fact that I travel with a big backpack rather than a rollerboard or other business traveler accessories, I tend to have people often tell me that I’m not in the right place. I usually ignore them.
But the guy in the front of the J line was one of those people that wouldn’t shut up. Despite being told to form a new line by a GA, he’d keep making comments toward me like, “There’s a line behind me.” I chose to ignore the first time, but after he repeated himself, I simply responded, “Yes. There is a line behind you.”
“Buddy. There’s a line, you gotta follow rules.”
"I was told to stand here."
I could not have timed it better, but right then, a TG agent walked up to me: “Mr. amolkold, we are ready to board First Class please,” as she waved her hand to welcome me to the jetway. As I handed my BP, I fought the urge to turn around and see the look on his face.
Now given my age and the fact that I travel with a big backpack rather than a rollerboard or other business traveler accessories, I tend to have people often tell me that I’m not in the right place. I usually ignore them.
But the guy in the front of the J line was one of those people that wouldn’t shut up. Despite being told to form a new line by a GA, he’d keep making comments toward me like, “There’s a line behind me.” I chose to ignore the first time, but after he repeated himself, I simply responded, “Yes. There is a line behind you.”
“Buddy. There’s a line, you gotta follow rules.”
"I was told to stand here."
I could not have timed it better, but right then, a TG agent walked up to me: “Mr. amolkold, we are ready to board First Class please,” as she waved her hand to welcome me to the jetway. As I handed my BP, I fought the urge to turn around and see the look on his face.
So many things you could have done to this guy while you were walking down the jetbridge. Would have loved to see his priceless face.
BTW, great trip report! Loved the commentary and humor.