If there was ever a “dream route” for me, it would be an SFO/SCL route. But really, to anywhere nonstop to South America providing for easy SCL or EZE connections would make me happy. When the SFO/LIM route was announced, I decided that I should be on this flight. It would provide a good opportunity to visit a friend in Santiago, and tend to my vast international real estate holdings in Buenos Aires (an 80m2 apartment). While my initial thoughts were that I would have preferred this flight to be serviced by a LA (Lan Chile) crew, it is a LP (Lan Peru) designated flight. But you takes what you gets, and when life gives you any LAN plane from SFO, you take it. And so, the purchase for the discounted business fare earned me the appropriate sum of miles on my Alaska Airlines Visa, and so the miles to be earned for this trip would have me that much closer to MVP Gold on Alaska. And so it was good, or so I thought. But after nearly 20 times to Chile, I have learned that when life may throw you lemons, you make Pisco Sours.

Finally, the day arrived. Finally, a trip to South America when I could sleep until my normal time, get up, have coffee, check FT, the normal morning routine, and then go to SFO after the morning commute. Finally, a trip to South America where I don’t have to go to that third world pit of an airport about 340 flight miles to the southeast of here, to be able to fly LAN. I arrived at SFO approximately 2:45 prior to scheduled departure time, as there were absolutely no tacos (traffic congestion, for the chileno-impaired) whatsoever.

Check-in was quite slow but very friendly. First day issues. I recognized a member of the LAX ground staff at the counter. I received my SFO/LIM and LIM/SCL boarding passes, and a lounge invitation to the BA lounge. However, she told me to use the AA lounge (in a different terminal altogether, and not accessible. I politely corrected her, and she apologized.) SFO WELCOMES LAN boards, with an appropriate llama in the picture were in a few places. While I personally think that a guanaco would have been cuter, one cannot complain when LAN begins service to SFO.

Given the amount of time I still had, I thought I’d visit the museum in the international terminal. I don’t think I’d been in there since the terminal initially opened. Oh well, a private LAN event was going on. So, I went through security, and didn’t realize I selected the (shortest) line that lets you be an exhibitionist in the name of keeping the skies safe. I don’t know if my visit through that line provided a cheap thrill for anyone, but I didn’t feel any more violated than any other visit to the airport security theater.

Off to the BA lounge. It is at basement level, yet somehow is “Terraces.” So, despite going down in the elevator, I must have been on the Terraces (plural, no less). I’ve never been in there. It was a pleasant space, and provides for boarding right from the lounge, and LAN uses a gate that permits such boarding. [All the international terminal boarding areas @ SFO are in sunken areas down escalators, set apart from the shops/restaurants, making for a generally pleasant experience. I suppose those, too, are Terraces.] The lounge selection of food and beverages was ok, but (and this is difficult to admit), the Oneworld LAX lounge has better pickins. I was LAN’s second passenger ever in this lounge. There was a dedicated LAN rep, who was a pleasure to talk to.


Dimsum and other misc. crap from the BA lounge SFO

Boarding time - no announcements. Delay, delay, delay creep. Finally, we get the word to go, but alas, the lounge exit door boarding isn’t working, so it was up the elevator, a 30 second walk, down a long escalator, and then, to the gate. This was a horrible inconvenience of at least two minutes! As each passenger embarked, the ground crew handed him a certificate commemorating the Inaugural Flight 2609, and also, another gift, in a silver cardboard box. Alas, it was a nice scarf. Off to a great start, although my 55 minute LIM connection time was making me a bit nervous (which would normally be ample time for a LIM intl/intl connection).

Onboard, in seat 2D, my seat of first choice on the LAN 763, the crew comes around with newspapers and magazines, and a choice of water or juice. LAN apparently doesn’t have a ground alcohol license @ SFO (and they variably haven’t had one from time to time @ LAX either, so this was no surprise). The crew already seemed polite, but uninspired. The menu seemed somewhat appealing, and I knew I had about 35 movies and 500 CDs to choose from, and the wine list looked good.

LAN generally has a wine list which contains 1 mid-range Champagne, 3 reds, 2 whites, and a port. Every flight always has all of them. Well, until that day. As I’ve only flown this airline somewhat less than 200,000 miles (but definitely more than 100,000), maybe I just am not experienced enough. LAN also generally doesn’t do a pre-meal beverage service. However, they gladly bring you one if you ask when they are taking orders. Well, they did, until that day. I asked for a champagne aperitivo and it didn’t arrive until exactly when the cart came with the regular “starter” beverage service.


The Starter Tray - a shrimp, the salad, and the cheese plate - note the champagne to the right and the white wine in the middle, both served at the same time.

Now, the white wine I wanted to try was not onboard, as they only had one of the two whites. Oh well, no biggie, but irregular for LAN. I ate my salad and single shrimp quite slowly, as I had a long while to go, and I wanted to enjoy my meal. Others were almost done with their mains before I even had mine served, although the crew was really trying to perform a three course lightning round. They mostly had that cabin (28 pax) served 3 courses and cleaned up within 45 minutes. They kept checking to see when they could bring my main course. (I was not eating particularly slowly, but since they didn’t provide a shovel, I saw no need to shovel my food.) Finally, they cleared the salad and shrimp plate (I saved the cheese for later, to their disfavor), and brought the main.

The meat - tasted better than it looked.

The most premium of the red wines on the menu was something I wanted to drink with this. Alas, this was not to be, as they just didn’t have it. Nope, a much inferior substitute. Now, I have been on some LAN flights where they eventually run out of one selection or another, but to have one not even boarded, and another replaced with a poor substitute, oh well. After a couple of glasses of “Tinto Inferior” it was time for my cheese and crackers (much to the chagrin of the crew). I was going to enjoy my meal at my pace.


Cheese and Crackers with Tinto Inferior

The crew, eager to put this “leisurely” meal to an end, brought me my dessert, ready or not.


Tasty Tiramisu - again, better than it looked. It was quite yummy.

Finally, I finished (I was eating at a normal restaurant pace) and they could clean up and hide in the galley. Midflight, I asked for some more wine and dark chocolate. Out came wine, and two pieces of milk chocolate. I ate one of them, but really didn’t want the other. Later, I asked for a piece of dark chocolate from another crew member. Out came another piece of milk chocolate. I replied with a “this isn’t dark chocolate” (or similar) and she replied that they didn’t have any. Why they didn’t tell me this previously, I do not know. While seemingly petty, these things just don’t happen on LAN (or not until this particular day). I then continued with my movie, listened to music, and tried unsuccessfully to snooze.

A good two hours outside of LIM, they decided to serve the pre-arrival snack. Why so early? I don’t know. They wanted the cabin cleaned up a good hour and a half prior to arrival, so it seemed. I picked at it, but didn’t finish. Of course, it was served with milk chocolate!


The pre-arrival snack - more like midflight snack.

Finally, LIM arrival, with only about 30 minutes before my next flight to SCL was about to depart .....

I arrived LIM and darted off the plane (as did a few others) to the transit security (a quick breeze) and then off to the departure gate to see my 1:05 AM flight was delayed to 5:05 AM. I cannot express what my face must have looked like. (The plane was coming from LAX, so at least I knew it was en route.) A glum me went to the lounge (fortunately open 24 hours) as the last of the post-midnight bank of passengers was leaving. I used their internet terminals, had some water, used their computers some more, had more water, and then took a shower. Eventually the madrugada snacks were replaced with the breakfast fixins, the bartender left, the outside patio was closed and cleaned, the place was vacuumed, and I wandered and sat down, just trying to stay awake. Boarding commenced at about 5, and I think we departed at about 5:35 or so. Usually flight 601 serves breakfast right before SCL arrival, but the crew decided to serve it right after departure. I just put my seat fully flat and closed my eyes for 3 hours, but didn’t really snooze. This crew, a LA crew, despite their serious delay (same crew goes LAX/LIM/SCL) was delightful and cheery upon boarding and disembarking (although I didn’t witness the meal service). I’m sure the LAX-originating passengers had a delightful flight, despite their delay.

In all my LAN flights, this was the most serious delay, and I had never suffered a cancellation. Prior to this, the worst delay I had was 2 hours @ LAX, and when I checked in, there was an immediate apology, and a large voucher for a quite ample meal. Another delay was caused by fire smoke. Otherwise, I don’t know if I’ve ever been more than a half hour late flying LAN. But I felt (for some time) that when my streak ended, it would end in a big way.

The good news is that I figured my hotel room would be ready (although I anticipated that it already would have been for a very early arrival, as it often is). A slow wait for luggage, followed by a quick taxi ride on the Costanera Norte placed me at the San Cristobal Tower. I stay here between 1 and 3 times a year generally. Not many places you can go in the world (with so little frequency) that the staff greets you by name, and then wonders why you arrived too late “as we were expecting you much earlier.” My lovely platinum suite upgrade was awaiting me, and I tried to take a nap. I took a nap of sorts, then showered, took a walk, and called my friend. Within the prior week, his grandmother had died, and I knew he was in the south, and couldn’t confirm he’d be back before I arrived. Mind you, we were supposed to have dinner the 2 nights I was there. I called him to find out he was still in the south. I once met his grandmother, a crusty old Chilota from Castro, who I think liked to stir the pot, so to speak. My trip to her house, and the bizarre coffee she made us, which I pretended to like, is a memory I won’t forget. I particularly felt badly for his mother, whom I have met on a few occasions. I would later feel much worse. My friend was to be returning to Santiago about the time I was leaving. So, what does one do? Make pisco sours. I occupied my time, had my required lomito tomate palta, went out and about, and generally had a pleasant time. Days were lovely, nights were freezing. My Blackberry (Verizon) data wasn’t working at all, nor was my office remote access. The Blackberry problem it turns out was caused by Entel, and Verizon couldn’t do anything about it, and my remote office access, well, I still don’t know what the problem was. So, I resigned myself to not getting any work done (yay) and not having email access from the Blackberry (not a terrible thing, although when you expect it, you miss it).

Finally, it was time to return to SCL. A quick ride down the Costanera Norte, and I was back to the airport. This highway is once again functioning at 100%, and other than most of the false ceilings still missing in the airport, and a lot of portable A/C systems, one wouldn’t have imagined such a serious earthquake hit here such a short time ago. That, and a couple of the pedestrian ramps from the upper level roadway were still missing. (The hotel lobby bar was walled off and scheduled to reopen the following week, and was in a temporary location.)

LAN premium check-in SCL is in a separate room at the far end of the terminal, and provides for a quick check-in, followed by a premium no-line exit migration booth, followed by a quick no-line security station. I was then off to the LAN Neruda lounge.


Note the fresh fruit juices and the XO cognac and two kinds of pisco




The midday snacks aren’t as exciting as the evening ones, but they are ample.

And then, I was off, to EZE. Flight time was only about 1:25 that day, and they won’t commence service until after flying over the Cordillera. Then for a flight of this length, the typical snack arrived.



Lucky for me this day, Aerolineas Argentinas had a delay with the plane from JNB carrying the Argentine futbol team that had just recently taken a bath, because there were seemingly countless thousands of hinchas lining the highway and crowding everything near and about EZE. I got out of there just in time - the plane landed shortly after I was out of the airport. Traffic to the airport was a standstill for several KMs. I got to my place, spent a few low key days hanging out, spending two lovely dinners with my friend who takes care of my apartment, and that was about it for Buenos Aires. It was downright warm when I arrived (25 degrees, which is 23 degrees warmer than when I arrived in July a year ago), and while it cooled down a lot, was never particularly cold. My Blackberry worked generally fine, but my office remote access did not. Pisco Sours, remember?

And before I knew it, came the time to return to EZE. For the first time, I used the online ordering for Radio Taxi Premium and it didn’t function properly. (I reserved for “Now” and it confirmed “Now” but also put a time for an hour from “Now.” When I called when the car didn’t show up, she said I reserved for later. I looked at the confirmation which confirmed both the “Now” and the hour later time.) I went down to the street, got a taxi, set a price, and was on my way.

I was really looking forward to returning home on LAN as SFO would be my US point of entry. I could buy some duty free liquids @ LIM, no immigration/customs/security theater at another US point of entry, an easy LIM connection etc., and mostly, a flat bed seat for the final 9 hours of my journey. I arrived @ EZE to find out that this was not to be.

I went to the LAN check-in and the person who sends you to the right place asked me where I was traveling to. My face wasn’t happy when she said the LIM flight was going to misconnect, and sent me to the LAN ticketing counter. I darted over there to find out that my only option was to fly AA via DFW. There might have been another option to get to LIM in time (which I saw later) but it wouldn’t have been on LAN, and may have been more trouble than it was worth. It was too late to go via SCL. So, I was re-booked in the mid-cabin on AA (without true flat seats) and “made pisco sours” so to speak, except this airline doesn’t serve them. That, and now I had nearly 4 hours @ EZE. The pre-check-in security and then check-in at AA were insufferably slow, despite the ample time I had, and despite that there was nearly no line, because I was there 4 hours prior to the AA flight time. Notwithstanding this, the security and immigration lines took a total of about 45 minutes. I then sulked around the AA lounge, and then went over to the RCC.

The flight from EZE to DFW wasn’t horrible, but this AA crew had no finesse when it came to serving premium passengers. Fortunately on this 777, the middle seat in the middle section was empty, making for a more comfortable flight. Having flown UA EZE/IAD a year ago, I’d say AA has the edge in service. But it isn’t like a fine sharp edge, more like the edge a Sizzler’s steak knife would have. What was more disconcerting was that AA gave me a 1:20 connection time for DFW international arrival, immigration, customs, security, and go to new gate. And we were already delayed. And so the meal was so so, I skipped the breakfast, watched a movie, tried to snooze (mostly unsuccessfully, even with Ambien), and then was under pressure when the plane pulled up at the gate just under an hour before my SFO flight was to depart.

No immigration line, that took a minute, then the baggage - wait, wait, wait. The premium tag was really effective. HA. Fortunately, no customs line, and then up to security, which was so slow. A nice man let me go ahead (and encouraged the two in front of him to be nice to me). This ended up actually letting me make my flight. The security line was quite short and quite dysfunctional. I then ran for awhile without my shoes on, and put them on while waiting for the train to another terminal.

I arrived at the gate where the other two LAN LIM misconnects were boarding, and I walked onboard to hear one FA and the gate agent speak about how she thought she had already given my F seat away. She said she did, but she took it back! Yay. I was sweating pretty badly at this point from the running and the stress, but finally was in my uncomfortable MD80 seat for the final 3.5 hours of this trip. I have disliked the MD80 with a passion since one I flew just over 10 years ago fell into the ocean 8 hours after I stepped off of it. I was on one since due to an equipment swap several years back and almost had a panic attack when I saw the plane at the gate. Nevertheless, this was my plane, and it was going to get me home safely.

AA served a hot breakfast on this flight. It was disgusting, so I picked at it a bit, then decided to mash it up.



Finally, she took it away. As some of you may know, this is all the IFE you get on an old AA bird.

I made it home just a couple hours late, feeling kind of icky, but in life’s big picture, a lot worse could happen. Such as did to my friend in Santiago. His father had fallen ill and was in the hospital (also in the south) just after he returned from the funeral trip. I came home to learn that his father, too, had died. His poor mother lost her mother and husband all in a week. Although I only met him once, it involved a New Year’s Day whole BBQ’d lamb in Puerto Montt, and lots of wine from a box called “Gato.” It is days like those that make Chile “mi querido Chile” in ways that I cannot explain to others, and makes LAN’s faults on this trip so insignificant, for you can’t make Pisco Sours for my friend and his family this week, no matter how sweet the lemons from Pica and how smooth the pisco Mistral. Una lagrima de fe para ti, mi amigo.

And that was my trip. I am glad I went.

Fin

la la la la la

Loved your report, and very sorry to hear of your friend's passing. Perspective is a tremendous gift.

His father (I clarified that).

A nice report! Thanks for posting it.

I went through similar stuff a number of years ago on a CM award flight coming back from EZE. I think mine was considerably worse, but won't hijack your thread.

Great report EastBay1K. Terrific read. ^

Ah...I remember you posted this gross imitation of food over at the AS board!
Great TR(I would never want to be on an MD80 if the same happened to me),and I am truly sorry to hear about your friend's losses...

Excellent report! Did you fill out a complaint form about the wine situation or did you just figure it was an inaugural flight glitch?

And yet another TR on the inaugural SFO-LIM flight:

http://www.jaunted.com/story/2010/7/...FO-Lima+Flight

Very nice report. Sorry to hear about the MD80.

Thanks for the report EastBay. Also read the report on Jaunted...I thought the plane continues to GRU?

So you have to get off the plane and run to another gate for an equip change to get to GRU?

I really wasn't paying attention - I was too concerned with getting to my connecting flight. I'd imagine there's a complete crew change due to the flight duration (unlike LA601/600)

I didn't fill out a complaint form - I thought the service itself was a lot more of a negative than the missing wine. And then, the 4+ hour delay, and then the cancellation/reroute on the return. Do you know the best contact point to complain to? The online complaint form typically just gets one an "I'm sorry" with nothing further sort of response.