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Old May 8, 2009 | 4:23 pm
  #1  
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Walk me through security

Its been a while

So I get ready to pass security and this is what I can remember

Tickets in hand along with id.

Carry on luggage, purse, small cooler on belt for pass through

lap top in tub/basket for viewing?

Medicines, can they be in my purse or do I pull them out.

No liquid? Not even base coat makeup? Ugh!

My food is all pretty much okay so long as there are no liquids, or processed/canned cheese?

I take off my shoes?

Anything else that comes to mind? Does my medicine have to be in a baggie?

What kind of questions, if any do they ask?
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Old May 8, 2009 | 4:38 pm
  #2  
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Add the following if going through LHR

remove belt
remove coat
remove jacket/fleece/other clothes
remove hat

machine beeps

stand with your arms out being felt up
have electric wand waved at you
get told your braces/cufflinks/collar stiffeners should have been removed

ask security agent whether he regrets not passing his exams at school
get dogs abuse

go to supervisor to make complaint
discover there are no complaint cards

repeat often.
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Old May 8, 2009 | 4:42 pm
  #3  
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This could be a bit fun.....
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Old May 8, 2009 | 5:31 pm
  #4  
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"I take off my shoes?" LOL, it has been a while

It's a classic and humorous experience. Like that classic you saw in school, Dante's Divine Comedy. It starts with that sign over the entrance to TSA Checkpoint Land: Abandon Hope And Your Water Bottle All Ye Who Enter Here! Unless you are in BOS, where you are really going to have a rough day.

Just kidding, Just leave your bad* stuff at home, and you'll be fine.
*Like your bazooka, toothpaste, flame thrower, yogurt, dynamite, water, dignity, C4, rights, etc.
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Old May 8, 2009 | 6:06 pm
  #5  
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Originally Posted by Mr H
discover there are no complaint cards
.
Actually they have been removed for 'security reasons'......there is no point in complaining since everything that you complain about can be explained by the 'security reasons' line
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Old May 8, 2009 | 6:37 pm
  #6  
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TSA Stop #1 - ID and boarding pass bs
Put ID away
Move to line for x-ray
Place your belongings on belt, with coats, shoes, et al
Don't leave purse loose, put it inside bag better to hide wallet then make it too available for curious fingers.

Laptop goes in bin of its own -- if you have a protector sleeve that is just material, you can leave it in there but sometimes it's easier to take it out because they don't all seem to have read that memo
Remove baggie of liquids (max 3oz per liquid - fit into 1 sandwich baggie) -- or leave it in the luggage and watch how useless the charade really is
Medicines - if they're liquid it's easiest for you if they are in a separate baggie that can be pulled out. Make sure there is something that indicates prescription or who knows what they might do to "test" your stuff and thereby contaminate it. Again, leave this in the bag and likely nothing would happen.

If you are told they want to check your bag - tell them to wait for you. Do not let them walk away with your bag. Request they put on new gloves - from the box - before touching your stuff. Ask that only one person (if they're bored, they sometimes converge) touches your stuff at a time. If anyone is out of line in manner, or disrespectful to your property - watch them carefully and tell them to call a supervisor now, please - do not remove the eyes and look for the guy yourself, they will call one over.

I hate this process, these people and the thought of what this country has come to. It is just so friggin sad.
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Old May 8, 2009 | 9:51 pm
  #7  
 
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Originally Posted by Stars4SA

Carry on luggage, purse, small cooler on belt for pass through

lap top in tub/basket for viewing?
You may have too much stuff, you're only allowed one carry on item and one "personal" item, like a purse, briefcase, or small back-pack (day-pack size.) It seems as though you have at least 3 items here, 1) carry on luggage, 2) purse, and 3) cooler, with the laptop a possible 4th unless it fits inside something else. You'll need to reduce this to two items or be prepared to gate-check one or more items.
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Old May 8, 2009 | 10:37 pm
  #8  
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Please follow the thread in our Travel Safety/Security forum. Ocn Vw 1K, Moderator, TravelBuzz.
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Old May 8, 2009 | 10:56 pm
  #9  
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Originally Posted by GoingAway
Laptop goes in bin of its own -- if you have a protector sleeve that is just material, you can leave it in there but sometimes it's easier to take it out because they don't all seem to have read that memo
Unless OP has one of those TSA approved laptop.
Maybe they don't have read the memo on that as well?

Remove baggie of liquids (max 3oz per liquid - fit into 1 sandwich baggie) -- or leave it in the luggage and watch how useless the charade really is
You know it's 3.4 fl. oz or 100 ml.
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Old May 8, 2009 | 11:01 pm
  #10  
 
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You can leave your medicines in your carry-on, unless of course they are liquid medicines. If so, they do not have to go in your quart-size bag for liquids/gels/aerosols, but they should come out of your carry-on.
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Old May 9, 2009 | 7:21 am
  #11  
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Originally Posted by GoingAway
TSA Stop #1 - ID and boarding pass bs
Put ID away
Move to line for x-ray
Place your belongings on belt, with coats, shoes, et al
Don't leave purse loose, put it inside bag better to hide wallet then make it too available for curious fingers.

Laptop goes in bin of its own -- if you have a protector sleeve that is just material, you can leave it in there but sometimes it's easier to take it out because they don't all seem to have read that memo
Remove baggie of liquids (max 3oz per liquid - fit into 1 sandwich baggie) -- or leave it in the luggage and watch how useless the charade really is
Medicines - if they're liquid it's easiest for you if they are in a separate baggie that can be pulled out. Make sure there is something that indicates prescription or who knows what they might do to "test" your stuff and thereby contaminate it. Again, leave this in the bag and likely nothing would happen.

If you are told they want to check your bag - tell them to wait for you. Do not let them walk away with your bag. Request they put on new gloves - from the box - before touching your stuff. Ask that only one person (if they're bored, they sometimes converge) touches your stuff at a time. If anyone is out of line in manner, or disrespectful to your property - watch them carefully and tell them to call a supervisor now, please - do not remove the eyes and look for the guy yourself, they will call one over.

I hate this process, these people and the thought of what this country has come to. It is just so friggin sad.
pretty much it but i'll add a few things....

make sure all loose items are inside your carry on luggage or coat/jacket pockets-no loose items in the grey bins at all (cell phones, pens change, etc)

don't go thru the wtmd until you last item has gone into the x-ray machine

if your luggage and/or you are "selected" for an explosives swab, make sure that they use a fresh "stridex pad" from the container for each test and it's one pad for each item/body part tested. if asked why, tell the screener you don't want a false positive like you had before (trust me, i learned that one the hard way but thanks to our resident tsa folks here, that's what i was told to do in the future)
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Old May 9, 2009 | 7:33 am
  #12  
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Last edited by Bart; Sep 18, 2009 at 8:00 am
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Old May 9, 2009 | 7:57 am
  #13  
 
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Originally Posted by Bart
Get in line.

Pass through security without incident.

Get online.

Log in to FlyerTalk and whine about how broke security is.
Bart have you ever considered retirement as a new career option?
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Old May 9, 2009 | 8:02 am
  #14  
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Originally Posted by AngryMiller
Bart have you ever considered retirement as a new career option?
Hit a nerve?
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Old May 9, 2009 | 8:07 am
  #15  
 
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Originally Posted by Bart
Hit a nerve?
No, but your feeble attempts at sarcastic humor fall on deaf ears.
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