An elite member goes up to the Pearly Gates after passing away. He promptly asks St. Peter "Where is the blue carpet?"

Yeah, but SFO-EWR is probably a 767 which has, what? 25-35 seats up front. IAH-TPA is a 737... 16 seats, sometimes 12. Big difference.

Yes, 47 on the upgrade list for a 737 with 16 available seats. I heard that they just started automatically upgrading the United elites on the 12th. I saw lots of unusual looking elite cards in the line, so I'm sure that's part of the problem. For me, this whole merger sucks. I haven't flown a United flight since 2005, so I'll never see a reciprocal upgrade anyway.

They ended free meals in coach this week as well. Looks like they are integrating things using the lowest common denominators from each airline. Ending meal service--yeah that's very innovative CO. Maybe start charging for carryon bags, too. It's starting to be such that if you aren't platinum or better, you might as well fly on one of SWAs airborne busses.

And sorry, but I'll have to disagree with getting rid of miles qualifications. Most of my miles come from US East Coast to Asia trips @ 10k each way. Hell, most of my CO miles come from Sing Air, but OnePass has better benefits (or at least it seems so--let me know if I'm wrong; I'd be happy to switch at this point.) I do use CO for my domestic connections, and LAS trips (for conferences) and I do take flight 99/98 to HKG sometimes, which is actually quite nice if you get one of the upgraded 777s. I'd rather tear my arm off than take UA's HKG flight from ORD (that was the one I took in 2005)--but I suppose that will be CO soon. Dammit--CO was the only decent MAJOR domestic carrier left, and now it's United. Makes me want to move out of the country.

SFO-EWR is never a 767 - it's usually a 737, sometimes a 757. And that 60+ wait list often comes with a completely full F cabin. I fly the route often and consider a non full fare upgrade to be rarer than an international operational upgrade.

I was going to write that there's an inordinate number of elites right now because of the double-miles thing that happened last year, but then I remembered that CO just took on all those UA elites, so it's likely a moot case come March 2011.

However, until that next cycle begins, we're facing both groups, so many more elites looking for upgrades till then.

Here's the real joke:

How are God and an Elite different?

God doesn't arrogantly believe he is an Elite.

But here is hoping it will be soon, if not a 777, once it is a hub to hub route.

Surprised--I figured it would be a big plane, as IAH-LAS usually is. Well, thankfully, that route is never a possibility for me. My domestic connection is nearly always IAH.

I will say that the CO flight attendants were even nicer than usual today... I think they were uncomfortable asking people to pay for meals.


HAHA


OK, OK, here's mine. I made it up, so it's just OK:

Result of asking a flight attendant for a blanket on several different airlines:

Delta: "If you wanted a blanket you should have brought one from home. What the hell do I look like, your slave?"

SWA: <Flight attendant rolls eyes and smiles, "Hey everyone, do we have blankets on SWA?" The other passengers bleat in perfect unison, "NO!" Flight attendant shrieks, "WHY NOT?!" The other passengers, sounding oddly robotic, yell, "TO SAVE US MONEY!" People dance and cheer.>

American: <No response.>

Spirit: "Here you go, sir, that will be $35. You can save $5 next time by prebooking your blanket online."

United: <Flight attendant tosses you a blanket from where she is standing.>

Continental: <Flight attendant gives you a quick half smile and hands you a blanket.>

British Air: <A kindly gentleman hands you a blanket in a plastic bag and says, "There you go sir, have a nice flight.">

Asiana: <A beautiful flight attendant gets a blanket, removes it from the wrapper, hands it to you gracefully and asks, "Is there anything else you need sir?">

Singapore Airlines: <Before you can open your mouth, a supermodel wearing a sarong notices that you are cold, instantly pulls a blanket from nowhere, removes it from its plastic wrapper, tucks you in and apologizes for not having noticed sooner. She insists on getting you a warm drink and slippers before the flight leaves.>

Actually the last one isn't a joke. This actually happened to me in August.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oShTJ90fC34

-1

You don't want the UA 767 ghetto-bird; worst F seats in the fleet! The domestic 777s, however, are quite nice for transcon.

Yeah, but there is also a chance at an internationally configured 767, even on domestic routes. Also, the new UA may reconfigure the widebodies for all international and just use narrowbodies for West Coast to Hawaii, just as CO does now.

Elites are the savviest flyers in the air. They know the systems better than anyone else. They use it to their advantage. They spend less and get more. There's nothing wrong with that. ^

Nothing, that is, except when they extrapolate their worth to the airline; they mistakenly overestimate that. The airlines are doing the math themselves and are clearly coming to the realization that they're better off selling perks than giving them away to paupers who happen to fly a lot.

What does this mean to you and me? What will change when the airline rewards money spent instead of sore butts? It means there will be less yellow-toenailed bare feet on bulkheads in FC. ^

The FC security line at LAS is not always well monitored. And that's no joke.

Even the AUS-IAH today had at least 35 elites. First time I've missed the upgrade on that flight this year (ended up at #8 even)

And you're Platinum. Wow. The only advantage of gold now seems to be the 100% milage bonus. Sheesh.

Silver? I guess the free bag check is it. The milage bonus for them is nearly gone. Silver status is probably not worth remaining loyal at this point.

Hard to say, but I generally disagree. I think the majority of elites have a lot of choice of carrier. I certainly do. If CO/United erodes the value of elite status too much, I'll switch 90 of my money to the non-US carriers whose flights are generally a lot more comfortable. One person doing that is nothing, of course, but I don't think the other elites are any dumber than I am...

And, sure, they may TRY to sell them (I received an offer to upgrade about a week before the flight for $300), but of those 16 TPA-IAH F seats, 16 are were filled with free upgrades. It appears that no one is buying.

What is "CO bronze" anyway?