henkybaby

Well... er... That was me too...

You see, I don't mind children. I mind misbehaved children. I never even blame the children themselves, but the parents. Given that it is now pouring with rain here in Sydney, the lounge is pretty much full too.

Dianne47

I was an educator in my working life and I never have any hesitation in speaking up to negligent parents in situations like you describe. In a hotel I would complain to the front desk manager and ask them to come to the lounge to view the situation.

I've talked to parents at the rim of the Grand Canyon, in airline lounges, in restaurants, etc. Kids running wild are my pet peeve. I don't get loud, I just speak quietly but firmly. I also consistently make positive comments when I see parents doing the right thing with their kids - like making them behave quietly.

Rant away, there are many people right with you.

heckenhocker

Dianne, can you come to Whistler and talk firmly to some parents here? Kid skied into me yesterday as his only way of stopping (I was downhill, really really not my fault), splat. I stopped to check he was OK, parent arrived.

Hubby (a ski instructor, but not at this resort) had seen the (ahem) quality of the skiing and politely suggested that a lesson or two might be helpful...cue ranty parent!

flying mermaid

^ Which is exactly right - children aren't genetically engineered to be badly behaved or not (although genetics no doubt play a role in how high spirited a child might be).The blame lies with the parents and I find the thought of a nanny being a prescribed remedy totally abhorrent.

Both parents should take responsibility for their children - not just the mother. I have seen so many badly behaved children and often there is an exhausted mother and an absent father, who is too busy being an important person to worry about the kids he has spawned. Even worse of course are the two absent parents - who believe their carefuly allocated and scheduled quality time is enough....

I am the original mother from hell and my kids have always known what the boundaries and rules were (although I don't believe in any sort of physical punishment). It hasn't stopped the kids from growing into independent, confident, creative adults.

I believe that parents these days allow their children to do what they like, because it is

1 - easier: discipline and value teaching take a lot of time and effort and most people these days are too selfish to take the time out from their own activities/work

2- doesn't spoil relationships : they want their kids to be their friends. If you set rules then at times it is going to get confrontational and kids are going to resent you. So much easier to just let them do what they like..

However it is all very short sighted. If you have done a decent job of parenting, once you are through the turbulent toddler and teenage years your children are going to respect and like you - possibly even more than if you were their mate and let them do whatever they like.

gomike

More lounges just need a play area like the *A lounge at LHR

LTN Phobia

I, the old fashioned, cold-hearted, non-PC, cruel, disciplinarian, draconian woman, declare that I still prefer that children are seen not heard (certainly not loudly!), and in addition, children should be seen almost still (i.e. not running around).

Edited to add: This should be "children and ADULTS are seen not heard (certainly not loudly), and in addition, children and adults should be seen almost still (i.e. not running around), unless playing sports or engaged in some other justifiable activities.

Swanhunter

This year I've seen far more badly behaved adults than children. Bored of drunk/arrogant/grumpy/ignorant people believing the world owes them everything.

oxtailsoup

It's all about setting the boundaries and keeping to them firmly.

A few years ago when my youngest daughter was 4 years old we went to our local pub to have a nice Sunday roast. My daughter had obviously decided that to sit still for an hour or so was not her idea of fun so she played up. She wasn't disruptive or anything like that but she was still acting like a bi..ch so none of us enjoyed the meal.

In the car on the way home I told her she was in serious trouble when we got home. Once at home I explained very clearly that the meal had cost me a lot of money and she had spoiled the occasion for all of us... therefore I was going to make her pay for the meal. I asked her to go and get her money savings box and emptied it out in front of her. It only totalled about £20 so I asked her to go and get her Leapster (kiddies version of a handheld electronic game) because I was going to sell it on Ebay to make up the difference. She was distraught and really did learn a lesson that day. Obviously we didn't really keep the money and toy but she was made to believe that we had that day.

She has been an angel (in public anyway) ever since.

sunrisegirl

I agree that the problem lays with the parents and unfortunately far too many these days think that just because they (very understandably) adore their children, everyone else feels exactly the same. As my father always says, why should everybody else be subjected to someone's child.

There's a lot to be said for "children should be seen and not heard" and that motto's always worked absoluely fine in the past. Not sure why so many think it shouldn't now.

If your children want to run riot then that's great in your own home, but not at all appropriate in lounges (hotel or airport), aircraft or airports (or a great deal of public places). That's a time for discipline and control to come into play. All very well saying it's better to allow your children to run around as they're happier that way, but be considerate of others who don't want to have to endure that. As others have said on this thread, including oxtailsoup who put it so well - children need to have boundaries set and know their limits. If this is done life is easier for everyone, including the children who learn right from wrong. Children make their friends at kindergarten, school, etc - a parent needs to be just that .... a parent not just a friend.

Despite what I'm sure some FTer's think, I actually like children and have a great rapport with them, it's just the totally inconsiderate parents who subject everyone else to them that turn me against the children.
Oh, and for those who says adults behave worse ..... sorry I've yet to see that in an airport/aircraft environment. Oh, except when EZY cancel a flight at LGW and their passengers come to express their feelings .......

voracious violinist

It must be the Christmas Spirit of Goodwill, since there are actually a lot of very constructive points on this thread!

Depending on the age of the children, I'd have thought best course of action is a quiet word in the nearest juvenile ear to say: "If you don't stop that right now, Father Christmas will send his evil elves to take back ALL your presents..." Certainly worked for me at the Tesco checkout on Christmas Eve, the child stopped screaming and stared at me in abject horror... Problem solved.

HIDDY

Ah, problem children again.

Like adults you'll get quiet ones as well as loud obnoxious ones....that's life. No point in losing sleep over it....it'll never change.

janehoya

+1, and mind you, I am the mother of a preschooler.

KenJohn

Resort I am in has 3 pools with lifeguards and 1 designated quiet pool without any lifeguards.

So guess which pool this Irish family of four kids comes to use. They were screaming down the place. The father was worse than the kids and was jumping into the pool, throwing his kids into the middle of the pool like a big child like it was a game and egging them on to do fairly dangerous things by the pool.

I really did want to cheer out aloud with the four year slipped on the wet floor (which they had created by throwing buckets of pool water at each other) and hit his head on this concrete when he ran crying back to mother. It is really the parent's fault not the kids.

This was beyond negligent parenting. That would have been to ignore the kids running around. The parents were happy to encourage the kids in dangerous activity around the pool. Sad thing is that it would be pointless even talking to the parents as a fellow pool guest since the parent clear do not feel there is any potential danger.

Moomba

Indeed. I had to move seats in the HKG Sheraton lounge last night as the woman who sat next to me was constantly sniffing. Not just little sniffs either, they were major gurgle at the back of the throat sniffs.

Disgusting.

dgwright99

And many others - eg BA LHR, and even the AS BR at LAX, though that one is not a separate room, at least it keeps them (including mine) in a far corner....