That's fine, we all have our preferences, but you're likely not in the majority of customers with that one. Asking once is not harassment, most people would see that as polite. Asking more than once, too early in the meal (people are still eating), or with some type of inappropriate attitude is not good service though.

On the first point, I too would get annoyed if I were asked "is something wrong with your meal?". The better way to ask is if everything is ok, if I need anything else. This way, if everything isn't to my liking, I have an opportunity to ask for a change, an addition, or whatever I need without having to call a server over...which almost always annoys me.

I still agree with you that a server being over-friendly or familiar makes for a poor experience. But offering basic services isn't the same.