Originally Posted by
GatorBlues
You have blurred the difference between what someone is obligated to do with what the majority of people would think is something someone should do.
Why is swapping seats if asked something someone "should" do?
Originally Posted by
kmersh
Recently, I boarded and found a child with Downs Syndrome in my seat and his Mother in the window.
She said that she was originally sitting with her son together but due an aircraft change they lost their seats and nobody at UNITED was willing to help her.
She apologized multiple times and said she really did not know what to do, as it was an aisle for an aisle, I didn't care, but could I say NO and force the kid to move (I wouldn't but it seems to me I couldn't)?
Isn't that a situation for the airline to ensure a child with special needs is seated correctly?
It is, but the airlines are notorious for ignoring problems like this. This is an example when I would readily swap.
Originally Posted by
GatorBlues
"Unreasonable swap requests" is a red herring. My post specifically stated that it was about requests that are not worse for the person being asked, which are then refused based on a blanket policy that no requests will be granted no matter what.
There are factors you almost certainly aren't considering. For example:
- a swap to an "equivalent" seat further forward may be a problem if the person doesn't like turbulence -- the middle of the plane doesn't feel it as much.
- a swap to an "equivalent" seat further forward may be a problem if someone has already stowed their bag in the overhead and doesn't want to swim up stream on deboarding.
- the middle seat is occupied by a thin person; I don't know who I'll wind up with if I switch with you.
- I like the side of the plane away from the sun; your equivalent seat is on the other side.
- I'm one of those people who prefer window to aisle. You're offer of a "better" seat is not better in my view.
- I just ran a quarter mile between gates, flopped into my seat, exhausted after a long and tiring day that started very early that morning, perhaps with the outbound flight. I'm settled in, I've got my headphones and music player out, and I'm just too tired to move because you want my seat. This is usually the case when I fly for business and, if I'm window or aisle in coach, there's really no seat you can offer me that's also window or aisle that I would consider better enough to move.
The fact is, you have no idea what I consider a "better" seat.
If there's a reason the swap is not an even trade in your estimation, then very few would fault you for refusing.
Except that I'm under no obligation to explain my reasoning to you. I don't have to justify my preference.
That doesn't make the behavior any less rude.
Since when is saying, "Sorry, but no thanks," to a request for a favor rude? I'd really like to hear your explanation.
Indeed, we have a hugely popular DYKWIA thread solely dedicated to rude passengers acting outside what the majority perceives to be appropriate cultural norms.
Where did you get the idea that switching seats if requested is a cultural norm? How so?
If it is, then I don't see why one wouldn't trade as a small favor to a fellow traveler.
I just gave a lot of reasons above. Just because you consider it a small favor doesn't mean that it is.
It's the blanket refusal to even pause to consider a polite request from a non-poacher that baffles me.
Well, I hope I've unbaffled you.
Originally Posted by
Proudelitist
It's the seat holder that gets to decide what is "reasonable", not the requestor. Frankly, someone poaching the seat before I get there gets dismissed out of hand.
^^^^^
[quote]However, even a request to swap that may seem "reasonable" to the person asking (wants to sit with their spouse for example, usually a
want rather than a
need) may not be reasonable to the rightful owner of the seat who has any number of reasons to deny it and whose definition of reasonable the whole swap rests on. Even if by any, normal social standard the rightful owner has no good reason to say no, they still retain the right to and nobody else's opinion matters. They needn't offer any excuse. They have the BP for the seat in question. End of story. [/quote^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Originally Posted by
flyerCO
Common sense is saying yes, if someone offers you something you like in exchange for something you like less.
You miss the point, I think. The person asking for the swap is in no position to determine whether the person being asked will think it's something that person wants.
BTW the FA can insist you move. Like to see you refuse after they tell you to change seats.
I'll let you know my flight schedule.
Also who refuses to move for a handicap passenger? Ethically and legally there's issues.
Someone with a disability,
in my opinion presents a situation that is compelling enough so that I would swap and, in fact, I have done that several times, and offered before I was asked.
The discussion here isn't about people with disabilities, or someone flying with a Downs child, but whether it's "jerky" to refuse a swap to a seat that the requester thinks is "better."
Every time I have been asked to swap it was always for a seat that I considered subjectively worse, and for a reason to which my internal (unvoiced) response is, "so what?" The few times my seat was poached (with one exception), it was by some parent flying with a child who pulled the, "well what am I supposed to do?" card. I would not switch and, each time, the FA backed me up.