Virginia is for Speeches
Dec 6, 2000 | 11:33 am
#1
Original Poster
Original Member
Join Date: May 1998
Location: Kirkland, WA
Posts: 6,932
Virginia is for Speeches
Losing my United religion
I took the Hunnybear express to LAX to board my full-fare morning flight to Dulles. I had called to confirm upgrades both ways on this overnight trip to give a talk on the future of E-Business. I headed straight for the Red Carpet Club, which seems to nave the nicest United agents at LAX, but there was a long line so I went directly to the gate. Do you have your upgrade certs? the nice young man asked me. Do you ever give free upgrades to 1Ks traveling on $2200 fares? I asked. Not any more, he said sadly, not any more. I handed him the certs as I mentioned to him that I thought United was doing a great job solving their problem of overcrowded flights by driving away customers.
The flight was in the two-class 767-300, which has the least comfortable First Class seats in the fleet. I had 1H, a bulkhead aisle with a private video monitor (but not personal videos, massages, or noise-canceling headsets). The flight did have laptop power. There was no preflight drink service because the lame excuse but we pushed back and took off right on time. When we were aloft the stewardesses passed out menus to the left half of the cabin. The purser Maria, who was very nice when interacting with me but disappeared for most of the flight, took my order first as a 1K and I selected the omelet rather than the two other carbo-bomb choices. I drank water throughout although it was refilled only once during the four-hour flight. I took my glass up myself once and refilled it right in front of several flight attendants who took no notice and made no effort to help as they dined on leftover First Class meals.
The movie was Frequency, a fractured fantasy film about a father and son who solve a serial murder through a ham radio penetrating a parallel universe via the Aurora Borealis. It wasnt that bad actually. After the film they showed the usual bad sitcoms. I read my book Burning the Tables in Las Vegas by Ian Andersen instead. It was very good.
Toward the end of the flight they served a seafood bisque and chefs salad but I passed because I wasnt hungry and just grabbed a box of Godiva chocolates, which were one degree warmer than frozensilverware temperature. The flight attendants congregated in the galley chatting for the rest of the flight, never thinking to stroll the aisles to see if any of the First Class passengers wanted anything.
We landed on time and my Hungarian driver Judith was at the gate to greet me. She whisked me via back roads and construction sites to the Lansdowne Resort, where the conference was. I checked in with a lovely young clerk who handed me the key to a room on the lowest floor. I winked and said, Is this a good room? You know what? she said, It isnt my best room, and took the key back from me, replacing it with a room on the seventh floor with an eastern view. I thanked her for the upgrade but it was really just a small ordinary room on a high floor.
I went down and met with the event people and had a yummy chicken & salmon dinner (surf & cluck?) with an excellent crme brulee, which I sampled to be polite even though as a rule I dont eat dessert. I fine-tuned my speech and got a good nights sleep for my talk tomorrow morning.
------------------
I hope you enjoy my Lion Tales. For photos, past travelogues, subscriptions, and more, see www.liontales.com
I took the Hunnybear express to LAX to board my full-fare morning flight to Dulles. I had called to confirm upgrades both ways on this overnight trip to give a talk on the future of E-Business. I headed straight for the Red Carpet Club, which seems to nave the nicest United agents at LAX, but there was a long line so I went directly to the gate. Do you have your upgrade certs? the nice young man asked me. Do you ever give free upgrades to 1Ks traveling on $2200 fares? I asked. Not any more, he said sadly, not any more. I handed him the certs as I mentioned to him that I thought United was doing a great job solving their problem of overcrowded flights by driving away customers.
The flight was in the two-class 767-300, which has the least comfortable First Class seats in the fleet. I had 1H, a bulkhead aisle with a private video monitor (but not personal videos, massages, or noise-canceling headsets). The flight did have laptop power. There was no preflight drink service because the lame excuse but we pushed back and took off right on time. When we were aloft the stewardesses passed out menus to the left half of the cabin. The purser Maria, who was very nice when interacting with me but disappeared for most of the flight, took my order first as a 1K and I selected the omelet rather than the two other carbo-bomb choices. I drank water throughout although it was refilled only once during the four-hour flight. I took my glass up myself once and refilled it right in front of several flight attendants who took no notice and made no effort to help as they dined on leftover First Class meals.
The movie was Frequency, a fractured fantasy film about a father and son who solve a serial murder through a ham radio penetrating a parallel universe via the Aurora Borealis. It wasnt that bad actually. After the film they showed the usual bad sitcoms. I read my book Burning the Tables in Las Vegas by Ian Andersen instead. It was very good.
Toward the end of the flight they served a seafood bisque and chefs salad but I passed because I wasnt hungry and just grabbed a box of Godiva chocolates, which were one degree warmer than frozensilverware temperature. The flight attendants congregated in the galley chatting for the rest of the flight, never thinking to stroll the aisles to see if any of the First Class passengers wanted anything.
We landed on time and my Hungarian driver Judith was at the gate to greet me. She whisked me via back roads and construction sites to the Lansdowne Resort, where the conference was. I checked in with a lovely young clerk who handed me the key to a room on the lowest floor. I winked and said, Is this a good room? You know what? she said, It isnt my best room, and took the key back from me, replacing it with a room on the seventh floor with an eastern view. I thanked her for the upgrade but it was really just a small ordinary room on a high floor.
I went down and met with the event people and had a yummy chicken & salmon dinner (surf & cluck?) with an excellent crme brulee, which I sampled to be polite even though as a rule I dont eat dessert. I fine-tuned my speech and got a good nights sleep for my talk tomorrow morning.
------------------
I hope you enjoy my Lion Tales. For photos, past travelogues, subscriptions, and more, see www.liontales.com
Dec 6, 2000 | 12:15 pm
#2
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: CLT US Chairman's, AMEX Centurion, salesman, college dropout
Posts: 39
<<I handed him the certs as I mentioned to him that I thought United was doing a great job solving their problem of overcrowded flights by driving away customers.>>
BRILLIANT LINE!!! Outright prolonged laughter
BRILLIANT LINE!!! Outright prolonged laughter
Dec 6, 2000 | 1:47 pm
#3
Join Date: May 1999
Location: New York City
Programs: UA MM-1P, Hilton Life Diamond, Marriot Life Gold, ICH Spire
Posts: 4,080
So as to avoid hijacking another thread, please see my comments about the movie Frequency in OMNI:
http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/Forum...ML/001400.html
http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/Forum...ML/001400.html
Dec 6, 2000 | 4:39 pm
#4
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: Los Angeles, CA, USA
Programs: AA PLT, SPG GLD, PC PLT SPIRE
Posts: 4,531
Originally posted by QuietLion:
[B...the Lansdowne Resort, where the conference was. [/B]
[B...the Lansdowne Resort, where the conference was. [/B]
Ouch![This message has been edited by onedog (edited 12-06-2000).]
[This message has been edited by onedog (edited 12-06-2000).]
Dec 7, 2000 | 7:54 am
#6
Original Poster
Original Member
Join Date: May 1998
Location: Kirkland, WA
Posts: 6,932
Sev-ROO-ga
Since my talk was moved to the morning I called United and asked for an earlier flight. It was not possible so I booked the 3 p.m. flight on American instead, on a three-class 767-200 in First Class. I had heard great things about the American Premium transcon service so I decided to give it a try seeing as United hadnt been giving me what I wanted much lately.
My Hungarian driver Judith took me through a series of industrial parks and gravel pits to Dulles, laughing all the way at the silly drivers who were fighting the freeway traffic. I got to the airport in plenty of time and checked in at the red-carpeted First Class line at American with a very friendly agent who told me I couldnt use the Admirals Club on my Premium ticket. I thought about trying again at the club because I had read on FlyerTalk that a Premium ticket includes the club but the Red Carpet was not far away so I went to the one by gate D8 and worked for a couple hours while I waited.
When it was almost time to board I poked my head into the Admirals Club, where a super-nice agent told me I couldnt get in with that ticket. I thanked her and headed out but a moment later she chased after me saying that she had been wrong and I could indeed come in. So she gave me a little tour. It was nothing special given that Dulles is a small station for American but it was about like a small Red Carpet Club.
By the time I finished the tour they were boarding all rows but there was only one other person in First Class so far. It filled up though and I ended up switching my preassigned bulkhead aisle with a very cute teenage girl so she could sit with her mother and ended up in the single center seat in back. Seat numbering was weird. The bulkhead was row 2, then there were three rows of two on each side of the plane but only two single seats in the middle for a total of 14 seats, about half of which were taken by employees.
Service was spectacular on this five-hour flight, the best I have ever had domestically. With the exception of the wine I would say it was overall better than even Uniteds transatlantic First Class service. The wine was a disappointment as all the choices were cheap domestic numbers. The pick of the litter was the very nice but inexpensive Villa Mt. Eden zinfandel. Susan and David, the first flight attendants, had a super attitude and were very attentive. Susan bent the rules and took the employees orders last although this being an odd-numbered flight she should have taken orders from the back to the front.
David began by passing out personal DVD players with a library of 25 movies, all of which I had seen before or didnt care to seethe same selection United had essentially. But then the food came. We began with Sevruga caviar, my favorite. I opted for a large portion with just some blini since I dont believe in sullying the taste of fine fish eggs with eggs, onions, and the like. A caviar spoon would have been good but I just used the metal fork. When they were done with the service they came around and gave me another large portion because there was some left. Smoked salmon was also an option for non-caviar-lovers. I had a shot of the chilled Absolut vodka they brought around on the tray with the caviar. Yum! Americans liquor selection was a notch above Uniteds, offering Bombay Sapphire gin and Skyy vodka in addition to the usual Tanqueray and Absolut.
Next course was a salad with two large pieces of lobster claw. I had ordered the Chateaubriand as rare as possible and it came next, a perfect medium-rare. The portion was not generous, only about four ounces. It came with excellent mashed potatoes and a few sliced carrots. As a rule I dont eat dessert but I wanted to compare the Haagen-Dazs ice cream sundae on American with the Ben & Jerrys on United. The Haagen-Dazs won hands down. Later in the flight came fresh-baked Otis Spunkmeyer cookies. Here United had the advantage with the much better Mrs. Fields.
There was light chop most of the way and the conservative captain left the seat belt on for hours at a time. When it went off I checked out the bathroom and found no special amenities. I watched Scrooged on DVD but it was a bit too adolescent for me so I finished Burning the Tables and read some magazines.
We landed on time at LAX and parked at Terminal 4, where a nice series of moving walkways and escalators whisked me to the street much faster than at Uniteds terminals. A short cab ride got me home to Marina del Rey, awaiting the return from work of my Hunnybear.
The end.
------------------
I hope you enjoy my Lion Tales. For photos, past travelogues, subscriptions, and more, see www.liontales.com
Since my talk was moved to the morning I called United and asked for an earlier flight. It was not possible so I booked the 3 p.m. flight on American instead, on a three-class 767-200 in First Class. I had heard great things about the American Premium transcon service so I decided to give it a try seeing as United hadnt been giving me what I wanted much lately.
My Hungarian driver Judith took me through a series of industrial parks and gravel pits to Dulles, laughing all the way at the silly drivers who were fighting the freeway traffic. I got to the airport in plenty of time and checked in at the red-carpeted First Class line at American with a very friendly agent who told me I couldnt use the Admirals Club on my Premium ticket. I thought about trying again at the club because I had read on FlyerTalk that a Premium ticket includes the club but the Red Carpet was not far away so I went to the one by gate D8 and worked for a couple hours while I waited.
When it was almost time to board I poked my head into the Admirals Club, where a super-nice agent told me I couldnt get in with that ticket. I thanked her and headed out but a moment later she chased after me saying that she had been wrong and I could indeed come in. So she gave me a little tour. It was nothing special given that Dulles is a small station for American but it was about like a small Red Carpet Club.
By the time I finished the tour they were boarding all rows but there was only one other person in First Class so far. It filled up though and I ended up switching my preassigned bulkhead aisle with a very cute teenage girl so she could sit with her mother and ended up in the single center seat in back. Seat numbering was weird. The bulkhead was row 2, then there were three rows of two on each side of the plane but only two single seats in the middle for a total of 14 seats, about half of which were taken by employees.
Service was spectacular on this five-hour flight, the best I have ever had domestically. With the exception of the wine I would say it was overall better than even Uniteds transatlantic First Class service. The wine was a disappointment as all the choices were cheap domestic numbers. The pick of the litter was the very nice but inexpensive Villa Mt. Eden zinfandel. Susan and David, the first flight attendants, had a super attitude and were very attentive. Susan bent the rules and took the employees orders last although this being an odd-numbered flight she should have taken orders from the back to the front.
David began by passing out personal DVD players with a library of 25 movies, all of which I had seen before or didnt care to seethe same selection United had essentially. But then the food came. We began with Sevruga caviar, my favorite. I opted for a large portion with just some blini since I dont believe in sullying the taste of fine fish eggs with eggs, onions, and the like. A caviar spoon would have been good but I just used the metal fork. When they were done with the service they came around and gave me another large portion because there was some left. Smoked salmon was also an option for non-caviar-lovers. I had a shot of the chilled Absolut vodka they brought around on the tray with the caviar. Yum! Americans liquor selection was a notch above Uniteds, offering Bombay Sapphire gin and Skyy vodka in addition to the usual Tanqueray and Absolut.
Next course was a salad with two large pieces of lobster claw. I had ordered the Chateaubriand as rare as possible and it came next, a perfect medium-rare. The portion was not generous, only about four ounces. It came with excellent mashed potatoes and a few sliced carrots. As a rule I dont eat dessert but I wanted to compare the Haagen-Dazs ice cream sundae on American with the Ben & Jerrys on United. The Haagen-Dazs won hands down. Later in the flight came fresh-baked Otis Spunkmeyer cookies. Here United had the advantage with the much better Mrs. Fields.
There was light chop most of the way and the conservative captain left the seat belt on for hours at a time. When it went off I checked out the bathroom and found no special amenities. I watched Scrooged on DVD but it was a bit too adolescent for me so I finished Burning the Tables and read some magazines.
We landed on time at LAX and parked at Terminal 4, where a nice series of moving walkways and escalators whisked me to the street much faster than at Uniteds terminals. A short cab ride got me home to Marina del Rey, awaiting the return from work of my Hunnybear.
The end.
------------------
I hope you enjoy my Lion Tales. For photos, past travelogues, subscriptions, and more, see www.liontales.com
Dec 9, 2000 | 10:36 pm
#11
Original Poster
Original Member
Join Date: May 1998
Location: Kirkland, WA
Posts: 6,932
The P seats on the AA 767-200 are like "old" 3-class Business Class seats on UA with lots more legroom. Pitch is about 60" but the footrest and recline are not terribly generous. They are 2-1-2 so pretty wide.