I should have kept track of such things earlier; I've heard some good ones over the years.

Today's euphemism, on UA#134 SFO-ORD, was a faulty "passive restraint" system in the cockpit.

The co-pilot's seatbest was broken. Why they couldn't have just said that, I don't know. Can't most people relate to the idea of a stuck seatbelt? Is UA more "creative" than other airlines?

"flow control"

Is that ATC or a, er, plumbing issue?

United 777 LAX to IAD, "the A/C is fixed but it will take 90 min for the computer to catch up with the repair"

2 hr later they announced the part came in

It is never good to imply there is confusion as to whether or not or how a repair is being made. This reminds me a time back when I was a little more of a white-knuckled flyer....

I was at the gate for and AS flight in SJC and we couldn't see the plane through the walkway curtains, but the GA announced that "there was a problem with one of the engines, but it should be fixed soon, and don't worry, the pilot has said he really wants to get home to his family tonight so he is confident you will be flying." Well behind her I could hear the engines coming on for like 30 seconds at a time and then stopping. (Or maybe cross bleed starter at least, but it sounded like the engines to be sure.) This repeated a few times. When we finally boarded the pilot said there was a slight oil leak and since we had a few minutes to spare in SJC he just wanted to go ahead and try and fix it there.

Well at the time I was thinking, what is their strategy, just turn them on and if they cut out on you after a few minutes we are good to go? Kind of like my old car in winter.

A seatbelt is an active restraint, because it has to actively be buckled in order for it to work (unless of course it's one of those automatic seatbelts).

My favorite euphemism for mechanicals: weather.

Fix leak, run engine, shut engine down, inspect for any evidence of additional leaking. Repeat as necessary.

Not to good to have a running jet engine when you need to poke your head inside to see if you fixed the leak. It is always nice to have your system operating and up to operating pressure, but sometimes you cant due to safety concerns of the mechanic.