I think I can speak from both sides of the issue, as I fly alone 95% of the time and am often asked to switch seats so friends or couples can sit together. Because I fly so often, I certainly have my favorite seats that I request regularly and early. But if the switch isn't to a majorly deficient seat, I'm happy to make the switch. Don't ask me to move from my bulkhead window in J on a 777 to a middle seat, but otherwise I try to be flexible! Something I learned the hard way was to ask where the other person is sitting before agreeing to the switch!

The 5% of the time when I'm flying with my partner, it's very important for us to sit together. Not so we can engage in scintillating conversation the entire flight, but because we're happier and more comfortable next to each other. Yes, even when one of us is listening to CDs and the other is watching a movie! And on those few occasions when our seat assignments aren't together because of a last minute upgrade or some other reason, I have no problems asking a fellow passenger if they might be willing to trade with us. This happened twice on our recent trip to Europe. One woman declined to switch because she was in her favorite seat, which I understood and had no problem with. I'm happy to say that the Special Services rep intervened and found another passenger willing to move for us, an act that was above and beyond the call of duty. On another flight, the man we asked didn't even hesitate to trade.

I guess my point is, there's nothing wrong with asking, and there's nothing wrong with declining. Unless you've got a pretty good reason for not switching, I think it's a small favor to do for someone. But if you ask and get a no, you should accept the response politely and go back to your seat!

on our trip to LA, my husband was in first, i was in coach (i let him sit in first, always! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif)... the gentleman (probably an FTer) sitting next to him, upon learning the situation, came over to coach, very politely and kindly offered his seat to me, which i thankfully declined....
to date, i still dont know if he wanted to switch seats because of my chatty husband, whom i sometimes do not mind to be apart from (at least for a few hours...) http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif

[This message has been edited by belle3388 (edited 08-16-2000).]

belle3388, on several occassions after overhearing some special circumstances, I have gladly given up my front seat for coach. Always accepted and graciously appreciated. A couple times, two of us gave up our front seats. No regrets!

PremEx, you were very kind to change seats. I'm not sure if I would have given up my seat, and I would not have asked if I was the other person in the same situation. Etiquette goes both ways.

Instead, if I were asking, I would offer the other person in bulkhead the opportunity to change seats with the lady sitting next to PremEx, moving that person to a seat with more legroom, and still be able to sit together as a couple in bulkhead. If I were in PremEx's situation I would have suggested the same to the couple and explain to them why the other person may be more willing to trade.

Unfortunately, I've only been in cases where I enter the aircraft (often happens on the UX EMB-120) to find a couple sitting in the exit row, occupying my assigned seat. They explain that they would prefer to sit together. There are plenty of other rows to sit together, so the true reason they would not say is they wanted more legroom. Well, in this case I just whip out my boarding pass and insist on my assigned seat. Its interesting how often the husband/boyfriend no longer wants to sit with his wife/girlfriend and opt to stay put in exit row.

I once asked a lady if she would mind moving from the first row of First Class to the last row.

She thought a moment and said OK.

The flight Att. said "I can't beleive you asked Joan Lunden (then of Good Morning America)to move !"

Beleive me if I had known it was her...I would never have asked...it would have been a fun flight sitting next to her.

Like you, I'd have moved as I've done in the past, and like you, I'd have possibly had some slight misgivings, and like you, I'd have felt good about helping sombody out by doing a real small favor! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/wink.gif

Incidentally, I've noticed that many folks simply do not want to move - period! Only once was I a bit perturbed over this when several years ago after a plane change (UA, SFO-HNL), it ended up costing me a FC seat when I decided that I'd move back to economy so that a girl friend and I could sit together! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/eek.gif

I apply the same rule to this situation that I do to life in general. I think we're supposed to help each other wherever reasonably possible, and what's a little inconvenience, especially when I'm just glad to have a big seat.

That being said, I do agree wholeheartedly with jAAck - find out where they are sitting first. There is a difference between a little inconvenience and complete discomfort, and I'm not going to make myself miserable so they can sit together.

Therefore, I treat each situation as a unique situation, and allow myself to make a decision either way, and if I am doing the asking, I ask in a way that does not make the other person feel obligated to switch.

Let me add to my story:

They did ask the only other solo in the window bulkhead to switch (to the seat next to me) and he just shot them a short "Yes, I would mind." So I knew I was their only hope.

To add discomfort to my new bulkhead seat, this same guy was one of those pax that "takes over" the common area between seats and on the floor. I was constantly asking him to move his stuff from my armrest, and he would just grumble. He used the floor in front of him (and me) as his personal trash can. It was littered with magazines and newspapers etc. which I kept shoving back to his side with my feet. I finally said something to him and he just scowled at me over his reading glasses. A real jerk. And he was wearing nothing but a old T-Shirt and swimming trunks. Bare footed the whole flight. I checked the manifest and he was a United Premier Executive. No idea if he was revenue or upgraded.

Anyway, thanks for the imput everyone. Next time I think I will just give a very polite explaination of my preferance for my current seat and leave it like that.

Also, someone asked if I was flying on a revenue First Class ticket. No, I was not. But my seat had been confirmed far ahead using a comfirmable upgrade certificate.

[This message has been edited by PremEx (edited 08-16-2000).]

however, i am sure any one of us FTers would no doubt move in a second for a mother and her children to be seated next to each other.... right? http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif

mrlimo, that is extraordinarily nice of you in doing so, but i would feel guilty and uncomfortable (the whole trip) to trade my coach with other’s first without any special circumstances and justification....

(would probably have kept going back to check up on how you were doing, until you gave up and traded back with me... http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif)

When I am asked to move and have no desire to do so, I simply grab the hand of my seatmate, smile seductively, at the poor unsuspecting stranger sitting next to me and say, "We too are way too passionately in love and celebrating our first illicit weekend alone together. I am sure you will understand." http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/redface.gif

Wow have I ever made a lot of really good friends this way. http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif Seatmates, not rejectees.

But in my case, I would not have been asked to move if I had any seatmate.

We just flew back from Reno with a last minute upgrade to FC and my husband said he would ask the person sitting next to me if he would mind changing. I NEVER would have asked. But it was only a one hour flight.

On a 5+ hour flight I would have said no (and have in the past). When I've said no it was usually because I was in the aisle seat and any other place in coach is very uncomfortable. While I felt bad for saying no, I felt good at having the seat I chose a while back.

I was in this position recently and I said "no, sorry." I have changed seats lots of times when it was not a net loss to me, but in this situation someone wanted me to take an undesirable window seat and I wanted the aisle and I stuck to my guns.

The crummy thing about this is that we shouldn't feel the least bit guilty (but I did, a bit). But I am glad I didn't move, because I don't like window seats except during daylight flights when the striking view is worth the aggravation of crawling over a seat mate to use the restroom...

I have my doubts on that score belle3388, I have detected a decidedly anti child flavor amongst many FT posts. It seems that all children are lumped together with the ones that are not being properly supervised by considerate parents (as if it is ever the child's fault anyway). Then again, these same people probably wouldn't want to be sitting next to the child anyway so would move but for different reasons than those that motivated our good Premex.