wdld27

Please explain if I was wrong in this situation. I was travelling business class with a seat configuration where all seats are individual. I always like to travel in the same seat when I fly. After I had sat down in my seat and was settled in, at two different times, two flight attendants (FA) asked me to change seats with a man so that he and his wife could sit next to each other. The FA offered me the same window seat on the other side of the plane. I told them that I did not want to move. Then the wife asked me to change seats. I told her that I did not want to move because I prefer to sit in the same seat all the time. The woman then called me a ......., in front of one of the FA, and went back to her seat. I asked the FA to speak to the woman about calling me a ........ However, the FA said that I had it coming since I was not being a nice guy. Was I right or wrong in this situation?

PTravel

Welcome to FT!

You were absolutely in the right on the plane -- switching seats is granting a favor, and no one has the right to demand that you do so. The FA's response merits a complaint to the airline.

Unfortunately, you're in the wrong forum on FT. I'll send a PM to the moderator and ask him to move it to the right forum (probably TravelBuzz, as you didn't mention the airline).

MR_MAMA

I think you were wrong. I would have moved.I think it's ridiculous that you would not move across so they could sit together. The FA was wrong for saying you should have moved, however serious,y would it have killed you to move? What's so special about your seat? I could see if it was a few rows back, etc, but in this case it would not have mattered and you could have done something nice for someone.

PTravel

Why? He chose his seat in advance and had a specific reason for sitting in it.

Is that your standard for refusing to move -- death? And the FA was also wrong -- VERY wrong -- for telling him he deserved being cursed at.

It's certainly not any of your business, nor the business of the people who wanted him to move or the FA. No one should ever have to explain why they don't want to grant someone a favor -- and remember, it is a favor, not an entitlement.

And maybe the benefit of doing some nice for someone was outweighed by the detriment he would have incurred by moving. You don't know why sitting in that particular seat is important to him, yet you're willing to judge him, too. Well, here are two good reasons why someone might not want to switch:

1. Sun coming in on one side of the plane, and not the other. This is a big one for me, BTW.

2. Being extremely flying-phobic and having developed specific rituals that permit getting through the flight. I used to be like that. One of mine was that I would only fly in a window seat. After 20+ years of flying, it's only within the last two months that I got over my phobia enough to fly in an aisle seat. Perhaps the OP is phobic and his coping mechanism is to always sit in the same seat (phobia extinction depends on familiarity). Of course, if this is the case, it's no one's business except the OP and he doesn't owe you, the FA, or the incredibly rude couple any explanation whatsoever.

Ancien Maestro

Jmho.. I think you were right in the situation.. as they left you in the seat..

The FA's and the wife didn't know that you really did like sitting in the same seat.. I wonder why they didn't switch up the other side instead of bothering you?..

Was there quite a few seated on the other side already?

dhammer53

I'm good to go in an A seat; but ask me to sit on the other side of the plane, and my neck strains.

I would have told the Flight att to blow it out his/her ear.

wdid27, welcome to Flyertalk.

hedur

No, I don't think you were wrong. Even though there are some who would say you weren't being "courteous", the fact is it's your reserved seat that you chose for a reason and you have a right to turn down any request to move, with or without an explanation.

Not that this changes anything but, out of curiosity, was there any indication that maybe the woman had a fear of flying that made her desperate to sit beside her husband? Was there an aircraft change or something else that happened that would have split them up after they had reserved seats together? Again, it doesn't change that you were in the right but maybe it would help to understand why the woman was rude and the FA refused to confront her.

As someone who has an almost debilitating fear of flying, there are certain things I attempt to plan for and control in order to minimize my anxiety. I say attempt because, in reality, anything can happen and you have to be willing to roll with it if you choose air travel. As much as it helps me to sit near someone I know, I would never give a fellow passenger attitude if they didn't want to switch to accomodate me. For all I know, they could have an even better reason than I do for wanting to stay in their chosen seat.

Allan38103

Some people have posessive or personal reasons for wanting a particular seat on a plane, most people do not.

If keeping your assigned seat is that important, it doesn't necessarily make you a bad person but it does make you look more like a DYKWIA. Looking/acting like a DTKWIA is a precious right that many cling to proudly.

Ancien Maestro

In all fairness to OP..

imo, it was wrong for the wife to react the way she did.. the wife had a right to be upset, but being rude and calling names doesn't help the situation..

QueenOfCoach

There's nothing wrong with the passengers asking, politely, and there is nothing wrong with you declining the request, politely. The foul language is uncalled for.

You might be on thin ice if perceived as disobeying a crew member's instruction. If the FA asked you to move, it might have been a good idea to accertain if that was a request or a crew member's instruction.

"Sir, would you mind moving?"

"To be honest, I actually would mind and would prefer to remain here, in this seat. However, I also am in the habit of cooperatively obeying a crew member's instruction. Are you requesting me to change seats, or are you ordering me to change seats?"

Ancien Maestro

Isn't a boarding pass a contract that can't be overrided by an FA, unless its for a safety reason.. or sitting in the seat doesn't comply with FAA regulations..

Simply.. just because.. I'm not sure if the airline would have the right to move any passenger designated without a reason other than musical seats.. but not sure.. don't quote me on this..

BurBunny

Here's another: I fall asleep best on my left side. I prefer when I'm flying if at all possible that not be the side facing the aisle, as even with an eye shade, people moving by can sometimes wake me up if I'm facing that direction. Changing sides of the plane would likely create a situation where I'd not sleep nearly as soundly.

pinworm

First of all, you have the BP for that seat. You reserved it, it's yours. You are not obligated to give it up. If you were, they could have forcibly removed you...but you are not and they couldn't. Not only that, you don't owe anyone an explanation as to why.

I find it's best not to engage in dialogue about it. A simple "No, thanks" will suffice. No bargaining, explanations, or rationalizations required.

If they wanted to sit together so badly, they could have booked seats together. If they were upgraded, they shoudn't have expected seats together.

You are not the meanie here.

Worse, you were vebally abused by another pax, and when you brought it to the attention of the airline (the FA is representative of the company she works for) you were told you deserved it. Profanity and verbal abuse are grounds to have her pulled off the flight.

Had it been me, I would have calmly escilated it by requesting a station sup or GA to attend.

In anycase, you have grounds to complain to the airline. Call customer service with the flight number, seat number etc. Explain exactly what happened. That FA needs to be disciplined. You may get miles out of it, but at the very least the division manager WILL hear about it.

trooper

Well said...

..and a big ^ to Queen of Coach for that particular approach. I will remember that one!

Why? Because it puts the onus squarely on the FA to actually state whether it is a request (which clearly can be politely declined) or a directive... which one can comply with while making it perfectly clear that explanation and justification for it being a crew directive will be subsequently sought.....

Surely "the other pax asked for it" is NOT considered justification for such a directive....

moeve

You know I came across a gent who probably truely wished he had traded. Coming back from Rome two weeks ago....

At FCO /FCI an elderly lady asked another guest to please trade with her husbands Aisle seat further towards the back of the aircraft since she was afriad of flying. she also explained that she could not trade with the middle seat next to her husband since that was a mother and a small child.

This guys says no he wants to be at the front of the plane (NOT C just regular Y) well no sooner had the door closed the pilots comes on to the PA telling us we would be on the ground for some time due to severe weather over the alps!!! This poor woman turned very pale but this guy would budge. Flight was full - even had an off duty employee on the jump seat.

I was sitting on the Aisle across from this fellow so I offered to trade with him so that he was up front and then I would trade with her husband at the back. No this guy was just being difficult and wouldn't even do that.

Well sure enough after take off we do have to go through parts of the bad weather and there are a few potholes in the "road" well the poor thing is now in almost flat panic and grabs this guys hand and must have queezed the hell out of it........

He did get his punishment though..... not only did his hand hurt but since we were over an hour late and he missed his connection!

I am not sure why you wouldn't trade but in some cases it is more comfortable for all if you did. I am sure my fellow from Rome wishes he had at least accepted my offer to move those 80 cm across the Aisle instead.