This past weekend, my girlfriend and I were talking about visiting her grandmother in TX. Grandma's health isn't what it once was and we want to get as many visits in as possible.

I raised the idea of a Chicago->Houston road trip and, to my delight, she seemed very receptive to the idea. She had done it once before, accompanied by a friend from college, and said it would be fun to do again. She's not as seethingly, bubblingly anti-TSA as I am and I don't think she entirely approves of my flaming disdain for the front-line TSOs (though she doesn't seem to object to my wanting to see Pissy and Nappy living in cardboard boxes, fighting off local stray animals in order to be able to eat that day) but when I mentioned that a road trip would be a nice F-U to the TSA she didn't disagree.

All this having been said, I've never embarked on such a road trip before and am a bit lost at where/how to start. What precautions should I take with regard to looking after my own safety since I won't have the all-powerful all-knowing all-wonderful TSA to do it for me? I'm thinking stuff like having my car checked out beforehand or even just renting a car, how long it's safe to drive in one shot, "scam-the-out-of-towners" schemes I should be aware of if we're eating/staying in a town in between, that sort of thing.

And on the lighter side, any good places to stop between Chicago and Houston for good sightseeing and the like?

Well, for one thing, be sure to pack lots of liquids, aerosols, and gels. Make sure they're large sizes. Also pack plenty of pocket knives, multi-tools, box cutters, and printer cartridges. Lock your luggage with sturdy non-TSA approved locks. Feel free to eat peanuts in quantities larger than 12. Enjoy the trip!

Once you have done as mentioned above in assembling your Eff You TSA kit, you will want to consider your transportation. If your car does not have a lot of miles on it, use that (but definitely get it checked out beforehand - oil change, check all filters, brakes, etc.). If you can score a cheap rental, go for it. Make sure the rate is unlimited miles.

Driving in one shot - when I take long drives, I stop to stretch my legs about once every 2-3 hours, or at gas stops. My usual cut-off for hours per day is 9-10 - anything longer and you can run the risk of drowsy driving (plus you will be better off the next day with more rest). Go to walmart (or your local grocer and stock up on snacks - will save you bucks big time).

If you have AAA, you can get a trip-tik for your route, which will show any traffic issues you may encounter as well as list out (not clearly but you can find it) approved restaurants and/or hotels. And stay in name brands. You can get an idea of where you will be at the end of any day and see what is around. My last big trip was Boston-Fort Lauderdale for my Dad's 50th HS reunion. We went Boston-Aberdeen MD-Jacksonville-Fort Lauderdale. I am a marriott guy so I searched for marriott hotels in the Aberdeen and Jacksonville areas and I knew i was in good shape.

Good luck - hava fun - and enjoy sticking it to the TSA!

Nice to see an occasional post that is full of frivolity.

Since I won't fly as long as the blue shirt Gestapo is uncontroled at U.S. airports I'll be driving from San Antonio to Galesburg Il. (near ) next month

I did a google map, got three possible routes and had AAA plan a route that looks more direct and takes major highways, and is the one we'll take. It'll be about an 18 hour drive so we'll drive about 9 hours each day. You can find name hotels on the internet or get help from AAA (we're taking a dog so get a list of places that take pets) if you have that. I'll have my car serviced in about a week and get new tires (which I needed anyway). I would just stay away from the really small places to stay. My wife lined up a Bed and Breakfast i Illinois that we'll be staying at there. Don't forget to check your spare tire and I'd probably get a can of the junk that temporarily inflates a flat tie (even though it tends to ruin the tire) just in case. Have a good trip. ( As for me I hate driving, I'll be supporting candidates of either party with cash and votes next election who say they'll end this craziness. )

Cool, will do. Couple points:

-Car is a 2008 Subaru Legacy with ~47K miles on it. Had no trouble so far but I'll definitely check filters and brakes. Also, what about tires? I know the penny test but I'd hate to leave the risk of a blowout to something like an eyeball evaluation - is there a way to get a mechanic to tell me straight if my tires are up for it without getting the hard sell on a new set?

-Re: rental cars/unlimited miles: is there a rental company that's particularly good about this? Also, if I do rent, which cars are good for long drives? I love my Subie and don't have a sports-car fixation, but if there's a certain model that just seems made for long-distance comfort, I'm open to suggestions.

-Which name brand hotels should I consider, or does it matter? I don't want to blow the money on a Hilton or other high-end place but of course I don't want to get stuck in "Bob and Ethel's Snooze-A-Rama" either. Is there a good middle-of-the-road hotel chain that has clean rooms and decent rates? Also, do they take debit cards? I'd rather not put anything on a credit card if I don't have to.

As to what to do/see, what do you and your GF like to do and/or see when you travel generally?

We often drive hard and long one direction, and take our time coming home the other direction when we do road trips, and we stop when and where we'd like. The car is always serviced prior to the trip, and I always tell the shop what I intend to do (i.e., drive 2K miles) so they check all necessary components. We've also rented a car with unlimited miles since it's often been inexpensive, especially with coupons.

Enjoy filming or photographing as much as you want without TSA arses in the picture or being screamed at that such activities are prohibited. And entire cans of sodas when you want 'em! No baggage fees so be sure to pack everything and the kitchen sink! You are prohibited from taking along quart sized zip-lock baggies unless they are filled with sandwiches or snacks with peanutty goodness.

Anyway, sounds like fun! Enjoy the planning and the trip!

Be sure to take along plenty of audio CD's of your favorite music. It helps keep the drowsies away on long stretches without a decent radio station to tune to!

PM me when you get to Houston. Maybe we can meet for dinner if our mutual schedules allow.

Wirelessly posted (BlackBerry8830/4.5.0.138 Profile/MIDP-2.0 Configuration/CLDC-1.1 VendorID/105)

Remember to stop at a police station, walk in, and tell them you would like to have your car randomly searched and you and your GF frisked.

I've made several 2000 mile trips that I could have flown. Neither of my parents liked to fly, so anytime they could get one of us to drive, they much preferred going by car. I never found it particularly onerous. Of course, it could be people who are born since 1980 would just die on a trip that took that long. TV and other stuff has badly trained them to expect everything instantly. But for me, a trip of this duration is no problem at all. I was well into adulthood before deregulation of air travel made it such a common way to travel.

I just wrote this in my initial post, but if you tell the mechanic what you are doing, they'll be glad to make appropriate service recommendations. Do you have a good mechanic/shop? I guess I trust my shop quite a bit and the tires they recommended on the last visit are great and were fairly priced.

I like Enterprise for the prices and the unlimited miles. As to the cars... I wish I had a recommendation; I mostly just take what they give me and so far it's worked out for me.

I'm generally happy with the Choice hotel brands for price, cleanliness and safety and yes, the free breakfast and coffee. I'm a planner, so I usually have the hotels planned in advance so I can compare prices versus the reviews and make a decent choice that way.

I've had no issue with using a debit card for payment; this is my usual method of payment. I just used mine at a Days Inn on Friday night with no issues. As long as you don't mind that they may put a hold on a portion of your funds (some do), the hotel doesn't care if you pay with the usual branded debit cards.

If you rent a car be sure to check about rates increasing if you go over state line. Awhile back some rental agencies were charging extremely high rates for cars that crossed state line (which they could tell by GPS).

I did this trip last year (Chicago to Houston) and I planned it out similarly to what you're doing now.

I have 2004 330xi and got new tires, as well as every repair my mechanic could find. I told him that we were planning a road trip and to fix everything! He actually found a crack in the water pump that could have been disastrous had it failed somewhere in the middle of nowhere. I also had a jack installed so that we could plug in the ipod.

I think it took us about 19 hours. We stopped in Memphis both ways, and stayed at a funky place called the Talbot Heirs http://www.talbotheirs.com. It was right downtown, in case you want to see Beale Street, eat some BBQ, etc.

We opted to take I-55 to I-10, which seems a little out of the way, but we were driving during a really bad storm and felt that sticking to the major highways was the best plan. If you do this, I highly recommend a stop at Steamboat Bill's in Lake Charles for some fried seafood

It's amazing how much less gas costs in Texas.

I've been able to keep most of my trips under 700 miles to driving. I've found I like traveling more that way. Thanks TSA for showing me the countryside! ^

This is where most of it is refined...costs less to get it to the pump!!