Now here is what I call a reasonable guarantee. I wish the major airlines would adopt it (note the wording re "courteous service".

Aloha Airlines Guarantee

We're guaranteeing your satisfaction because we're confident in our ability to live up to our promises. And, as you know, we're constantly looking for ways to improve. Simply stated, our guarantee says that if you're not satisfied with the following components of our guarantee program, we'll give you a free one-way inter-island ticket.

Timely departures and arrivals. We usually take off and land within minutes of our printed schedule (flights that depart and arrive within 15 minutes of printed schedule are considered on time according to the DOT). At Aloha, we never rush the boarding process or neglect maintenance to be on time. If we're off schedule, there may be a good reason. But we hope our overall service will more than compensate for a short delay.

Prompt delivery of your baggage. Not only will you arrive on time, but your luggage will, too. Should we fail to get your luggage to its destination efficiently or if we fail to handle it carefully, you get a free one-way inter-island ticket good for travel in Hawaii. Not to mention, our sincerest apologies.

Courteous service with the spirit of aloha. Aloha Airlines employees, from ground crew to flight crew are committed to delivering more than what you expect from an airline. You'll find them responsive, efficient, gracious, and respectful in every way. That's the Aloha Airlines spirit. And it's guaranteed.

Sounds pretty darn good to me. I only wish they flew to more locations!