As I often travel alone, I am frequently asked to change seats for a number of reasons including 'We want to sit together'. If the person is a passenger and is is polite and the seat is not worse than the one I have, I will change.

If a member of a flight crew asks me to change, I will usually do so as I assume there is a good reason for the request.

As a woman it is often assumed that I am willing to sit next to a child. Not true!

^^

As mentioned in multiple posts of mine, I defend your ability to choose not to change seats strongly. You can choose to be as kind or as unkind as you wish. Of course that is your perogative. You can also choose your kindness to be contingent upon whom you feel to be deserving of such. No problem there. You absolutely have the right to do this and clearly it is your policy to exercise that right whenever you'd like. Again no problem with that from me.

Aslo, I do not suggest that everyone considers such a seat change to be a mere "inconvenience". I do suggest that for a normal able bodied person with no medical reasons, that the difference between an aisle seat and a window seat in F is not a major difference. Clearly you feel that being put into a window seat is a major problem for you... given that this seems to be a choice rather than an absolute requirment (I base this on your saying that you may change given the situation of the father) which would not give any other option.

I think we will have to agree to disagree. Short flight + Disable Child with Parent... no hesitation to switch to a window seat in F vs. Aisle... for ME. Clearly you feel your personal comfort (or some other unstated discretionary reason) trumps the needs (or discretionary comfort) of a family with a disabled child. I disagree with that benchmark. However, of course as I stated numerous times, you have no obligation to use my benchmark at all... no issue with that. Just as I can comment that I don't like your benchmark as much as I like mine.

(Bolding mine). Why assume the reason is discretionary? You say above that you base this on my statement that I may change based on the reasons of the father, but did you see the part where I said I might change flights and not just seats? You don't know my reason for not wanting a window seat (on what could be upwards of seven hours in a seat) and I should not be required to provide a justification to you or anyone else. My point is that it is not appropriate to judge a person who chooses not to change and not provide a reason.

Whatever you say. I stated my reasons. Actually I was more than clear that I was talking about a normally able bodied person. If you have an issue that takes you out of this category, then why even argue? It's not about you. I was abundantly clear in my qualifications of such so your objections sound hollow.

You have no obligation to switch seats and you have no obligation to explain yourself. Never said you did.

But let me ask you this... if this were a case of someone who was otherwise normal and able bodied, then do you agree that the kind thing to do would be to change seats for a family travelling with a disabled child?

I'm sure the parents wanted to share in the caregiving duties. Caring for an able-bodied child is tiring enough when you're traveling, let alone caring for a severely handicapped one...And you don't know what kind of caregiving she needed. Would probably be tough to do from behind her. Sounds like a great dad to me.

I asked someone recently to change seats with me so I could sit next to my husband on a DCA-PHX trip. Wasn't for lack of planning ahead...hubby happened to nail gun his finger a few days before my trip, so he was off from work and able to come with me. The only F seat available was not next to me. Luckily, someone was kind enough to switch. We don't get to go anywhere without the kids too often, so we wanted to sit together. You can't assume people didn't plan ahead. Things happen.

It would be the kind thing to do regardless of the child's disability.

She certainly understands the Golden Rule..."do unto others..." If my six year old would know what the right thing to do is, there shouldn't even be a debate here about it.

To be honest, I would willingly give up any seat in first and ride in the back (even on a long flight), if it was necessary to accomodate this family. This is "real life", folks. What is your comfort on a 4 hour flight really worth to you? I mean, what is it *really* worth?

-L

Could. Not. Agree. More.

I guess the question many of us need answered is how severe is the disability? Would the father's presence really help in the care of the child, or is he trying to force someone to give up their aisle seat purely for his own convenience? My guess is that it is the latter.

I guess the OP and others (myself included) is willing to give the benefit of the doubt to the father of a severely handicapped child. Something tells me that his challenges in life vis a vis his family are probably greater than mine or that of any other father blessed with healthy children. Wow.

I don't think you're using the term correctly. All the other stuff in this thread aside, the phrase "sense of entitlement" is typically applied to those who want to appropriate from others, not to those who want to keep what they have. No matter how boorish the folks here seem to you as they speculate on what they might do in a hypothetical situation, you can't accuse them of having a sense of entitlement for choosing to keep the seat assigned to them. If anyone has a sense of entitlement in this situation, it's the person who believes he is entitled to another person's seat.

You may believe he is entitled to the other person's seat too, but please don't accuse the person sitting there, who bought that seat and wants to keep it, of having a "sense of entitlement." No matter how noble the motives of the appropriator, or how base the motives of the possessor, the phrase "sense of entitlement" can apply only to the person who wants to take from another, not to the person who wants to keep what is his.

You MAY be correct from a strict semantics point of view, but I would be very surprised if most readers of this thread did not understand the point I was trying to make.

I also don't necessarily agree with your strict interpretation of this term. One could easily argue that someone has a sense of entitlement in that they feel they are entitled to not have to think about the needs of others. Clearly this discussion on semantics can go on for a long time and not come to any meaningful conclusion.

Clearly, the point we've been discussing has more to do with whether or not a seat switch should happen to accomodate (to whatever degree) a family with a disabled child. I am still more than a little dismayed to see how many FTers feel that this isn't a 'no brainer'.

All I can say is; thank god for people with this additude. ^

I recently did AMS-FRA-MCO (vice versa 2 weeks later) and eventhough I have been planning things for over a year, talking to the airline for over a year and actually having been assigned the proper (economy) seat for me and my family, the airline thought it was suitable to give us 3 seats allover the flight. All of them in places that do not only not fit my needs but actually worsen my health. Gate-agents refused to sort things out, leaving it to the flightcrew. Thankfully the woman asked to give up her seat helped me out, so at least I could sit in a more suitable seat.

To be honest, the outlook of a lot of people on this subject makes me sad. It's pretty obvious that I'm disabled and have particular needs, but you don't want to count the evil eyes I got these last 2 weeks whenever I preboarded (even when escorded by folks in uniforms stating on it they are ambulance personal ). It seems like it's more and more dog-eat-dog when it comes to flying.

My background is pediatric medicine, so I come at this question knowing the ins and outs of caring for a child with severe disabilities. If the child was bigger than a 4 year old, then, yes, a second adult would be necessary for almost any task that might be performed while on an airplane. Feeding the child, repositioning for comfort, dealing with seizures or muscle spasms, dealing with airway issues, any of these would require 2 adults.

Would you rather the father was constantly getting up and down, and standing next to you in the aisle while he helped his child?