Can you depend on a server's recommendation?
 

When I went to a new restaurant, or even one I'd been to before, I occasionally asked the server for suggestions. They usually didn't pan out for me, probably as much because of personal taste differences than anything else, but maybe not just that.

Recently, I have read several articles that servers are instructed what to say if asked, or even if not, because they restaurant needs to push certain dishes, either to use up leftovers, get rid of overstock, or because they got a good deal from their supplier.

Occasionally I get a god recommendation, but it is so hit-and-miss that a random request just doesn't seem worth it. The only case where it seems to work is if you go back to the same place and a server gets to know you and your tastes.

I wonder if other people have had different experiences and if so, what is their secret.

Can you depend on a server's recommendation?
 

Dish is recommended or "a customer favourite" = highest profit margin.

My basic assumption.

Mine too.

I prefer to tell the server a few dishes I'm considering and ask for feedback.

Re-read this paragraph a few time and the truth will sink in.

See if seafood ;) is recommended as the lunch special on Monday! :p

That's an excellent suggestion.

I hate a server coming to the table and telling me what he had for dinner or what his favorites are. My taste and preferences are probably different. Maybe I'm even allergic to his favorite meal. I also despise being told "great choice". It just comes off as he's full of crap. And, just my observation here, it's always the male servers that do this.

I find they can be useful in recommending what not to have - it tends to be more reliable as they're rarely under orders not to tell people something is bad.

What is really fun though is to ask for a recommendation, consider is carefully, thank the waiter and then ask for something else. You get some fantastic looks of confusion.

Even if they is no profit motivation, why trust someone else's taste preferences?

I routinely find two or three items that appeal to be equally. I'll then ask the server which he or her recommends. It's pretty easy to tell from their enthusiasm or lack thereof whether to move ahead with one of them. And they are choosing between items whose description appeals to me, so I have found this very effective.

Guess I'm not as cynical as others here. While I'm not naive enough to think there's not some house motivation to push a special, I've often found them to be quite good. I guess there's a difference between blindly accepting a recommendation or a special and asking a few probing questions and making a somewhat informed choice. And, if you don't like the way something sounds, by all means, don't order it just because it's the "special"!

I do let them know I have a bad shellfish allergy; and I am trying to choose between X and Y. If they are paying attention, they can usually steer me in the right direction. I am also very grateful, as others have pointed out, for servers who quietly let me know not to order a particular dish.

If a server recommends something, it's really easy to ask a very specific question (or two) about the dish and check his/her response. That normally works well for me in deciding.

A colleague once followed my original question by asking the server what specifically it was about the recommended dish that made it so special. The vagueness in the server's response to his second question made it clear that the server was being less than honest.

But I hear so many people ask "what do you recommend?"

I suggest you read "Kitchen Confidential" by Anthony Bourdain. He has more than a few choice words to say about "specials" and recommendations. ;)



http://tuebl.ca/download?id=38879&ti...20Confidential

remember asking the waiter once "what is the special" he didn't even reply
just shook his head slightly.
I think we just had drinks and moved on:p

My wife does this some, but more common, she does the variant, "what do most people order?"

Neither makes any sense to me. How are other people's tastes going to help my dining experience?

Restaurant manager here. Essentially what the chef requests the servers to recommend will be something that he/she got a good deal on, or something that if they don't sell it that day, will have to be thrown out soon. That's not to say it's not fresh (every city's health department has different shelf lives for various products), but if we ran sea bass on the menu the previous evening and it didn't sell as well as predicted, it might be run at a lower price the next night in order to move the product.

If you want the server's actual recommendation, ask what his/her favorite thing on the menu is AFTER having them tell you about the chef's rec or whatever it's called at that particular restaurant. If they really reiterate the chef's special, then it is likely to be very good because the server knows his/her tips ride on the suggestion often times.

Chris

I will ask specific questions (say, how spicy is x) or ask for their preference between two dishes, or ask what the difference is between two similar differences (and their preference often comes through as they talk). I frequently ask in Indian and Thai restaurants, and get steered in the right directions. I do it far less often in cuisines I am less familiar with / standard restaurants.

Me I can not, because as has been mentioned tastes are different.

I'm with this. Several friends are in the restaurant business and they actually tend to be proud and put a lot of effort into their "specials".

Of course you get taken for a ride once in a while, but rather that than let cynicism spoil the restaurant experience.

Restaurants really don't work like that. There's no screaming magic deal from a steak supplier. They're getting things from large food distribution channels. It's not like the Manager's Special part of your grocery story.

The people serving you are people. It's not like they're going to lie to your face about things. In any decent restaurant, they've eaten the food and probably dined there. Their opinions are their own. The owners don't have a lot of control about things and neither do chefs. What a server says and what the chef says are two different things. One of them is well paid, involved in many facets of the business, knows the customer really well and is immediately compensated if you're happy. The other cooks the food.

Communicating your allergy has more to do with avoiding cross contamination than menu choice. If you're in a place with a dish like that, then you've picked the wrong place to eat. No owner or kitchen who has a clue is going to have a dish like that on a menu.

Yes and no - when I worked as a restaurant manager, we would often get special pricing when our suppliers had a glut - usually on things like seasonal fruit and veg, occasionally they would send a small amount of a new product for us to try, not something we could use on the regular menu, but could create a special with it (things like a new type of cheese, a different cut of meat). Occasionally there would be a mis-delivery by the supplier, sending either an incorrect substitution (e.g. haddock instead of cod) or simply they loaded someone else's box on our delivery (so we got a box of something we wouldn't normally carry - it cost more for the supplier to collect and redeliver the mistake so they would tell us to keep and use the item). Rarely, the person doing the order would screw up and make a typo (e.g. instead of 12 dozen eggs, they entered 21 dozen, or if the order was 1 box of 24 items as the unit, someone would enter'24' as the number, and we would get 24 boxes instead [thankfully with things like this our supplier would normally catch it as being really odd, and double check!] ) so we would have to be creative in using up the item.

I once had a supplier double my usual standing order of cauliflower, because he got it at such a good rate, and wanted to pass the savings on (but rather than just give me the order at the lower price, he sent more cauliflower). I sent one of the junior cooks to go and make a batch of cauliflower cheese that we could put as a veggie special - the cook had clearly never made or eaten cauliflower cheese, but had asked someone else the basics, and mistranslated. She made what I lovingly call 'pre-school glue' (flour and water gloop) with some incredibly mild cheese - it was completely and utterly inedible! So I had to teach her how to actually make it (I didn't normally cook there myself!) After the minor blip, that day's vegetarian special of cauliflower cheese was actually delicious and a good option to order, yes, I had a glut of cauliflowers to get rid of, but they were all in excellent condition, and it was decently priced for the customer.

I worked in a restaurant whilst I was at college and each service we were told by the management what dishes we needed to push that day. We were even told to ask the diner if they were sure when they went against our suggestion. The reason for pushing a particular dish is either because it has a higher profit margin, or more likely, they have over ordered a particular item and want get rid of it

So take my advice, treat the server's recommendation with a metaphorical large pinch of salt

At nicer restaurants, especially ones that are relatively unique, AND with an experienced server, we have had good luck asking the server to build us a meal with the appetizers and entrees that best reflect what the restaurant does best.
Often something like "if someone were to only have one chance to dine here, what items reflect what this place is and what the chefs are all about?"

You see the server's eyes light up, and they ask you questions about what you like and don't like. If the server mumbles or looks confused, then we change directions and order from the menu.

We've had some really great and unique meals that way....

I had a friend in college who worked at Outback. I asked him what he said when a customer asked for a recommendation. He said "I name the most expensive thing to try and get a bigger tip"

Anybody that asks an Outback server for a recommendation deserves that.

Mrs BamaVol has been known to ask a server how spicy a dish is - on a scale of 1-10 in case the server has a strong immunity to heat.

I never ask for recommendations but I will ask for specifics
about a new dish I am interested in.

Anyone who eats at Outback deserves the terrible food they're served is probably more accurate.

My wife will always take forever looking at the menu, then when she's finally ready to order, she'll ask the waiter "is the xxx any good?" at which point myself, and both our kids will roll our eyes and just try to stifle the groan coming out of our mouths. Not once has the waiter ever said "oh no, that dish is terrible, don't order it". it drives me crazy.

I go with naming a couple of dishes I'm trying to choose between - usually I ask for further details and gauge my choice by their reaction.

I do much the same with the wine list. I choose a couple of interesting (non-obvious) wines within a certain (always low) price range and then ask the wine waiter his or her opinion, or whether something else is better. Again, I can gauge what to do by what is said in the reply - ie do they know and love wine and understand the price point, or do they just want to get me to spend more, or push some plonk which obviously will be no good.

Nope.
I tell the wait staff exactly what I want and I'm not really interesting in their opinion - there's a reason why they're on minimum wage and I'm paying for the meal.
Never let the tail wag the dog and that goes for the most supercilious maitre d down to the guy checking my coat and hat.
Now,there's no need to be rude or obnoxious about it but I like to let them know from the outset - and I particularly let them know when they try to pour my own wine for me.I'll fill my own glass when I'm ready,if you don't mind.

This.

If a server says "X is very popular," I'll then ask "but do you like it?"

It is also telling if a server pushes the most expensive this and that, whether it be a menu item or a wine. I recently had a waiter down-sell me on a bottle of wine by about $50. Based upon our conversation, and his previous taste of the wine, he thought it wouldn't be what I was looking for (i.e., not the style one would anticipate from the particular selection). That was a great waiter, and I took his suggestions for pretty much everything.

I listen to recommendations unless I think I'm getting an upsell. Just recently in a restaurant I go to often, I asked the server if they were getting a lot of orders for a chicken dish I was thinking about. She gave me a funny look and said "not many". I ordered it anyway, the chicken came out dry and I switched to the sushi special. I gave some feedback to the manager and they were very nice about it all.

Danger Will Robinson

Multiple posts have been deleted from this thread. They were off-topic/rude/personal attacks/etc. Take those discussions elsewhere - not here. Or get a room. Please stick to the topic.

Thanks for your cooperation.

iluv2fly
Moderator, DiningBuzz

As someone who worked in restaurants and bars for a decade, NO. Unless your server is very familiar with your tastes and knows you as an individual, do not depend on his or her recommendation. If the kitchen wants to push an item for whatever reason (too much was delivered, it's going bad, test-driving a new preparation, restaurant is overbooked and the recommendation is easy to prep), the restaurant will often run a contest for servers. Whoever sells the most of it goes home with a bottle of wine (or free dinner, or bottle of scotch, or whatever).

If obviously depends on the restaurant and the server a lot. I often ask for suggestions but I almost always give them two or three to choose among rather than the entire menu.

We had dinner tonight at a very good Japanese restaurant at which we are regulars. Excellent fish. We each ordered an appetizer. The manager and sushi chefs picked everything else, all sashimi, based on what they had available today. Back when Honmura An was in New York we were regulars, and even now when I have visited them in Tokyo I typically would pick at most one small dish, tell them which type soba to finish with and ask the owner to pick the rest of the meal. It obviously helps for them to know you when you give them that kind of latitude.

Sushi places are different - there you are communicating directly with the people preparing your food. Ownership typically limits this kind of interaction to employees that are trusted, which explains why bartenders are higher on the totem pole than servers.

One of the places isn't sushi, but your point is well taken. Actually in both of those cases we communicate directly with the owner.

I will sometimes ask for suggestions if I've narrowed it down to a couple choices, but I will only take their advice if it seems like they actually know what they are talking about. Even at upscale restaurants, I'm often surprised at how little the staff knows about what is being served and how it tastes...and it doesn't come off as them being polite (e.g. not wanting to say anything bad).

When I'm looking for a very broad suggestion I'll usually ask about the house specialty. For example, "Which one or two dishes is your chef is especially proud of?"

Often, despite my best efforts, the server answers with, "Our most popular dishes are...." That's not the same thing.

I may sometimes ask opinion between 2-3 different dishes, usually in smaller restaurant with limited menu. In a restaurant with 5 page menu I wouldn't bother as the answer would probably be : xxx is really popular.