True, but they are elders. Practicing Chinese with two boys his age and a 23 year old might be more interesting.

Have good news. I contacted my son's 35-year-old cousin who lives in Los Angeles. (Niece of the uncle). She told the Uncle that the guide had an American boyfriend and explained how American children were raised differently than Chinese children. Everyone also assumed that I knew the boyfriend well. (I didn't) The Uncle was happy to then let my son go with the guide. My son has had 2 real good excursions with the guide. Luck and a lot of work on my side (many emails and many contacts to many people) solved the problem.

Both my son and the family will benefit greatly from the arrangement.

Happy to hear it, DB. My adopted cousin has been back to Korea a few times, first with her mom (my aunt) and a group of people, and then most recently with just herself and another girl from same group (all Koreans). One of the "host" families from the first trip agreed to host the 20 and 21 year old girls traveling alone. For three weeks, they were forced to remain indoor much in the same manner as you described for Mark. The older hosts felt responsible for these "girls", even through they were independent, responsible women here in the US. THe entire trip was wasted, and highlights were when other pairs of girls, also traveling alone but with more flexible hosts, stopped by the apartment to share picture from their adventures. I am glad to see that Mark will look back on this as a great experience. He sure lucky to have a mother so in-tuned, and concerned, about his happiness.

Tell him to stick with Scouts, too. I think everyday about how the Scout Law and Scout Oath have made me who I am today and gotten me where I am (nb: currently unemployed :().

Be prepared.

An Eagle Scout award was the deciding factor on three hiring/promotion that I have not regretted making.

ucla Just for clarification, I am the father, not the mother.

DB

Before this gets to be ancient history, I wanted to post about my 12-year-old son's 2 month experience with his aunt and uncle in Wuhan. After I thought that I had the problem of Mark being cooped up in his room taken care of by what I thought was the family's acceptance of the guide, the guide took my son to play Mah Jong. (Mark loved playing it and wanted to buy a table to play it in the U.S.) Mark's aunt hated the idea and abused the guide for taking Mark to play Mah Jong. In fact, she made up a story about hearing from Mark's sister that Mark gambled while playing mah jong. Mark got so upset about his aunt's activities and the incorrect accusations that gambling went on that he wanted to come home.

The fact that he wanted to come home because of the accusations jolted the family into giving the guide a little more respect. However, it turned out that the guide could only take Mark out about every 2d or 3rd day because the family often would find a reason to cancel plans that Mark had made with the guide at the last minute. In any event, Mark got to get out on some occasions, which was good, but not enough which was not so good. On the other hand, his sister who is fluent in Chinese attended a Chinese school and did well.

Should add that I talked to Chinese people in the U.S., and they told me that 99% of the people who play Mah Jong in China gamble. So, I partly understand the negative reaction to the guide having taken Mark to play Mah Jong. On the other hand, it is difficult for me to understand the abuse that was heaped on the guide, who was always very generous and kind to Mark. (She even loaned Mark an expensive camera.)

Also, during the posting that occurred before someone asked why I hadn't planned more for Mark's activities before he got to Wuhan. In fact, I attempted to make plans, but my main contact (a son-in-law of an aunt) told me to wait until Mark got there. So, I deferred to his suggestion.

The bottom line is that there were a lot of cultural misunderstandings, and I now know what has to be done ahead of time before I take my children to China -- There has to be clearly accepted plans for the children to go out and experience the city. Without clear understandings ahead of time, any visits to Wuhan will be relatively short. Should add that Mark really likes to travel and has asked me if he can go to France next.

Thanks to everyone, particularly, Tentseller, for all of their help and insight.

(bolding mine)

Thanks for the update. I think Mark's choice says it all. This China trip probably is more a learning experience for you, instead of your son.