Let's see here...
I have an odd shoe fetish, I don't know where that comes from. I really enjoy wearing uniforms. I like to adhere to a strict policy, I prefer not to have to use my judgement or any common sense. I really like to mitigate between lower level workers and management types. I love all the drama that comes with working with young/immature people. I like supervising an area that is understaffed, with employees that are tired of not having the appropriate amount of staff. I appreciate having an upper management make decisions for me when they have no idea what my job entails. I like working weekends, holidays and evenings. I enjoy bidding on new work schedules frequently. I don't like consistency, and the idea of having a social life scares me.
Any suggestions?
Must... keep... mouth... shut...
Oh, what the heck, if it weren't for the lack of interest in a social life, I'd ask if you were any good at using a whip.
