Originally Posted by JS
Why was the window shade closed in the first place? Just leave it up all the time (unless sunlight is coming in directly, which is pretty rare). That seems to work better than lowering it and then "surprising" someone else when you open it later.
Actually, I did have it open. At one point, I fell asleep and, when I woke up, it was down. Either my seatmate or the FA must have lowered it.
Next time, don't cave so easily.
I wouldn't say the other passenger was in the wrong; after all, maybe he didn't think you cared if the window shade was up or down. Nothing wrong with asking, and like seat swappers, nothing wrong with politely refusing.
I think you're right and you've hit the nail on the head: it's fine to ask, but it's fine to refuse.