Although in general you must fly in order to obtain elite status, there are some opportunities to earn miless which count towards elite status w/out flying.

I believe that Delta has a cobranded credit card which provides 10K base miles which count towards elite status. Perhaps if you apply for three of these cards, one in your name only (w/out including your middle initial), one jointly with your spouse (but with your name and FF number as the primary card holder) and then another card in your name (including your middle intitial) then you may be able to "earn" 30K base miles w/out ever flying?

I don't know if this is really possible, and you probably have to consider what the annual fee for the three cards would cost you. As far as I know, only Delta has a credit card which allows you to earn status miles.

Good luck.