Hertz Ultimate Choice in San Diego. This was terrible for me. I rented a full size car and was told to go to the Gold Area to find my car. When I arrived in the Gold Area, a sea of shining cars awaited me to pick one. I was paralyzed by the choice. What car did I want, which one had car play, which was the fastest, the newest, the one with the lowest mileage? Was there a Mercedes snuck in here?

Mrs. Returnoftheyeti immediately grasped the situation and said, "O hell no, you get to pick one car, we are not looking at every single car in this garage. You can look at each one, but once you pick, thats it".

Confounded knowing that to the Mrs the most important feature of the next rental car was that it had 4 wheels, I walked the row. There were shining Kias and Hyundai's. Sad old faced Malibu's. A new Malibu, prehaps, nahh, that has an eco badge on the back, that cant be fast. A lone burgandy Fusion at the end of the row. The only Ford in the gold area. Should I take it with me? Nahh, its ugly as sin. I walk back down the row. A Chevy Cruze? And then I see it. A Buick Verano.

Buick. A luxury car in my gold row. This is the car for me. I slide in and take stock of the leather wrapped wheel and accented seats. I smile at the cheap parts bin USB connector that does not match the trim inside the center console. I take in the faint smell of cigarettes and broken dreams and look at the 30000 miles on the clock and I know this luxurious Buick is for me.

Mrs Returnoftheyeti says "can we go now?"

And so off we went, where the credit card was decliened at the gate, the Gods were trying to keep be from my Buick. I promptly provided another card and off we went to the GPS sync zone.

Seriously, San Diego airport has a designated area to pull over in outside of the garage to sync your gps. What crazy witchcraft is this?

I am returning the Buick to Burbank. She deserves her chance at a Hollywood lifestyle.