He's right about the asking though.

We've all been on flights where disproportionate chaos develops because one or two pax decided to do the opposite what they're supposed to do. The FA doesn't know you. When you do something that's not part of the normal flow, and you don't tell them what you want or why, then the natural inclination is to say "no" pending further information.

It seems like once you told them what you wanted, they were more or less fine with it--you got the bag back.