Last year, I had a woman at the PreCheck line Fort Lauderdale go crazy because I had a mobile boarding pass. She had no idea what to do as I passed through the metal detector.

It was her own plunge into cognitive dissonance: "He must carry his boarding pass in his hand, but his boarding pass must also go through the x-ray machine." Her brain went haywire, and then she gave up with a dramatic sigh.

That was the same day that I watched another TSA woman scream at an elderly, hearing-impaired wheelchair. She was frisking and swabbing this woman endlessly. The TSA woman said, "We're checking to see if you have a bomb." The elderly woman exclaimed, "A bomb?" (very loudly) "Why would I have a bomb?" In another moment of questionable logic, the TSA woman said, "That's why we're here."