At Terminal 1, the security lines after immigration are (or were) segregated by gender. It wouldn't surprise me therefore that the male line was short, but the female line was long, should the security lines still be segregated. I don't see how there's any condescending behavior there on the part of the employees of the airport.

However, I don't see why they couldn't accommodate that request, especially given that your flight was coming up. In any scenario though, your wife should have just asked the people in front if she could cut the line because you were rushing to get to your gate.