A tip is NOT charity. A good waiter can orchestrate the whole experience. A bad one gets the timing off and everything is just not quite "right" -- always interrupting at the wrong time yet never there when you need a fresh fork or a new cocktail.

A tip is paying someone for their care, service, and attention. They are WORKING. They are not a beggar asking for someone's charity.

To be a true charity, the money or gift should come from YOU, not from the pocket of your waiter.

No, a waiter is not poor and downtrodden. Neither is your doctor poor and downtrodden. Would you refuse to pay your doctor since he already has a Mercedes? You pay people tips or other payments for service in return for the service, not because you view a person who works for money as a poor, downtrodden person looking for charity. That's just silly.

If you want to give to the starving, give to the starving instead of eating at Emeril's. But if you eat at a fine restaurant and then stiff the waiter on the grounds that you are going to give the tip to the starving, I don't believe you. We both know perfectly well if you cared that much about helping the starving, you'd be dishing up meals at the soup kitchen or donating at your church or something, not pondering the creme brulee and the martini menu in a froo-froo restaurant.

If you consider those people who perform services for you as beggars asking for charity, I think you are going to have a rather unhappy experience as you go through life.