I rather feel like the TSA has played another one of it's mind-screws on us. Earlier today, I arrived at the airport to fly from DFW-IAH, presented my ID and mobile phone at the checkpoint - mobile bp didn't scan - thanks a bunch Nokia! Oh, and Up Yours with that $500+ N bloody 8 with 12mp camera and naff calendar functionality. I knew I should have gone with the iphone4. But I digress. I procured a paper boarding pass and made it through the ID check - same mindless comparison of last names, same judicious use of bodily fluid detection light to determine DL patency, same use of 1940's highlighter ink technology to indicate that last name on ID and last name on the boarding pass match, and that today's date does indeed appear thereon.

I walk to the stainless steel table and place my jacket in the tray. "Laptops out" screams the rather desperate looking TSO, sporting a Dirty Sanchez style moustache and hair combed over an otherwise unremarkable chrome dome. "I know!" I say belligerently and push my stuff into the mouth of the X-ray machine. "Laptops OUT!" shouts the TSO, again. "I have an iPAD - not removing it Bucko!", I shout back in exactly the same tone of voice. He seems harmless though so I break the gormless look on his face by asking him if there's anything new about the screening procedure today. He informs me that there will be if my attitude doesn't improve. 10 out of 10 for quick comeback. 0 out of 10 for silencing me and my right to be obnoxious. Two seconds later I walk up to the WTMD and as I pass through I nod at the old girl who is pointing me toward the only logical place my belongings will emerge from the x-ray machine. As I put my jacket on I ask her what the new screening protocol entails. She gives me a quizzical look and states that she is not aware of any changes. I ask her again, using different words, and even throw in a hint about groping people. Nothing! I asked another TSO how the enhanced safety procedures were coming along and he too looked confused. "You know? - the new invasive pat downs" I said politely. He said he didn't know what I meant and promptly disappeared.

I must say, based on this single data point, I am glad that there appears to be some genuine confusion among TSO's and I do hope it results in less hassles for the traveling public - of course, it won't.