Originally Posted by
Boraxo
(1) It isn't extra money - it is standard fee-for-service if you will. Think of it as buying an airline ticket and paying extra to check your bags. Except that restaurant service isn't optional (except at fast food).
(2) I agree that it would be nice if employers in the US paid a living wage so that tips were really only paid for extraordinary service, but that's not the way our system works. Understand that it is a cultural norm, just as showing the back of hand is an insult in some cultures. Deal with it.
Deep down 90% of these objections are from cheap Euros who don't like paying tips because they don't have to at home.
But giving you the benefit of the doubt I must admit I don't understand why tipping is so unpleasant for you. Most people get pleasure out of giving money to others, some even get pleasure from spending, so deep down I suspect the unpleasantness is just a reluctance to spend the money for something that you get for free in your home country. Be that as it may, you are certainly entitled to avoid tipping for whatever reason you like. Maybe you should find one of the restaurants where tips are already included in the bill before it arrives. Would that solve the problem?
I like giving e.g. to reputable charitable organizations like to the Red Cross to help earthquake victims in areas I know in Indonesia. I admit that I am unsure about giving a buck to someone in a bar pouring me a cup of coffee and looking like someone that has good connections with the mob. I may feel that he earns way more way easier than the woman sweeping the floor.
Regarding your question about restaurants where tips are auto-included: I feel this is like a service charge allegedly in use in some parts of Europe or like a fuel charge imposed by the airlines. I hate having to do the math myself and why it is called a tip / service charge while it just is part of the price. If it goes directly to the waiter/waitress then it should be called "wage" and in any case I'd like it to be included in the total price.
Everyone I know feels good about tipping here - like I said it's a Euro thing.
It is not only a European thing - no one of my many friends in the U.S. seems to like tipping either or at least they think that it has gotten completely out of hand.
