From the home office in Chicago's Midway Airport....

The Top Ten Problems Members Have With Frequent Flyer Programs.

10. Not knowing if they will qualify for next year's top tier with only 99,823 YTD miles.

9. No miles accumulation on Air Force One.

8. No elite qualification accumulated for flights departing from airports east of the Mississippi River, south of the Ohio River if the departure time is within 20 minutes of high tide at at Cape Lookout, Oregon on the third Tuesday after a blue moon in the fiscal 2nd quarter of the airline you are flying on.

7. When you already feel like a LUSer, you are forced to do the HoKeY pokey and get further inSULTed in trying to see if you MaYBe get upgraded when you purchase your ticket.

6. Having to start valuing your miles as worth 2 Turkish Lira each instead of 2 cents each.

5. Telling the agent you would like to redeem an award for anytime between now and the year 2076 and they tell you, "Sorry....all sold out."

4. Hearing, “After flying 38,000 miles through 4 continents and 15 countries over the course of 12 days and out mileage running 11 other teams, you have been enhanced.”

3. You get the feeling that your 2004 Super-Duper-Triple-Diamond-Ultra-Platinum card will be printed on the back of a free Whopper coupon.

2. Waiting for the day that they start charging monthly account maintenance fees if your account balance falls below 1,000,000 miles.


AND THE NUMBER ONE PROBLEM MEMBERS HAVE WITH FREQUENT FLYER PROGRAMS

Five words – ROYAL PAIN IN THE A$$.


[This message has been edited by DLSIZE (edited 08-29-2003).]