The new logic of UA Customer Service and compensation, referred here as: "New System" has recorded your comments with responses. The next time you call you will be asked for a cc number and for each minute you talk, your card will be charged $.25. minus free time...1p's get 3 free minutes; 2p two free minutes; 3p one free minute. 1K's are charged nothing if they have 10 booked trips in My Itineraries on a 3 month sliding average with no segments under 700miles. Global Services only need spend $9000/ mo. If spending drops, GS are warned, and shown a motivational video to help them maintain our minimum level of commitment....

PanHam, the "New System" has categories for specific themes of discussion. You have placed yourself in the category of "Fried Baloney". This term is used by "New System" when said caller turns up the heat on kind listening UA employee to magnify said fictitious flying experience to enhance compensation. It is suggested you apologize to UA employee, or "New System" will escalate your flight label reference from "Fried Baloney" to "manipulating liar". "New System" has found shame to be a useful tool for exposing manipulative flyer's..... Soon to be rolled out.....Large display signs above the boarding door of your next flight will display your current flight label as the CS agent scans your BP. Passengers with lower status waiting to board are encouraged to jeer or boo as cued by this display. FA's enjoying their new found power, shun your entrance to the plane & whisper to each other, ignoring passengers with negative flight labels. This is corrective action, encouraging our passengers to shape up!

PanHam, we do appreciate your humor...

Thank you for allowing us to use your splendid example to highlight "New System". You will receive as compensation one extra free minute on your next call. "New System" Out!